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/Re: overdoing it

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Oh ,THank you for your message...WHat are you doing up at 4:00

am...which in CAlifornia is what 3am? Get to bed! ha! First off -

I am still in shock over your daughters assault. I also have a 7

year old daughter. I am really proud of your determination to make

it right. You keep going with strength and wisdom from GOd. I am

praying for you and your family.

On to our " families " outside of my own home and how they " percieve "

my Lupus....well, all I can say is I am with you girl...

I have had this lupus for 3 years. During that time, My father

passed away from Luekiemia. I have a sister who is a parapalygic.

SHe is completely paralyzed from the waist down and is in a

wheelchair full-time. SHe is a vital active beautiful mother and

wife in spite of that situation.

HOWEVER, I laugh a joke and say " that in my family you have to

either be dead or paralyzed to get any sympathy. " In short no, my

mom and sisters and most of my friends are used to me being active

and the strong one, that they act like I am sooooo weak when I get

sick. Or, that maybe I am " just depressed about my father's death " ,

or " Faking, cuz' I dont look sick " ...or " not dealing with the

stresses of 3 children by " just going to bed " for a week " ! They

even get angry when I am ill because somehow it scares them I

think. I mean, if " the rock " of the group gets really sick...then

who will be there to help them (seems so selfish, but they do that).

I have heard and seen them all...the attitudes that is.

My mother-in-law, on the other hand acts like " I am ALWAYS

sick....She even writes it up in her Christmas newsletters, and

mostly acts like I am an incompetent human " . As if somehow getting

lupus has given her son a raw-deal.

The irony of it all is that if I ever ask any of these folks to

define what lupus is...they can't. Maybe they are in some form of

denial, but it sure doesnt help those of us with lupus.

I think you are right that when you feel good you should LIVE. But

focus on my kiddos and hubby...not the cleanliness of my home. Ha!

I dont want to get sick by over doing it. But I dont want to miss

out on life with my family and there is not much excitiement laying

in bed trying to beat a flare. Take care of yourself during this

difficult time for you. Please keep in touch if you have the time.

THanks a bunch-

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