Guest guest Posted August 18, 2002 Report Share Posted August 18, 2002 I read these accounts and immediately tried to start brainstorming of ways that might help, but quickly realized, there wasn't much I could say except, I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this, and we're here for you. It's hard to be in pain and have someone refuse to respect that. Hugs Darcy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 20, 2002 Report Share Posted August 20, 2002 Suzi wrote,> I am sorry that you are going through this. Some times I > think that I would love to tell my husband that he has to do the shopping > for food and take the kids to the docs. Then I wouldn't need a penny to my > name. He would have to control absolutely everything. > > He has now changed his mind. On the way home from taking my books to > storage, he was listening to the radio. Probably Public Radio as that is > what I have my car set on. They were discussing the very same problem that > we facing. The person doing the discussing said that doing what wanted to > do was wrong. It would only make things worse and it would ruin the > relationship. He actually decided that it made sense and he came home and > told me about it and he has also quit getting mad over every thing and > yelling. How long that will last, I don't know. I do know that the one > time he has got mad, I told him that he was not to talk to like that and he > was not to yell. I was not going to put up with it anymore. So far, so > good. ````````````````````````````` > I read over and over that we must learn to reduce our stress. It's all up > to us. We can choose how we will react to other people. That's easier > said than done! I agree. But I am trying to stop reacting to him and maybe that will work. Because I have been in a very bad flare and those three days of arguing and yelling has made me far worse and I had two bad falls yesterday and of course, that didn't help. > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~` > I think the biggest concern I have right now is the idea that if I > become too sick I wouldn't be able to take care of myself if I had to. There is that too. I will be 66 in October. I could not get a job if I was even able to work. I do have my daughter next door to help me if I got really bad but I like to Duff to help me. We have been married 48 years and you just don't throw that away. > > Take care, Irene Books may well be the only true magic Alice Hoffman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 20, 2002 Report Share Posted August 20, 2002 Suzi wrote,> I am sorry that you are going through this. Some times I > think that I would love to tell my husband that he has to do the shopping > for food and take the kids to the docs. Then I wouldn't need a penny to my > name. He would have to control absolutely everything. > > He has now changed his mind. On the way home from taking my books to > storage, he was listening to the radio. Probably Public Radio as that is > what I have my car set on. They were discussing the very same problem that > we facing. The person doing the discussing said that doing what wanted to > do was wrong. It would only make things worse and it would ruin the > relationship. He actually decided that it made sense and he came home and > told me about it and he has also quit getting mad over every thing and > yelling. How long that will last, I don't know. I do know that the one > time he has got mad, I told him that he was not to talk to like that and he > was not to yell. I was not going to put up with it anymore. So far, so > good. ````````````````````````````` > I read over and over that we must learn to reduce our stress. It's all up > to us. We can choose how we will react to other people. That's easier > said than done! I agree. But I am trying to stop reacting to him and maybe that will work. Because I have been in a very bad flare and those three days of arguing and yelling has made me far worse and I had two bad falls yesterday and of course, that didn't help. > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~` > I think the biggest concern I have right now is the idea that if I > become too sick I wouldn't be able to take care of myself if I had to. There is that too. I will be 66 in October. I could not get a job if I was even able to work. I do have my daughter next door to help me if I got really bad but I like to Duff to help me. We have been married 48 years and you just don't throw that away. > > Take care, Irene Books may well be the only true magic Alice Hoffman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 20, 2002 Report Share Posted August 20, 2002 Suzi wrote,> I am sorry that you are going through this. Some times I > think that I would love to tell my husband that he has to do the shopping > for food and take the kids to the docs. Then I wouldn't need a penny to my > name. He would have to control absolutely everything. > > He has now changed his mind. On the way home from taking my books to > storage, he was listening to the radio. Probably Public Radio as that is > what I have my car set on. They were discussing the very same problem that > we facing. The person doing the discussing said that doing what wanted to > do was wrong. It would only make things worse and it would ruin the > relationship. He actually decided that it made sense and he came home and > told me about it and he has also quit getting mad over every thing and > yelling. How long that will last, I don't know. I do know that the one > time he has got mad, I told him that he was not to talk to like that and he > was not to yell. I was not going to put up with it anymore. So far, so > good. ````````````````````````````` > I read over and over that we must learn to reduce our stress. It's all up > to us. We can choose how we will react to other people. That's easier > said than done! I agree. But I am trying to stop reacting to him and maybe that will work. Because I have been in a very bad flare and those three days of arguing and yelling has made me far worse and I had two bad falls yesterday and of course, that didn't help. > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~` > I think the biggest concern I have right now is the idea that if I > become too sick I wouldn't be able to take care of myself if I had to. There is that too. I will be 66 in October. I could not get a job if I was even able to work. I do have my daughter next door to help me if I got really bad but I like to Duff to help me. We have been married 48 years and you just don't throw that away. > > Take care, Irene Books may well be the only true magic Alice Hoffman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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