cute

[Guest guest]

You're

from the West Coast when...

--You make over $250,000 and

still can't afford to buy your

own house.

--The high school

quarterback calls a time-out to answer his

cell phone.

--The fastest part of your

commute is down your driveway.

--You know how to eat an

artichoke.

--You drive to your

neighborhood block party.

You're from New York when...

--You say " the

city " and expect everyone to know you mean

Manhattan.

--You have never been to the

Statue of Liberty or the Empire

State Building.

--You can get into a

four-hour argument about how to get

from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but

can't find

Wisconsin on a map.

--You think Central Park is " nature. "

--You think eye contact is

an act of aggression.

You're from Colorado when...

--You carry your $3,000

mountain bike atop your $500 car.

--You tell your husband to

pick up Granola on his way home

and he stops at the day

care.

--A pass does not involve a

football or dating.

--The top of your head is

bald, but you still have a ponytail.

--Your bridal registry is at REI.