Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 This really DID happen to a friend of mine, and she was big! They had a power surge or something. They had to call the fire station! LOL!!! Thanks for the giggle! I needed it! Love Lana --- In ceda , " concreteangel " > > And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 This really DID happen to a friend of mine, and she was big! They had a power surge or something. They had to call the fire station! LOL!!! Thanks for the giggle! I needed it! Love Lana --- In ceda , " concreteangel " > > And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 TJ Thanks so much for the smile. Betty For women only > > > > > > Power Outage > > > > I know my memory's fading. I actually kept my mammogram appointment. I chose a seat next to a man and his wife in the waiting room. Both the chairs and conversations were so comfortable that before long I'd totally forgotten why I was there and asked the man. " So...what are you here for? " > > > > Talk about a show stopper. Dead silence, just as " Nurse Ratchet " announced my name in her best baritone voice. I thought, " Great..a name to match the idiot. " > > > > I rushed past the giggles and hurried after the angel of no mercy. Rounding the corner, I was met with, " Hi! I'm Belinda! " This perky clipboard carrier smiled from ear to ear, tilted her head to one side and crooned, " Allll I need you to do is step into this room right hereee, strip to the waist, thennnn slip on this gown. Everything clearrrr? " > > > > I'm thinking, " Belinda...try decaf. This ain't rocket science. " Belinda skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors. Call me crazy, but I suspect a man invented this machine. It takes a perfectly healthy cup size of 36-B to a size 38-LONG in less than 60 seconds. Also, girls aren't made of sugar and spice and everything nice...it's Spandex. We can be stretched, pulled and twisted over a cold 4-inch piece of square glass and still pop back into shape. > > > > With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left and said, " Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and move in a tad so we can get everything? " Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised and out of air, so why not use the remaining circulation in my legs and neck and finish me off? > > > > My body was in a holding pattern that defied gravity when we heard, then felt, " zap! " Complete darkness. " What? " I yelled. " Oh, maintenance is working. Bet they hit a snag. " > > > > Belinda headed for the door. " Excuse me! You're not leaving are you? " I shouted. Belinda kept going and said, " Oh, you fussy puppy.... the door's wide open so you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be righttttt backkkk! " > > > > Before I could shout " NO! " , she disappeared. And that's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire, found me, half-naked and parts of me dangling from the Jaws of Life. After exchanging polite, " Hi, how's it going, " type greetings, Bubba (or possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was off. > > > > Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as possible. " Uh, yes...yes, we did, thanks. " > > > > " You bet, take care, " Bubba replied and waved good-bye as though we'd been standing in the line at the grocery store. > > > > Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin and making no attempt to suppress her amusement, she said. " Oh, I am soooo sorry! The power came back on and I so totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to lunch. Are we upset? " > > > > And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 TJ Thanks so much for the smile. Betty For women only > > > > > > Power Outage > > > > I know my memory's fading. I actually kept my mammogram appointment. I chose a seat next to a man and his wife in the waiting room. Both the chairs and conversations were so comfortable that before long I'd totally forgotten why I was there and asked the man. " So...what are you here for? " > > > > Talk about a show stopper. Dead silence, just as " Nurse Ratchet " announced my name in her best baritone voice. I thought, " Great..a name to match the idiot. " > > > > I rushed past the giggles and hurried after the angel of no mercy. Rounding the corner, I was met with, " Hi! I'm Belinda! " This perky clipboard carrier smiled from ear to ear, tilted her head to one side and crooned, " Allll I need you to do is step into this room right hereee, strip to the waist, thennnn slip on this gown. Everything clearrrr? " > > > > I'm thinking, " Belinda...try decaf. This ain't rocket science. " Belinda skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors. Call me crazy, but I suspect a man invented this machine. It takes a perfectly healthy cup size of 36-B to a size 38-LONG in less than 60 seconds. Also, girls aren't made of sugar and spice and everything nice...it's Spandex. We can be stretched, pulled and twisted over a cold 4-inch piece of square glass and still pop back into shape. > > > > With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left and said, " Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and move in a tad so we can get everything? " Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised and out of air, so why not use the remaining circulation in my legs and neck and finish me off? > > > > My body was in a holding pattern that defied gravity when we heard, then felt, " zap! " Complete darkness. " What? " I yelled. " Oh, maintenance is working. Bet they hit a snag. " > > > > Belinda headed for the door. " Excuse me! You're not leaving are you? " I shouted. Belinda kept going and said, " Oh, you fussy puppy.... the door's wide open so you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be righttttt backkkk! " > > > > Before I could shout " NO! " , she disappeared. And that's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire, found me, half-naked and parts of me dangling from the Jaws of Life. After exchanging polite, " Hi, how's it