Re: I am such an awful person

[Guest guest]

I am considering making a chicken and barbed wire gate for my kitchen to

keep Dalton out.

Georga

Visit my new web page at www.ubahbookshelf.com

This tag line space for rent.

Re: Re: I am such an awful person

> We have some

> > chicken wire spanned across two pieces of 2x4's for an area in our

> > yard as a temporary fence. I plan to get the rest chain linked here

> > before too long.

> >

> is quite right. It took me a couple of years to get my yard fenced

> the way I wanted it.

>

> Salli

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I am considering making a chicken and barbed wire gate for my kitchen to

keep Dalton out.

Georga

Visit my new web page at www.ubahbookshelf.com

This tag line space for rent.

Re: Re: I am such an awful person

> We have some

> > chicken wire spanned across two pieces of 2x4's for an area in our

> > yard as a temporary fence. I plan to get the rest chain linked here

> > before too long.

> >

> is quite right. It took me a couple of years to get my yard fenced

> the way I wanted it.

>

> Salli

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

My vote is for the fences!

Sorry it makes you feel so bad. I guess I got off the hook on that type of

guilt since both of mine required the extra care. was so laid back

that it didn't phase him that I had to run after . We just didn't

spend much time outdoors until we got the yard fenced.

Don't feel bad about yelling. We all hit that point, sometimes more often

than others.

Sue

[Guest guest]

My vote is for the fences!

Sorry it makes you feel so bad. I guess I got off the hook on that type of

guilt since both of mine required the extra care. was so laid back

that it didn't phase him that I had to run after . We just didn't

spend much time outdoors until we got the yard fenced.

Don't feel bad about yelling. We all hit that point, sometimes more often

than others.

Sue

[Guest guest]

Hell, I am starting to wonder if would let us fence the front yard.....

Georga

Visit my new web page at www.ubahbookshelf.com

This tag line space for rent.

Re: I am such an awful person

> My vote is for the fences!

> Sorry it makes you feel so bad. I guess I got off the hook on that type

of

> guilt since both of mine required the extra care. was so laid back

> that it didn't phase him that I had to run after . We just didn't

> spend much time outdoors until we got the yard fenced.

> Don't feel bad about yelling. We all hit that point, sometimes more often

> than others.

>

> Sue

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hell, I am starting to wonder if would let us fence the front yard.....

Georga

Visit my new web page at www.ubahbookshelf.com

This tag line space for rent.

Re: I am such an awful person

> My vote is for the fences!

> Sorry it makes you feel so bad. I guess I got off the hook on that type

of

> guilt since both of mine required the extra care. was so laid back

> that it didn't phase him that I had to run after . We just didn't

> spend much time outdoors until we got the yard fenced.

> Don't feel bad about yelling. We all hit that point, sometimes more often

> than others.

>

> Sue

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hell, I am starting to wonder if would let us fence the front yard.....

Georga

Visit my new web page at www.ubahbookshelf.com

This tag line space for rent.

Re: I am such an awful person

> My vote is for the fences!

> Sorry it makes you feel so bad. I guess I got off the hook on that type

of

> guilt since both of mine required the extra care. was so laid back

> that it didn't phase him that I had to run after . We just didn't

> spend much time outdoors until we got the yard fenced.

> Don't feel bad about yelling. We all hit that point, sometimes more often

> than others.

>

> Sue

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

>>I would LOVE for to stop " being

autistic " ...but he never minds me when I say that. :-/<< thanks for posting

this, I feel guilty for wishing it but am glad to know I am not the only one.

Re: I am such an awful person

>I think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I

know how awful that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking

it.....I never should have yelled. >

Okay...first off, you are nowhere near awful. ;-) The prospect of

your kid running full throttle off a cliff is enough to put anyone

into overload---welcome to the world of fright/flight/fight. Then

you add in the guilt of your other child feeling a bit neglected or

hurt that so much attention goes to his sibling...ugh.

For whatever it's worth, I would LOVE for to stop " being

autistic " ...but he never minds me when I say that. :-/

Raena

[Guest guest]

>>I would LOVE for to stop " being

autistic " ...but he never minds me when I say that. :-/<< thanks for posting

this, I feel guilty for wishing it but am glad to know I am not the only one.

