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,

I have felt this way soooo many times! My husband is so great all of the time,

but every once in a while, he gets really down. We were dating only five

months, when I first got sick. We've been together four - married three of

those. So, he only knows the sick me for the most part. So, that says a lot

about what kind of man he is - just to stick around. Sounds like yours is

somewhat the same.

I always aplogize for being sick - especially when I'm in the hospital or really

sick. I just keep saying, " I'm sorry. " He just tells me to stop and that he

loves me no matter how sick I am. I have to try and put myself in his shoes

sometimes just to check myself. I can't imagine hearing the griping, moaning

and groaning that he tolerates when I'm feeling bad (which seems to be quite a

bit).

Anyways, I sympathize with the day you're having, and I hate that you're

depressed. The only way I usually get out of these slumps is to start thanking

God for the life that I do have - without this life, I would never have met my

wonderful husband, and I never would have had my two wonderful little angels!!

Wishing you a much better day - and one without pain!

in KY

tuck9906 wrote:Hi All!

I'm so depressed I guess I need to vent. Went to pain managemnet the

first time Thursday, gave me new meds and they make me feel like

crap. I was talking to my husband who has been so very supportive.

Instead of my usual wonderful husband this morning he was real snippy

and said he just wants his wife back. I guess I can't blame him, I

want me back too! I'm so sick of feeling this way, of cheating my

husband out of a semi-normal wife and of having a life. Does it ever

get better? What do you do when you want to give up? thanks for

letting me vent.

P

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,

I have felt this way soooo many times! My husband is so great all of the time,

but every once in a while, he gets really down. We were dating only five

months, when I first got sick. We've been together four - married three of

those. So, he only knows the sick me for the most part. So, that says a lot

about what kind of man he is - just to stick around. Sounds like yours is

somewhat the same.

I always aplogize for being sick - especially when I'm in the hospital or really

sick. I just keep saying, " I'm sorry. " He just tells me to stop and that he

loves me no matter how sick I am. I have to try and put myself in his shoes

sometimes just to check myself. I can't imagine hearing the griping, moaning

and groaning that he tolerates when I'm feeling bad (which seems to be quite a

bit).

Anyways, I sympathize with the day you're having, and I hate that you're

depressed. The only way I usually get out of these slumps is to start thanking

God for the life that I do have - without this life, I would never have met my

wonderful husband, and I never would have had my two wonderful little angels!!

Wishing you a much better day - and one without pain!

in KY

tuck9906 wrote:Hi All!

I'm so depressed I guess I need to vent. Went to pain managemnet the

first time Thursday, gave me new meds and they make me feel like

crap. I was talking to my husband who has been so very supportive.

Instead of my usual wonderful husband this morning he was real snippy

and said he just wants his wife back. I guess I can't blame him, I

want me back too! I'm so sick of feeling this way, of cheating my

husband out of a semi-normal wife and of having a life. Does it ever

get better? What do you do when you want to give up? thanks for

letting me vent.

P

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,

I have felt this way soooo many times! My husband is so great all of the time,

but every once in a while, he gets really down. We were dating only five

months, when I first got sick. We've been together four - married three of

those. So, he only knows the sick me for the most part. So, that says a lot

about what kind of man he is - just to stick around. Sounds like yours is

somewhat the same.

I always aplogize for being sick - especially when I'm in the hospital or really

sick. I just keep saying, " I'm sorry. " He just tells me to stop and that he

loves me no matter how sick I am. I have to try and put myself in his shoes

sometimes just to check myself. I can't imagine hearing the griping, moaning

and groaning that he tolerates when I'm feeling bad (which seems to be quite a

bit).

Anyways, I sympathize with the day you're having, and I hate that you're

depressed. The only way I usually get out of these slumps is to start thanking

God for the life that I do have - without this life, I would never have met my

wonderful husband, and I never would have had my two wonderful little angels!!

Wishing you a much better day - and one without pain!

in KY

tuck9906 wrote:Hi All!

I'm so depressed I guess I need to vent. Went to pain managemnet the

first time Thursday, gave me new meds and they make me feel like

crap. I was talking to my husband who has been so very supportive.

Instead of my usual wonderful husband this morning he was real snippy

and said he just wants his wife back. I guess I can't blame him, I

want me back too! I'm so sick of feeling this way, of cheating my

husband out of a semi-normal wife and of having a life. Does it ever

get better? What do you do when you want to give up? thanks for

letting me vent.

P

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  • 1 year later...

You

explained that so well ! That is so true! We must grieve for our old

selves. I went through that when my lupus was dxed and I got real sick. I

adjusted and cut my work hours, got meds and tried to get a handle on my anger.

After my cancer made me so sick and I got Fibro and arthritis I had a real,

real long grieving process! I still get depressed and angry but not as often. I

too have spend many hours trying to avoid the bed (it was calling out to me) some days I hate to get up. Almost every night

I hate to try to sleep, the pain gets worse and I toss and turn.

From: Carey

Sent: Thursday, July 29, 2004 9:30

AM

To: LUPIES

Subject: TO MEG AND LISA/

DEPRESSED

, and Meg,

I think

we all go through this ......I refer to it as grieving for a lost loved one,

" ..OUR OLD SELVES " we tend to go through the grieving process

as if we have lost a loved one, and in a sense we have.

I

will go through all the different aspects....disbelief, anger, pain,

depression, and then finally to a sort of Peace .....and in this state we are

finally able to survive and go on even though some days are harder than

others......You are going to find a few really good days to look back on .

I also

find it helpful to remember and cherish the times when I still had the

" OLD ME " instead of grieving for them.

I still

have days like you describe......just spending the whole day yearning for

bedtime when i can sleep and forget .

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