Guest guest Posted July 28, 2004 Report Share Posted July 28, 2004 Meg, Does your doctor have you on any antidepressant? If not, why not? Have you talked to him/her about that? Sounds to me like you are having signs of clinical depression, and that is a part of this disease. Also, the isolation feelings you are describing are part and parcel of depression and so is a lot of the fatigue...lack of sound sleep (even if you are not aware that you are not really getting sound sleep) leads to more pain and fatigue which lead to clinical depression which lead back to more pain and fatigue which lead to lack of restful sleep, etc. etc. ad infinitum ad nauseum. It forms a cycle that spirals downward until it is beyond your ability to help yourself and you need to ask for help from your doctors. Do not hesitate another day, call the doctor and get help NOW! I know, you apologized for going on about this in your post, but honey, we love you, and we want you to get all you can out of life. Existing just to exist isn't living, and it isn't necessary even when we are in bad flares. There are ways to beat the depression, ways to get the rest we need, and ways to socialize in spite of physical limitations. So, young lady, listen to Auntie "M", here, and call the doctor post haste, and then let us know how things are going for you. Writing to the group can be very helpful, and we are here for you 24/7 dearie, you can't get rid of us easily, ya know. LOL Loving hugs, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 28, 2004 Report Share Posted July 28, 2004 Meg, Does your doctor have you on any antidepressant? If not, why not? Have you talked to him/her about that? Sounds to me like you are having signs of clinical depression, and that is a part of this disease. Also, the isolation feelings you are describing are part and parcel of depression and so is a lot of the fatigue...lack of sound sleep (even if you are not aware that you are not really getting sound sleep) leads to more pain and fatigue which lead to clinical depression which lead back to more pain and fatigue which lead to lack of restful sleep, etc. etc. ad infinitum ad nauseum. It forms a cycle that spirals downward until it is beyond your ability to help yourself and you need to ask for help from your doctors. Do not hesitate another day, call the doctor and get help NOW! I know, you apologized for going on about this in your post, but honey, we love you, and we want you to get all you can out of life. Existing just to exist isn't living, and it isn't necessary even when we are in bad flares. There are ways to beat the depression, ways to get the rest we need, and ways to socialize in spite of physical limitations. So, young lady, listen to Auntie "M", here, and call the doctor post haste, and then let us know how things are going for you. Writing to the group can be very helpful, and we are here for you 24/7 dearie, you can't get rid of us easily, ya know. LOL Loving hugs, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2004 Report Share Posted July 29, 2004 Meg, I'm in the SAME boat as you. I starting going through this depression stage lately AGAIN. It's the same saying " Sick and tired of BEING sick and tired. " I just went to a church picnic this last Sat. and I couldn't stay (after 4 hrs.)...I couldn't even go on the boat and have fun on the raft-type pully-things they had. Lacey, my daughter, had a blast. She kept begging me to go with her and it hurt me so bad to say no. Usually, in my pre-Lupus days, I was the first one out having fun...now the only fun I have is laying down in my bedroom. This is a horrible disease and I wish that A LOT of these doctors would see how it feels THEN (and ONLY THEN) will they prescribe the meds we need (or give us samples to offset the HIGH costs of meds). Meg you are not alone...keep writing here and we will get through this together. Blessings, In Cali > Hi everyone > > I havent been online in awhile....been pretty sick and feeling kind > of depressed. Wondering if its depression from the lupus or > depression in general? I am so damn tired all the time I cant stand > it. My doc wanted me to try a med that increases energy (provigil) > but my stupid ins company wont cover it. They will only pay for it if > you have MS or narcolepsy....they dont care that it might help little > old me get through my day. > > anyway....I am tired of being tired all the time. I am losing friends > beacuse ofthis. Recently I met a nice group of moms who get together > for play dates etc... In the beginning they always invited me, now > because I havent been able to make it to many things, I feel like > they are excluding me. I hate this so much, I feel like a teenager > again!!! I just wish for4 a day that I wake up andd feel like getting > out of bed. I dont remember what its like to look forward to the next > day. I look forward to going to bed. > > I am sorry to go on and on and sorry to have disappeared for a few > weeks. Thanks for listening. > > meg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2004 Report Share Posted July 29, 2004 Meg, I'm in the SAME boat as you. I starting going through this depression stage lately AGAIN. It's the same saying " Sick and tired of BEING sick and tired. " I just went to a church picnic this last Sat. and I couldn't stay (after 4 hrs.)