Re: I am such an awful person

>I think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I

know how awful that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking

it.....I never should have yelled. >

Okay...first off, you are nowhere near awful. ;-) The prospect of

your kid running full throttle off a cliff is enough to put anyone

into overload---welcome to the world of fright/flight/fight. Then

you add in the guilt of your other child feeling a bit neglected or

hurt that so much attention goes to his sibling...ugh.

For whatever it's worth, I would LOVE for to stop " being

autistic " ...but he never minds me when I say that. :-/

Raena

[Guest guest]

Your'e not an awful person, , just a tired

overwhelmed mom. It is hard to give up little pieces

of yourself. Sometimes it's necessary but it still

sucks. I go through " why can't I have nice things "

phases and often I get so sick of having to lock

everything up, but then does something or says

something that reminds me how much I love him, and

suddenly all the scarifices seem worth it, you know?

Hang in there hon, we're with you.

Tuna

=====

mom to:

, 8, ASD

, 4, NT

Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

- Whoopi Goldberg

______________________________________________________________________

Post your free ad now! http://personals.yahoo.ca

[Guest guest]

Theresa, thanks for sharing your thoughts, it makes me feel better.

>>When my almost 3 year old still acts like a 1 year old<< this is something

that I am having a hard time with and explaining to people. when they say, just

look how cute and fun he is, I agree and having a 1 yr is fun, for 1 yr not 3

yrs LOL...but we will make it right?

Re: I am such an awful person

I don't think for a second you're an awful person. I was just saying

the other day how I feel somewhat resentful that I can't do the

things I want to do.

Imagine how this feels. I honestly did not want to be pregnant with

Zach. I didn't want another child. I expressed it before I ever got

pregnant, and during my entire pregnancy. I talked to my doctor

about it. I convinced myself that since I had a husband now, it

would be easier to raise a child than it was with Alyx as I was

single.

That was all before the autism too.

I love both of my children a great deal. When my almost 3 year old

still acts like a 1 year old, I get mad...and sometimes at him. I

know it's not fair, and I try so hard not to take it out on him.

The last two days he's been very good, and I'm not feeling resentful

right now. But sometimes, it comes over me and I just want to

scream.

If I think about how devistated I'd be if I lost either of my

children...it takes away from when I think of how my life would be

had I never had them. I could not bear to lose them, even if I don't

wanna be mommy sometimes.

There are really cheaper ways to fence a yard even if they're not

pretty, at least they're safe. Maybe look into it. We have some

chicken wire spanned across two pieces of 2x4's for an area in our

yard as a temporary fence. I plan to get the rest chain linked here

before too long.

> We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where

DH is building our house. We have been working on the land part for

several years, so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a

river runs through it...... Well took off running for the

river so I took off after him and so (almost 4) didn't know

where I was so when I go back, he was crying. I got him to stop, then

went into garage to get garden tool box, 30 sec maybe, took

off the other way running through the woods about 1 foot from a 25

foot drop off to the river, I take chase and crying. got him (he is

quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt while and I

plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always have to pay

attention to " then gets up and walks into flower bed

and starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and

yelled " stop it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the

worst part...I think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being

autistic " ....I know how awful that sounds and I feel so badly for

even thinking it.....I never should have yelled. really is a

great boy. Its was just between chasing him and being upset, I

just lost it. I guess the reality of this being a life time issue

that isn't going away over night has hit me. I know I shouldn't

expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when I planned

to become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth it.

I normally am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies

because the time with the boys is so wonderful.......

>

> Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder

if after all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to

a different safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload

of money on fences.

[Guest guest]

Theresa, thanks for sharing your thoughts, it makes me feel better.

>>When my almost 3 year old still acts like a 1 year old<< this is something

that I am having a hard time with and explaining to people. when they say, just

look how cute and fun he is, I agree and having a 1 yr is fun, for 1 yr not 3

yrs LOL...but we will make it right?

Re: I am such an awful person

I don't think for a second you're an awful person. I was just saying

the other day how I feel somewhat resentful that I can't do the

things I want to do.

Imagine how this feels. I honestly did not want to be pregnant with

Zach. I didn't want another child. I expressed it before I ever got

pregnant, and during my entire pregnancy. I talked to my doctor

about it. I convinced myself that since I had a husband now, it

would be easier to raise a child than it was with Alyx as I was

single.

That was all before the autism too.

