Mark! ! A special Thank you!!! Long

[Guest guest]

Mark:

A month or more ago you supplied Aase Marit with some web addresses to

search her relatives in the U.S. Well, I took a long look through those

sites and their links and realized that it was worth a try searching for

my husband's biological family. The previous week my dtr. had her

geneticist visit and confirmation of HEDS diagnosis. Geneticist had

asked if there was any possibility of finding family and obtaining

medical history for my husband. He was adopted in 1946 when Jane, his

natural mother (born in Newfoundland) died of T.B. in Montreal, Que. My

husband is now in his sixties, and when his adoption mother died in

1986, we found his original baptismal certificate with the Adoption

Judgement as well as a photo card printed with info for her funeral.

Using the links provided by the rootsweb site I was able to find an

excellent genealogy web site for Newfoundland Canada, lots detailed

information posted. With continuous effort over time I was able to find

one Jane with correct last name and exact DOB, her siblings and parent

names in the 1921 Newfoundland census (transcribed on the site). By

further searching of numerous obituaries on this NFLD site I found what

seemed to be the obituary of his aunt and the names of his cousins. The

obituary indicated the cousins lived in Toronto and since the last names

were not very common with only a few telephone book listings, I was able

to follow up with phone calls.

The result is that we found what I believed to be 3 biological cousins

living within approx an hour's drive of us.

I was exceedingly anxious about making this contact out of the blue and

what issues I might be stirring up or if I would be creating a huge

upset for this family. My one consoling thought was that societal

attitudes re illegitimacy had changed hugely since 1944. I phoned,

explaining that my husband was searching his Newfoundland roots and

providing the name of his mother, her birth place etc. Yes they were

very surprised to hear from someone who thought he could be a 1st

cousin, but also extremely receptive. They knew immediately who my

husband was and were absolutely overjoyed to hear from this long lost

cousin and searched for grandson. They even knew his baptismal name and

kept repeating, " Oh, this is good news! Oh, this is good news! We had

thought that we would never learn his whereabouts. " It turns out my

husband's grandmother had even hired a private detective to search for

him after Jane (his mother's death and that she went to her grave

grieving the loss of Jane's boy. The cousins reiterated how happy their

beloved grandmother would be to know Jane's boy was found. This all

tumbled out on the first phone call, almost immediately, and could not

have been contrived. No doubt we were blown out of the water and my

husband was so deeply touched and overjoyed to have some answers to life

long questions. His perception was that his natural family could not

have cared about him and has always felt so " abandoned " . I know this

sounds like something out of a novel, and this kind of thing just does

not happen to regular people....but it has! ! ! ! ! Mark, we owe you a

huge debt of gratitude for posting those genealogy sites and your basic

suggestions to Aase, and my husband is ever so grateful. It had never

occurred to us that genealogy sites like this existed with so much info

posted on the web...others genealogists had searched the surname and

posted their uncovered info. No other sites I looked at had so

liberally provided detailed info as this NFLD site So...that is why I

have not been on the list for a month or so. A lot of this almost seems

more than coincidence, but who knows?

We are now at the point of obtaining medical history for my husband and

informing these people about HEDS and our daughter's symptoms. Yes,

there have been 4 very early deaths of 1st cousins, ALL IN ONE FAMILY,

but three of these young people, dying in their 20's, also had autism

severe enough to require institutionalization. The 4th 1st cousin in

this family was very healthy and active but after her first year of

rigorous training in the army (heavy artillery division) developed a

motor neuron disease that progressed very quickly and she died at 24.

Does this fit with HEDS.. am totally unsure? Does anyone have any idea?

However, these 3 female cousins(40's & 50's) we contact have severe

Raynauds and intolerance of extremes of cold and heat plus one with

severe joint pain problems, notably the wrist. We have had to go slowly

with seeking the medical info and will try to move at their pace though

there is definite interest from them re my knowledge and experience as a

couple of these cousin's kids have fine motor delays and learning

difficulties. I have offered my support since I know this road well.

Mark, you just can't know how much your pieces of information and

suggestions opened this window for my husband. Additionally, we learned

a huge amt about Newfoundland through the search and gained a huge

respect for the struggles of the Newfoundland people through tough

years and especially with the collapse of the fishery and demise of the

cod stocks..

THANK YOU AGAIN! ! ! !

Bernie