going, " type greetings, Bubba (or possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was off. > > > > Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as possible. " Uh, yes...yes, we did, thanks. " > > > > " You bet, take care, " Bubba replied and waved good-bye as though we'd been standing in the line at the grocery store. > > > > Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin and making no attempt to suppress her amusement, she said. " Oh, I am soooo sorry! The power came back on and I so totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to lunch. Are we upset? " > > > > And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 Oh TJ, that is brilliant!! Thank you for the giggle!! Love....Jo x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 Oh TJ, that is brilliant!! Thank you for the giggle!! Love....Jo x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 TJ -- Thanks - this truly made me laugh!!!!!!! Love, Patti For women only Power Outage And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 2, 2004 Report Share Posted July 2, 2004 TJ -- Thanks - this truly made me laugh!!!!!!! Love, Patti For women only Power Outage And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 3, 2004 Report Share Posted July 3, 2004 In a message dated 7/2/2004 4:32:42 PM Eastern Daylight Time, concreteangel@... writes: Power Outage I know my memory's fading. I actually kept my mammogram appointment. I chose a seat next to a man and his wife in the waiting room. Both the chairs and conversations were so comfortable that before long I'd totally forgotten why I was there and asked the man. " So...what are you here for? " Talk about a show stopper. Dead silence, just as " Nurse Ratchet " announced my name in her best baritone voice. I thought, " Great..a name to match the idiot. " I rushed past the giggles and hurried after the angel of no mercy. Rounding the corner, I was met with, " Hi! I'm Belinda! " This perky clipboard carrier smiled from ear to ear, tilted her head to one side and crooned, " Allll I need you to do is step into this room right hereee, strip to the waist, thennnn slip on this gown. Everything clearrrr? " I'm thinking, " Belinda...try decaf. This ain't rocket science. " Belinda skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors. Call me crazy, but I suspect a man invented this machine. It takes a perfectly healthy cup size of 36-B to a size 38-LONG in less than 60 seconds. Also, girls aren't made of sugar and spice and everything nice...it's Spandex. We can be stretched, pulled and twisted over a cold 4-inch piece of square glass and still pop back into shape. With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left and said, " Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and move in a tad so we can get everything? " Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised and out of air, so why not use the remaining circulation in my legs and neck and finish me off? My body was in a holding pattern that defied gravity when we heard, then felt, " zap! " Complete darkness. " What? " I yelled. " Oh, maintenance is working. Bet they hit a snag. " Belinda headed for the door. " Excuse me! You're not leaving are you? " I shouted. Belinda kept going and said, " Oh, you fussy puppy.... the door's wide open so you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be righttttt backkkk! " Before I could shout " NO! " , she disappeared. And that's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire, found me, half-naked and parts of me dangling from the Jaws of Life. After exchanging polite, " Hi, how's it going, " type greetings, Bubba (or possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was off. Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as possible. " Uh, yes...yes, we did, thanks. " " You bet, take care, " Bubba replied and waved good-bye as though we'd been standing in the line at the grocery store. Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin and making no attempt to suppress her amusement, she said. " Oh, I am soooo sorry! The power came back on and I so totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to lunch. Are we upset? " And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps... And my Dr. keeps yelling at me, asking why I haven't gone in several years. The last time, was @ 6 months after a shoulder reconstruction. The pain was so bad (and I've been thru 50 operations, with very little difficulty), I pretty much passed out. I'd like to see the guys who write these RX's or Bubba, put his/their " thing " that sticks out, anywhere for 5-6 or so inches (get my point???) into one of those machines!!!!!! Hope it goes better for you next time. Luv, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 6, 2004 Report Share Posted July 6, 2004 Yikes - she left you in the mammogram machine for TWO hours???? Oh my.... and on tippetoe....yet... Can you say lawsuit for neglect??? Re: For women only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 6, 2004 Report Share Posted July 6, 2004 Yikes - she left you in the mammogram machine for TWO hours???? Oh my.... and on tippetoe....yet... Can you say lawsuit for neglect??? Re: For women only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 6, 2004 Report Share Posted July 6, 2004 never mind my last post on this topic....I'm reading emails backwards in time... doh!!! For women only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 6, 2004 Report Share Posted July 6, 2004 never mind my last post on this topic....I'm reading emails backwards in time... doh!!! For women only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 6, 2004 Report Share Posted July 6, 2004 he he he lol - Hugsssss girl-------- have missed you !!!!!!! Re: For women only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 6, 2004 Report Share Posted July 6, 2004 he he he lol - Hugsssss girl-------- have missed you !!!!!!! Re: For women only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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