I love both of my children a great deal. When my almost 3 year old

still acts like a 1 year old, I get mad...and sometimes at him. I

know it's not fair, and I try so hard not to take it out on him.

The last two days he's been very good, and I'm not feeling resentful

right now. But sometimes, it comes over me and I just want to

scream.

If I think about how devistated I'd be if I lost either of my

children...it takes away from when I think of how my life would be

had I never had them. I could not bear to lose them, even if I don't

wanna be mommy sometimes.

There are really cheaper ways to fence a yard even if they're not

pretty, at least they're safe. Maybe look into it. We have some

chicken wire spanned across two pieces of 2x4's for an area in our

yard as a temporary fence. I plan to get the rest chain linked here

before too long.

> We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where

DH is building our house. We have been working on the land part for

several years, so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a

river runs through it...... Well took off running for the

river so I took off after him and so (almost 4) didn't know

where I was so when I go back, he was crying. I got him to stop, then

went into garage to get garden tool box, 30 sec maybe, took

off the other way running through the woods about 1 foot from a 25

foot drop off to the river, I take chase and crying. got him (he is

quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt while and I

plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always have to pay

attention to " then gets up and walks into flower bed

and starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and

yelled " stop it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the

worst part...I think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being

autistic " ....I know how awful that sounds and I feel so badly for

even thinking it.....I never should have yelled. really is a

great boy. Its was just between chasing him and being upset, I

just lost it. I guess the reality of this being a life time issue

that isn't going away over night has hit me. I know I shouldn't

expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when I planned

to become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth it.

I normally am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies

because the time with the boys is so wonderful.......

>

> Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder

if after all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to

a different safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload

of money on fences.

[Guest guest]

Theresa, thanks for sharing your thoughts, it makes me feel better.

>>When my almost 3 year old still acts like a 1 year old<< this is something

that I am having a hard time with and explaining to people. when they say, just

look how cute and fun he is, I agree and having a 1 yr is fun, for 1 yr not 3

yrs LOL...but we will make it right?

Re: I am such an awful person

I don't think for a second you're an awful person. I was just saying

the other day how I feel somewhat resentful that I can't do the

things I want to do.

Imagine how this feels. I honestly did not want to be pregnant with

Zach. I didn't want another child. I expressed it before I ever got

pregnant, and during my entire pregnancy. I talked to my doctor

about it. I convinced myself that since I had a husband now, it

would be easier to raise a child than it was with Alyx as I was

single.

That was all before the autism too.

I love both of my children a great deal. When my almost 3 year old

still acts like a 1 year old, I get mad...and sometimes at him. I

know it's not fair, and I try so hard not to take it out on him.

The last two days he's been very good, and I'm not feeling resentful

right now. But sometimes, it comes over me and I just want to

scream.

If I think about how devistated I'd be if I lost either of my

children...it takes away from when I think of how my life would be

had I never had them. I could not bear to lose them, even if I don't

wanna be mommy sometimes.

There are really cheaper ways to fence a yard even if they're not

pretty, at least they're safe. Maybe look into it. We have some

chicken wire spanned across two pieces of 2x4's for an area in our

yard as a temporary fence. I plan to get the rest chain linked here

before too long.

> We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where

DH is building our house. We have been working on the land part for

several years, so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a

river runs through it...... Well took off running for the

river so I took off after him and so (almost 4) didn't know

where I was so when I go back, he was crying. I got him to stop, then

went into garage to get garden tool box, 30 sec maybe, took

off the other way running through the woods about 1 foot from a 25

foot drop off to the river, I take chase and crying. got him (he is

quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt while and I

plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always have to pay

attention to " then gets up and walks into flower bed

and starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and

yelled " stop it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the

worst part...I think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being

autistic " ....I know how awful that sounds and I feel so badly for

even thinking it.....I never should have yelled. really is a

great boy. Its was just between chasing him and being upset, I

just lost it. I guess the reality of this being a life time issue

that isn't going away over night has hit me. I know I shouldn't

expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when I planned

to become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth it.

I normally am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies

because the time with the boys is so wonderful.......

>

> Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder

if after all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to

a different safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload

of money on fences.

[Guest guest]

>>I always feel

bad for my other two, since there are some things we

just cant all do together...<<

I wonder if we are going to get to that point too. I know at some point is

going to realize that is not like other little boys.....