...I couldn't even go on the boat and have fun on the raft-type pully-things they had. Lacey, my daughter, had a blast. She kept begging me to go with her and it hurt me so bad to say no. Usually, in my pre-Lupus days, I was the first one out having fun...now the only fun I have is laying down in my bedroom. This is a horrible disease and I wish that A LOT of these doctors would see how it feels THEN (and ONLY THEN) will they prescribe the meds we need (or give us samples to offset the HIGH costs of meds). Meg you are not alone...keep writing here and we will get through this together. Blessings, In Cali > Hi everyone > > I havent been online in awhile....been pretty sick and feeling kind > of depressed. Wondering if its depression from the lupus or > depression in general? I am so damn tired all the time I cant stand > it. My doc wanted me to try a med that increases energy (provigil) > but my stupid ins company wont cover it. They will only pay for it if > you have MS or narcolepsy....they dont care that it might help little > old me get through my day. > > anyway....I am tired of being tired all the time. I am losing friends > beacuse ofthis. Recently I met a nice group of moms who get together > for play dates etc... In the beginning they always invited me, now > because I havent been able to make it to many things, I feel like > they are excluding me. I hate this so much, I feel like a teenager > again!!! I just wish for4 a day that I wake up andd feel like getting > out of bed. I dont remember what its like to look forward to the next > day. I look forward to going to bed. > > I am sorry to go on and on and sorry to have disappeared for a few > weeks. Thanks for listening. > > meg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2004 Report Share Posted July 29, 2004 Meg, I haven't posted much in quite a while either...mainly for the same reasons. Tired of being sick & tired. The depression just goes with this disease. In fact it goes along with many diseases. My husband has Parkinson's & that was 1 of the first things his dr. did was put him on an anti-depressant after his diagnosis. That has helped him immensely. I have been so tired & depressed lately that I've ended up back on prednisone. As much as I hate the pred. it is better than being so depressed that you sit & cry all the time & being so tired that you can't move or even wake up. I take Wellbutrin XL for depression & it has helped tremendously, but when I begin to flare...can't tell I'm taking anything at all! Yesterday & today have been much better after starting back on the prednisone. So far short courses have helped me as long as I go off very gradually. And since I have to be able to take care of both of us, I have to do whatever is necessary to function. He has PD & early on-set Alzheimer's. The Provigil works for me when I need a little extra lift some days. I'm fortunate that hubby has a prescription for it that ins. does pay for. He doesn't need it very often now that they have got his meds regulated just right. So my pcp said it was ok to use it occasionally. I don't particularly look forward to bedtime lately because I'm having so much trouble sleeping. I have different meds that I've tried, but most all leave me to groggy the next day to be an effective caregiver! And have you ever noticed that when you try to sleep, the pain gets worse?! At least mine does, then I toss & turn, wake up hubby, then he can't go back to sleep (that's part of PD, it affects the sleep center in the brain). No sense in both of us not sleeping! Part of my problem is the same several on here have...limited funds due to trying to live on disability! If you can call it living. I guess surviving is a better word! And now I get to be in charge of figuring out what gets paid & what has to wait. Decisions we used to always make together. We are getting ready to have full power of attorney papers done. We have been informed that we need to do this now before his disease progresses. Stress is such a wonderful thing isn't it?! lol Sorry I missed wishing everyone a happy birthday & welcoming all the new people. , I'm so sorry about your little girl, your family is in our prayers. Deanna, , a, you all take care of yourselves. Cheryl, MM, & all the rest of you, hang in there. I read the email every day, just haven't felt like writing. I tend to withdraw when a flare begins. My 17 yr old son told me yesterday that he couldn't believe how much difference the pred. has made in a day's time. I must have been pretty unsociable lately! LOL He's the only one still home, is the quiet hold it in type, very artistic. I think this is hardest on him...being the last at home with both parents ill, watching his dad change ever so gradually from day to day. For the newbies, I'm from TN, 45 w/4 kids ages 24 - 17...2 girls & 2 boys, 3 grandsons w/ another due in October. We raise & exhibit exotic birds (parrots) Diagnosed w/lupus 2 yrs. but have had symptoms for much, much longer. I also have fibro, degenerative disc disease, disc problems in neck & lower back & scoliosis. Well, I've gone on much to long here, sorry about that. I will try to stay in touch more & I want to say how much this group means even when I'm not being sociable! LOL Everyone here is always so supportive & that's something that we all need & sometimes don't get anywhere else! aka "Bird Mama" -- depressed?? Hi everyoneI havent been online in awhile....been pretty sick and feeling kind of depressed. Wondering if its depression from the lupus or depression in general? I am so damn tired all the time I cant stand it. My doc wanted me to try a med that increases energy (provigil) but my stupid ins company wont cover it. They will only pay for it if you have MS or narcolepsy....they dont care that it might help little old me get through my day.anyway....I am tired of being tired all the time. I am losing friends beacuse ofthis. Recently I met a nice group of moms who get together for play dates etc... In the beginning they always invited me, now because I havent been able to make it to many things, I feel like they are excluding me. I hate this so much, I feel like a teenager again!!! I just wish for4 a day that I wake up andd feel like getting out of bed. I dont remember what its like to look forward to the next day. I look forward to going to bed.I am sorry to go on and on and sorry to have disappeared for a few weeks. Thanks for listening.meg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2004 Report Share Posted July 29, 2004 Meg, I haven't posted much in quite a while either...mainly for the same reasons. Tired of being sick & tired. The