Re: Spouses that worry

November 18, 2002

Debs,

Yeah I have a hubby that worries. He's scared to death for me. He had quit

smoking for the 3rd time since we married 12+ years ago. He was doing well for

about 3-4 months. He bought a pack of cigarettes when he got of the plane in VA

after flying there to be with me when I had the first attack (in over a year) in

July. He's been smoking ever since. I try to keep him from seeing me when the

pain is bad unless it warrants the ER. The other day my mom was over when I was

having a particularly rough day. She and I were talking and she just got quite

all of a sudden. I thought maybe she wasn't feeling well. I asked if she was

okay and she said yes. Finally I said, Mom what is wrong. she looked at me

with tears in her eyes and said I am just so worried about you. I have tears in

my eyes as I write this. Another time, my 20 year old daughter had come to the

hospital to visit me since I was in the hospital near the town where she goes to

college. She was sitting on my bed, rubbing my hand, when I noticed she was

crying. I asked her what in the world was the matter. She said she was scared

to death for me. I told her this mama was gonna be fine and had no intention of

going anywhere. I promised her I'd be around a good long time to keep making

her crazy, just like Granny does me (though I don't know what I'd without my

mom). I promised her that eventually I would get better again. Since that

time, I try to downplay things with my daughter, especially. It's a lot easier

than with my mom and hubby since she lives 2 1/2 hours away. She is only 20 for

pete's sake. She is a junior in college and works, too. She does not need to

be worrying about me! Seeing the pain and worry in the faces of my loved ones

is much more painful than the physical pain. It is one of the hardest things of

a chronic illness.

W

Spouses that worry

Arghhh

I hide my pain most of the time but he frets about me goign down

hill again especially when I have these episodes pain thats not

under control. arghhhhh

anyone else have a fretty hubby

Kind ahard tellign them its a cross between somone giving you agood

punch and a stb in th back with a knife and a sharp twist

arghhh

debs

PANCREATITIS Association, Intl.

Online e-mail group

To reply to this message hit & quot;reply & quot; or send an e-mail to:

Pancreatitis (AT) Yahoo

November 18, 2002

--

yes it is hard to see the worry in tehir faces and the tears. I also

downplay it alot

I dont often complain at all now as he is petrified I will end up in

hosital for yet anotehr 2 months that was helll it was liek prison

no way out I couldnt throw a tanty and leave beacuse I had do many

machien hooke dup and every day i wanted to !!!!!

I have learnt patience but it kills me

Its really only my mum that can see me at my worst ans she frest

thought she would lose me many time sover these last 3 1/2 years

I never thought that but everyoen who looke din my eys did. I left

the first time and after I receovered with my jtube and feeding and

about a month later i broke down every day cos I realise they saw

death in my eyes and I realised I almost died by teh way they were

looking at me I was in shock took awhiel to come out of taht

I dont knwo what I would do without my my mum I would eb dead for

sure she raised merry hell for 3 months once when I wa sin hospital

she had them all running mind you one time I ran into the corridor

to the bathroom and screamed I was going to die I wa sin so much

pain. The pic lien was clogged and I hadnt had pain relief via a

pump for 24 hours . She yelled and cussed and every anesthetist came

running . They gave me enough morphien to kill 6 people then got the

pump back. Then she went up to the CEO's office and swore at him and

said he better sort out all th ecrap because she wasnt goign to

allow me to die in here due to negligence

so without her I knwo I would have died she sat at my bedside for 3

months holding my hand and for that I will be forever grateful

my mum an dme are so close

debs

- In pancreatitis@y..., " Weston " wrote:

> Debs,

> Yeah I have a hubby that worries. He's scared to death for me.

He had quit smoking for the 3rd time since we married 12+ years

ago. He was doing well for about 3-4 months. He bought a pack of

cigarettes when he got of the plane in VA after flying there to be

with me when I had the first attack (in over a year) in July. He's

been smoking ever since. I try to keep him from seeing me when the

pain is bad unless it warrants the ER. The other day my mom was

over when I was having a particularly rough day. She and I were

talking and she just got quite all of a sudden. I thought maybe she

wasn't feeling well. I asked if she was okay and she said yes.

Finally I said, Mom what is wrong. she looked at me with tears in

her eyes and said I am just so worried about you. I have tears in

my eyes as I write this. Another time, my 20 year old daughter had

come to the hospital to visit me since I was in the hospital near

the town where she goes to college. She was sitting on my bed,

rubbing my hand, when I noticed she was crying. I asked her what in

the world was the matter. She said she was scared to death for me.

I told her this mama was gonna be fine and had no intention of going

anywhere. I promised her I'd be around a good long time to keep

making her crazy, just like Granny does me (though I don't know what

I'd without my mom). I promised her that eventually I would get

better again. Since that time, I try to downplay things with my

daughter, especially. It's a lot easier than with my mom and hubby

since she lives 2 1/2 hours away. She is only 20 for pete's sake.

She is a junior in college and works, too. She does not need to be

worrying about me! Seeing the pain and worry in the faces of my

loved ones is much more painful than the physical pain. It is one

of the hardest things of a chronic illness.

>

> W

> Spouses that worry

>

> Arghhh

>

> I hide my pain most of the time but he frets about me goign down

> hill again especially when I have these episodes pain thats not

> under control. arghhhhh

> anyone else have a fretty hubby

> Kind ahard tellign them its a cross between somone giving you

agood

> punch and a stb in th back with a knife and a sharp twist

>

> arghhh

>

> debs

>

> PANCREATITIS Association, Intl.

> Online e-mail group

>

> To reply to this message hit & quot;reply & quot; or send

an e-mail to: Pancreatitis@Y...

>

November 18, 2002

Debs,

My mom and I are very close, too. Although at times she makes me crazy. She

know this but we laugh because she also knows that even when's she's making me

crazy I love her so very much. She is truly an advocate for me. As my stepdad

says, they do not want to experience the wrath of Marilyn! My hubby is great

but I can't imagine him letting them have it like my mom can do.

Moms are sure the greatest, aren't they? Yesterday after my mom and I got back

from Walmart, I told her I need a hug. She's a real big hugger and sometimes it

kind of gets on my nerves. I'm not as much of a touchy, feely person as her. I

never let on though. However, I'd had an episode of my sugar bottoming out

while out walmart and she was able to come to my rescue cause she had raisins in

her purse. I'm new at this sugar thing so I haven't gotten in the habit of

having something in my purse despite her fussing at me. Anyway, the raisins

helped but I was still feeling a little out of sorts when we got home. I just

felt so thankful to have my mom. I gave her a big hug and told her I love her

so much and don't know what I'd do without her. Of course, then I had to start

crying. My hubby came in and since he's such a goof ball, he had to join our

hug. Then he said okay enough mushy stuff and we all had to laugh. I said yeah

cause you stink! He'd been mowing the yard and had gotten gasoline on his

clothes.

Anyway, my mom is the greatest even if she does make me crazy at times. The bad

thing is she's so darn right much of the time when I don't want to listen to her

(like telling me I need to carry my glucose monitor and something in my purse in

case I have an episode of my sugar dropping when we're out). I actually snapped

at her the last time she suggested it and told her to leave me alone cause I'm

not a friggin' diabetic. Well, I still don't think I'm a diabetic but I still

should have listened to her. Geez, I'm 41 and still have problems listening to

my mom. You'd think I'd have learned by now. After this afternoon, I said oh,

by the way, before you tell me, I thought I'd let you know that I will carry my

monitor and something with sugar in it in my purse from now, so don't worry

about me! She just smiled.

W