Re: I am such an awful person

((((())))))

im so sorry you had such a hard time...

And NO, you are NOT an awful person!

I understand exactly what you are saying tho.I

feel the same way, many, many days...and

always feel like shit after thinking that way

too...Your little guy is little yet..it does get

" alittle " easier as they get older. My older son

who is 15 has a hard time with jenna when he is

here, and my 2 year old i think realizes there is

something different with jenna too. I always feel

bad for my other two, since there are some things we

just cant all do together...

just know, you are not a bad mom...we all get

mad now and then...

((((karen))))

nancy

[Guest guest]

>>I always feel

bad for my other two, since there are some things we

just cant all do together...<<

I wonder if we are going to get to that point too. I know at some point is

going to realize that is not like other little boys.....

Re: I am such an awful person

((((())))))

im so sorry you had such a hard time...

And NO, you are NOT an awful person!

I understand exactly what you are saying tho.I

feel the same way, many, many days...and

always feel like shit after thinking that way

too...Your little guy is little yet..it does get

" alittle " easier as they get older. My older son

who is 15 has a hard time with jenna when he is

here, and my 2 year old i think realizes there is

something different with jenna too. I always feel

bad for my other two, since there are some things we

just cant all do together...

just know, you are not a bad mom...we all get

mad now and then...

((((karen))))

nancy

[Guest guest]

>>I always feel

bad for my other two, since there are some things we

just cant all do together...<<

I wonder if we are going to get to that point too. I know at some point is

going to realize that is not like other little boys.....

Re: I am such an awful person

((((())))))

im so sorry you had such a hard time...

And NO, you are NOT an awful person!

I understand exactly what you are saying tho.I

feel the same way, many, many days...and

always feel like shit after thinking that way

too...Your little guy is little yet..it does get

" alittle " easier as they get older. My older son

who is 15 has a hard time with jenna when he is

here, and my 2 year old i think realizes there is

something different with jenna too. I always feel

bad for my other two, since there are some things we

just cant all do together...

just know, you are not a bad mom...we all get

mad now and then...

((((karen))))

nancy

[Guest guest]

>>Oh, yes -- sometimes there are county programs to help pay for things like

this. Worth looking into! Ask your case manager...<<

you all were right, Jack says it won't cost tons to do the fencing. we will just

do it in coated wire and post. I was just thinking of my SIL who spent $4k on a

wooden fence and it doesn't enclose the yard.

I am quite new to all of these. I did not know there were programs that might

help pay for some of 's costs (beside the education which I am so grateful

for!!)

Warm Regards

& ASD 11/25/00 in Maine

RE: Re: I am such an awful person

> There are really cheaper ways to fence a yard even if they're not

> pretty, at least they're safe. Maybe look into it. We have some

Oh, yes -- sometimes there are county programs to help pay for things like

this. Worth looking into! Ask your case manager...

-Sara.

[Guest guest]

>>Oh, yes -- sometimes there are county programs to help pay for things like

this. Worth looking into! Ask your case manager...<<

you all were right, Jack says it won't cost tons to do the fencing. we will just

do it in coated wire and post. I was just thinking of my SIL who spent $4k on a

wooden fence and it doesn't enclose the yard.

I am quite new to all of these. I did not know there were programs that might

help pay for some of 's costs (beside the education which I am so grateful

for!!)

Warm Regards

& ASD 11/25/00 in Maine

RE: Re: I am such an awful person

> There are really cheaper ways to fence a yard even if they're not

> pretty, at least they're safe. Maybe look into it. We have some

Oh, yes -- sometimes there are county programs to help pay for things like

this. Worth looking into! Ask your case manager...

-Sara.

[Guest guest]

but we will make it right?

Of course we'll make it. We must make it. We have no other choice.

And we'll be damn good at it too. It's a rollercoaster

And thank GOD for you people.

[Guest guest]

Ouch - you have hit a raw one there....it happens to us all.

Trying to juggle our time between, autism and the disorder that

brings, along with the typical mind, normal chores and what we would

like to do in our own time.

It isn't easy but I know we all do a fantastic job raising our

children - we make mistakes.

How's this for a being a jerk big time?

Daughter has autism - mother is red hot on not making any changes

without prior warning about the things that must change.

