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oh yeah? (funny)

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Thanks to all my friends who have sent me such important emails in

2004! It's so wonderful that you

included me in your quest to inform!

Because of all of you:

I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out that it's good for removing

toilet stains.

I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with

AIDS.

I smell awful, but thank goodness I stopped using deodorants because they

cause cancer.

I don't leave my car in any parking lot even though I

sometimes have to walk about seven blocks, for fear that someone might

drug me with a perfume

sample and then try to rob me.

I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they will ask me to dial a

stupid number and then I

get a phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

I stopped consuming several foods for fear that the estrogen they contain

may turn me gay.

I also stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because they are nothing more

than horrible mutant

freaks with no eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places

like Mc's can sell their

Big Macs.

I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick

from the rat feces and urine.

When I go to parties, I now don't mix with anybody, for fear that someone

will take my kidneys and

leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

I donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. That poor sick girl that

was about to die in

the hospital.. Funny thing, she never seems to get any older.

I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made,

expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were

supposed to send me when I participated in their special email

program.

It's weird, though, that my new free cell phone never arrived, and neither

did the passes for my paid

vacation to Disneyland.

But I am positive that all this is because of the chain I broke or forgot to

follow and I got a

curse from hell.

IMPORTANT NOTE:

If you don't send this email to at least 1200 people in the next ten

seconds, a bird will crap on you

today at 7:00 PM. And I'm not kidding!

~~~~~~~~

LOL

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