depression just goes with this disease. In fact it goes along with many diseases. My husband has Parkinson's & that was 1 of the first things his dr. did was put him on an anti-depressant after his diagnosis. That has helped him immensely. I have been so tired & depressed lately that I've ended up back on prednisone. As much as I hate the pred. it is better than being so depressed that you sit & cry all the time & being so tired that you can't move or even wake up. I take Wellbutrin XL for depression & it has helped tremendously, but when I begin to flare...can't tell I'm taking anything at all! Yesterday & today have been much better after starting back on the prednisone. So far short courses have helped me as long as I go off very gradually. And since I have to be able to take care of both of us, I have to do whatever is necessary to function. He has PD & early on-set Alzheimer's. The Provigil works for me when I need a little extra lift some days. I'm fortunate that hubby has a prescription for it that ins. does pay for. He doesn't need it very often now that they have got his meds regulated just right. So my pcp said it was ok to use it occasionally. I don't particularly look forward to bedtime lately because I'm having so much trouble sleeping. I have different meds that I've tried, but most all leave me to groggy the next day to be an effective caregiver! And have you ever noticed that when you try to sleep, the pain gets worse?! At least mine does, then I toss & turn, wake up hubby, then he can't go back to sleep (that's part of PD, it affects the sleep center in the brain). No sense in both of us not sleeping! Part of my problem is the same several on here have...limited funds due to trying to live on disability! If you can call it living. I guess surviving is a better word! And now I get to be in charge of figuring out what gets paid & what has to wait. Decisions we used to always make together. We are getting ready to have full power of attorney papers done. We have been informed that we need to do this now before his disease progresses. Stress is such a wonderful thing isn't it?! lol Sorry I missed wishing everyone a happy birthday & welcoming all the new people. , I'm so sorry about your little girl, your family is in our prayers. Deanna, , a, you all take care of yourselves. Cheryl, MM, & all the rest of you, hang in there. I read the email every day, just haven't felt like writing. I tend to withdraw when a flare begins. My 17 yr old son told me yesterday that he couldn't believe how much difference the pred. has made in a day's time. I must have been pretty unsociable lately! LOL He's the only one still home, is the quiet hold it in type, very artistic. I think this is hardest on him...being the last at home with both parents ill, watching his dad change ever so gradually from day to day. For the newbies, I'm from TN, 45 w/4 kids ages 24 - 17...2 girls & 2 boys, 3 grandsons w/ another due in October. We raise & exhibit exotic birds (parrots) Diagnosed w/lupus 2 yrs. but have had symptoms for much, much longer. I also have fibro, degenerative disc disease, disc problems in neck & lower back & scoliosis. Well, I've gone on much to long here, sorry about that. I will try to stay in touch more & I want to say how much this group means even when I'm not being sociable! LOL Everyone here is always so supportive & that's something that we all need & sometimes don't get anywhere else! aka "Bird Mama" -- depressed?? Hi everyoneI havent been online in awhile....been pretty sick and feeling kind of depressed. Wondering if its depression from the lupus or depression in general? I am so damn tired all the time I cant stand it. My doc wanted me to try a med that increases energy (provigil) but my stupid ins company wont cover it. They will only pay for it if you have MS or narcolepsy....they dont care that it might help little old me get through my day.anyway....I am tired of being tired all the time. I am losing friends beacuse ofthis. Recently I met a nice group of moms who get together for play dates etc... In the beginning they always invited me, now because I havent been able to make it to many things, I feel like they are excluding me. I hate this so much, I feel like a teenager again!!! I just wish for4 a day that I wake up andd feel like getting out of bed. I dont remember what its like to look forward to the next day. I look forward to going to bed.I am sorry to go on and on and sorry to have disappeared for a few weeks. Thanks for listening.meg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 29, 2004 Report Share Posted August 29, 2004 Depression is a chemical problem that goes with lupus. It is not something you can just talk yourself out of. You need depression meds and if I were you I would get them as fast as you can. I think most of us are on something. The chemical problem is also responsible for lupies not getting enough REM sleep. I know exactly what you mean about being excluded. I was recently excluded from a day trip with two of my friends. They knew I couldn’t drive that far, walk around and come home again in one day. They are right of course. I suggest you try to be more forceful and explain how you feel and tell them to please continue to invite you and not give up because you will be able to go to some things you just don’t know how you will feel from day to day. If they are friends, they will understand. From: megl2001 Sent: Wednesday, July 28, 2004 9:46 PM To: LUPIES Subject: depressed?? I am losing friends beacuse ofthis. Recently I met a nice group of moms who get together for play dates etc... In the beginning they always invited me, now because I havent been able to make it to many things, I feel like they are excluding me. I just wish for4 a day that I wake up andd feel like getting out of bed. meg Get your FREE personalized email signature at My Mail Signature! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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