Anyway - three weeks ago, I go along to the hairdressers and without

a thought for anybody but myself I say to Nat (my hairdresser) " make

me blonde " I really wanted to lighten up my dark hair.

This is what I did and didn't give it a second thought....when I

arrived home, Liesel screamed, " I hate your hair " , tantrummed and

wouldn't speak to me for two days.

I called to see if we could change it back - but he said it was not

advisable.

She has settled now and has accepted it sort of - but how I hated

myself for being so selfish and stupid....Freyja on the other hand

loved it!

Don't beat yourself up, this house is going to be beautiful, when

you are living there you'll have more control over things and will

be able to make those areas safe.

Louisa

[Guest guest]

Oh , you are not an awful person! No one behaves well while being

pushed to the limit. Certainly yelling " stop it " is not excessive (if it is

and boy and I in trouble). It just sounds like you are feeling the stress

of it all, and this is completely normal. I might take this as a sign to do

something for yourself to re-charge your inner battery

don't beat yourself up!

(SAHM in GA)

MSN elizabethloht@...

n 33, mo, no formal dx

Phoebe, 11 wks

I am such an awful person

> We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where DH is

building our house. We have been working on the land part for several years,

so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a river runs through

it...... Well took off running for the river so I took off after him

and so (almost 4) didn't know where I was so when I go back, he was

crying. I got him to stop, then went into garage to get garden tool box, 30

sec maybe, took off the other way running through the woods about 1

foot from a 25 foot drop off to the river, I take chase and crying. got him

(he is quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt while and I

plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always have to pay

attention to " then gets up and walks into flower bed and

starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and yelled " stop

it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the worst part...I think I

really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I know how awful

that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking it.....I never should have

yelled. really is a great boy. Its was just between chasing him and

being upset, I just lost it. I guess the reality of this being a life

time issue that isn't going away over night has hit me. I know I shouldn't

expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when I planned to

become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth it. I normally

am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies because the time with

the boys is so wonderful.......

>

> Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder if

after all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to a

different safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload of money

on fences.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Oh , you are not an awful person! No one behaves well while being

pushed to the limit. Certainly yelling " stop it " is not excessive (if it is

and boy and I in trouble). It just sounds like you are feeling the stress

of it all, and this is completely normal. I might take this as a sign to do

something for yourself to re-charge your inner battery

don't beat yourself up!

(SAHM in GA)

MSN elizabethloht@...

n 33, mo, no formal dx

Phoebe, 11 wks

I am such an awful person

> We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where DH is

building our house. We have been working on the land part for several years,

so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a river runs through

it...... Well took off running for the river so I took off after him

and so (almost 4) didn't know where I was so when I go back, he was

crying. I got him to stop, then went into garage to get garden tool box, 30

sec maybe, took off the other way running through the woods about 1

foot from a 25 foot drop off to the river, I take chase and crying. got him

(he is quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt while and I

plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always have to pay

attention to " then gets up and walks into flower bed and

starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and yelled " stop

it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the worst part...I think I

really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I know how awful

that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking it.....I never should have

yelled. really is a great boy. Its was just between chasing him and

being upset, I just lost it. I guess the reality of this being a life

time issue that isn't going away over night has hit me. I know I shouldn't

expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when I planned to

become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth it. I normally

am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies because the time with

the boys is so wonderful.......

>

> Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder if

after all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to a

different safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload of money

on fences.

>

>

[Guest guest]

. That is not awful. That is life. Fencing is truly a life saver.

We just purchased new better fencing for our new house. Luckily, we got a

grant through our county for a thousand dollars and we are making that

amount work for us. Maybe you could check into something like that. Also,

make double sure that anything you plant is benign if it is going to be in

the fenced in area. I know there are a LOT of plants and shrubs that can

make you sick if you ingest them. Take care,

Tamara

mom to Ebony, 5 years old, asd, adhd, bipolar

and , 2, polish (lol)

wife to Terry

>

>Reply-To: parenting_autism

>To: parenting_autism >

>Subject: I am such an awful person

>Date: Sun, 4 May 2003 13:00:39 -0400

>

>We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where DH is

>building our house. We have been working on the land part for several

>years, so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a river runs

>through it...... Well took off running for the river so I took off

>after him and so (almost 4) didn't know where I was so when I go

>back, he was crying. I got him to stop, then went into garage to get garden

>tool box, 30 sec maybe, took off the other way running through the

>woods about 1 foot from a 25 foot drop off to the river, I take chase and

>crying. got him (he is quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt

>while and I plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always

>have to pay attention to " then gets up and walks into flower

>bed and starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and yelled

> " stop it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the worst part...I

>think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I know how

>awful that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking it.....I never

>should have yelled. really is a great boy. Its was just between

>chasing him and being upset, I just lost it. I guess the reality of

>this being a life time issue that isn't going away over night has hit me. I

>know I shouldn't expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when

>I planned to become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth

>it. I normally am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies

>because the time with the boys is so wonderful.......

