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The trip to London was wonderful but it cost me dearly. I am in a lot of

pain and my pain medication is not doing its job. I can usually keep my pain

on an even level that I can cope with most of the time but I can't do that

now. I get up in pain and I go to bed in pain. I can't do anything but

spend a lot of time in bed. I don't like being in bed. I am always up even

if I can't do much but this pain is beyond me.

It is a very frightful pain and it scares me that it will stay this way or

get worse. In my mind, I know that it is a flare but my body doesn't want to

accept that. My body feels like it is going to be this horrible pain forever

and I couldn't stand that.

I have been beaten down by this pain and I really feel like that I can't

stand much more of this. I can't cope like I usually do.

Take care,

Irene

Books may well be the only true magic

Alice Hoffman

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