Letter to normals.. no help

August 7, 2002

Thanks to the few who replied to my post. One of you suggested that

my dh read the " Letter to Normals " . The only problem w/ this is that

if you read the letter it is coming from a point of view that I don't

identify with. If you read the letter, it is from the perspective of

someone that is on the worst end of fibromyalgia. It sounds like the

speaker is almost bed ridden and can't do much at all.. not even go

out and visit anyone and needs people to visit them. I have

fibromyalgia, but not to this point. I want him to understand that I

hurt all the time, that I push myself all the time, that sometimes I

just can't do anymore because I hurt too much. I want him to be

recognize what I am going through.

Let me give you an example of what I'm dealing with. When he has the

flu, headache, whatever, he takes meds and sleeps.. in a chair or

comes to bed, closes the door, and lies down. A few months back, one

of my toddlers got the stomach flu. He got it too. He took off work

and stayed home in bed. He went back to work.. I got it. With

fibromyalgia, a 2.5 year old and a 1 year old, 102 temp. and the

runs, he thought I would be " just fine " taking care of the babies,

and didn't want to take another day off of work. This is the

sympathy I get when I'm sick. I just keep going and going..

regardless of how I feel until I can't anymore. I'm sopposed to

relax... whatever. Anyways... my point is:

If he reads the " letter to normals " .. it will only prove his point

that " I " m not that bad " . Obviously, someone w/ real pain is much

worse than me and I'm not like " this person " at all. Does anyone

have any other ideas of how I can get through to him. He thinks that

if I take a walk around the block every day my pain will be gone and

I'll be fixed. He's clueless and it's really hurting my feellings

and stressing me out. I work really hard.. part time job... 2

toddlers.. the house.. the meals... cleaning up their mess all over

the floor 4+ times a day... running them around... entertainging them

(the toddlers)....He likes to say " fibromylazia " ... like lazy when he

comes home and the toys are all over the floor because I'm simply

hurting too much to do anymore. Picking stuff off the floor all over

is just too much for me to handle. Anywayss.... someone has to have

some ideas on how to deal w/ a dh who loves me, but isn't very

sympathetic. Thanks... nne

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