>

>Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder if after

>all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to a different

>safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload of money on fences.

_________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

. That is not awful. That is life. Fencing is truly a life saver.

We just purchased new better fencing for our new house. Luckily, we got a

grant through our county for a thousand dollars and we are making that

amount work for us. Maybe you could check into something like that. Also,

make double sure that anything you plant is benign if it is going to be in

the fenced in area. I know there are a LOT of plants and shrubs that can

make you sick if you ingest them. Take care,

Tamara

mom to Ebony, 5 years old, asd, adhd, bipolar

and , 2, polish (lol)

wife to Terry

>

>Reply-To: parenting_autism

>To: parenting_autism >

>Subject: I am such an awful person

>Date: Sun, 4 May 2003 13:00:39 -0400

>

>We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where DH is

>building our house. We have been working on the land part for several

>years, so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a river runs

>through it...... Well took off running for the river so I took off

>after him and so (almost 4) didn't know where I was so when I go

>back, he was crying. I got him to stop, then went into garage to get garden

>tool box, 30 sec maybe, took off the other way running through the

>woods about 1 foot from a 25 foot drop off to the river, I take chase and

>crying. got him (he is quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt

>while and I plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always

>have to pay attention to " then gets up and walks into flower

>bed and starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and yelled

> " stop it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the worst part...I

>think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I know how

>awful that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking it.....I never

>should have yelled. really is a great boy. Its was just between

>chasing him and being upset, I just lost it. I guess the reality of

>this being a life time issue that isn't going away over night has hit me. I

>know I shouldn't expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when

>I planned to become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth

>it. I normally am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies

>because the time with the boys is so wonderful.......

>

>Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder if after

>all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to a different

>safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload of money on fences.

_________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

>>Luckily, we got a grant through our county << Thanks, I had no idea that there

were grants for such things. My Case manager is on her Honeymoon, who else would

I ask? Thanks in advance for any help

Warm Regards

& ASD 11/25/00 in Maine

I am such an awful person

>Date: Sun, 4 May 2003 13:00:39 -0400

>

>We (my boys and I) went to do some gardening on the property where DH is

>building our house. We have been working on the land part for several

>years, so I have flower beds and a veggie garden etc. Also a river runs

>through it...... Well took off running for the river so I took off

>after him and so (almost 4) didn't know where I was so when I go

>back, he was crying. I got him to stop, then went into garage to get garden

>tool box, 30 sec maybe, took off the other way running through the

>woods about 1 foot from a 25 foot drop off to the river, I take chase and

>crying. got him (he is quick I must say)... happily playing in dirt

>while and I plant a few flowers and says " Mom why do you always

>have to pay attention to " then gets up and walks into flower

>bed and starts picking the petals off the flowers....I got upset and yelled

> " stop it " he started crying a big heartbroken cry......the worst part...I

>think I really wanted to yell " stop it, stop being autistic " ....I know how

>awful that sounds and I feel so badly for even thinking it.....I never

>should have yelled. really is a great boy. Its was just between

>chasing him and being upset, I just lost it. I guess the reality of

>this being a life time issue that isn't going away over night has hit me. I

>know I shouldn't expect to be able to do things like gardening. I knew when

>I planned to become a mother that I had to give up things and it is worth

>it. I normally am not bothered by not doing some of the adult hobbies

>because the time with the boys is so wonderful.......

>

>Ok I am just rambling trying to excuse my behavior........I wonder if after

>all the years of planning if we are going to have to move to a different

>safer piece of land..I hope I can just spend a sh*tload of money on fences.

_________________________________________________________________

Protect your PC - get McAfee.com VirusScan Online

http://clinic.mcafee.com/clinic/ibuy/campaign.asp?cid=3963