Re: Making Someone Else Get Care / Lanie ...

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 12/18/2002 11:06:19 AM US Eastern Standard Time,

queenlanie@... writes:

> >>>. My Mom has CP ... vomiting ..cannot keep anything down...She is ..

> pretending nothing is wrong... I just don't know what to do? Lanie <<<

Lanie,

Unless your mother is incapacitated by physical handicap or dementia, there

is nothing you can do. Find a good 12 step group for codependency anonymous.

I am serious. Living with someone with a chronic illness is one of the major

issues that bring up coda relationships problems. You cannot make her do

anything. For whatever reason, she is in denial, and she has to hit bottom

and realizes she has a serious medical condition. Then she will do what she

has to do to get care.

Pancreatitis requires a complete lifestyle change, even if you were healthy

to start with. Getting to the first doctor's appointment is only one of the

incredible many things that must be done. She is the only one that can be

responsible for her health care. When she is ready, your job can be to

support her, but not do it.

Pancreatitis is a catastrophic, progressive, debilitating, and disabling

disease. It can be and frequently is fatal. I understand the pain of watching

someone you love spiral down and there is nothing you can do. You need to

keep taking care of yourself, your family if you have one. Check on her, give

her phone numbers of doctors in her area.

Does she have computer access? Does she do email? If this isn't a basis for a

support system, we can help connect her to telephone support. But, when she

is ready. If she wants some literature to read, let me know.

And, pray for her willingness to face this disease. Give her space, time.

There are no magic answers. The most important thing is for you to know that

you are not responsible for her health care. If you are legally responsible

for her care, that is another question. It doesn't sound like that is the

case.

Good luck.

Karyn E. , RN

Founder / Executive Director

Pancreatitis Association International

Corp. Office: Indps, IN, USA 1-

[Guest guest]

lovepoanna153@c... wrote:

I have chronic pancreatitis. I am trying to take care of my

husband who has chronic regional pain called RSD. Somedays I

sure wish I had someone to take care of me.Having cp has

ruined my life. I live in a little town in Indiana .The doctors here

have no clue about cp. I need someone to talk to. If anyone

wants to talk to me please write to me.

Thanks

Lovepoanna,

It would help a lot if you were to give us your name, it would

make it easier to identify you and talk with you. I am so very sorry

that you feel abandoned by the medical community while you are

having to deal with our own CP, and care for another chronic

pain patient as well. Having a physician that can treat you with

compassion and experience of this disease is paramount to

how successfully you can care for yourself. If you are unable to

find a knowledgable specialist who will stick with you, then there

is much that you will need to learn to care for yourself.

Have you been instructed about a low fat diet (25 fat grams or

less per day), avoidance of alcohol and proper exercise? Have

you been prescribed pancreatic enzyme supplements and told

about the supplemental vitamins and antioxidants that are

important to take to replenish those nutrients the pancreas is

now incapable of absorbing? Have you been given assistance

with proper pain medications to help during an attack? Do you

know what to do when you do have a bad episode of pain?

I'm sorry for all the questions, but knowing the answers to these

questions can help us to assess how best we can help you.

There is an excellent source of information about pancreatitis

and practically everything you could learn to help yourself at our

library at:

http://www.top5plus5.com

If you go to this site you can find a plethora of useful information.

You can also ask any of us for help with any specific questions.

I'm sure that through the combined knowledge of our 600+

members, someone here will have the answer or know where to

find it for you.

It is very easy to feel all alone with this disease. So very few

people outside know anything about it and do not understand

what each of us goes through each day. That's why this group is

so special, because here when you speak, there is someone

that is listening, who understands, and who wants to help.

Please let us know how we can help you. And please feel free to

email me personally anytime you need to talk.

With hope and prayers,

Heidi

Heidi H. Griffeth

hhessgriffeth@...

South Carolina

Southeastern Representative

Pancreatitis Association, Intl.

[Guest guest]

lovepoanna153@c... wrote:

I have chronic pancreatitis. I am trying to take care of my

husband who has chronic regional pain called RSD. Somedays I

sure wish I had someone to take care of me.Having cp has

ruined my life. I live in a little town in Indiana .The doctors here

have no clue about cp. I need someone to talk to. If anyone

wants to talk to me please write to me.

Thanks

Lovepoanna,

It would help a lot if you were to give us your name, it would

make it easier to identify you and talk with you. I am so very sorry

that you feel abandoned by the medical community while you are

having to deal with our own CP, and care for another chronic

pain patient as well. Having a physician that can treat you with

compassion and experience of this disease is paramount to

how successfully you can care for yourself. If you are unable to

find a knowledgable specialist who will stick with you, then there

is much that you will need to learn to care for yourself.

Have you been instructed about a low fat diet (25 fat grams or

less per day), avoidance of alcohol and proper exercise? Have

you been prescribed pancreatic enzyme supplements and told

about the supplemental vitamins and antioxidants that are

important to take to replenish those nutrients the pancreas is

now incapable of absorbing? Have you been given assistance

with proper pain medications to help during an attack? Do you

know what to do when you do have a bad episode of pain?

I'm sorry for all the questions, but knowing the answers to these

questions can help us to assess how best we can help you.

There is an excellent source of information about pancreatitis

and practically everything you could learn to help yourself at our

library at:

http://www.top5plus5.com

If you go to this site you can find a plethora of useful information.

You can also ask any of us for help with any specific questions.

I'm sure that through the combined knowledge of our 600+

members, someone here will have the answer or know where to

find it for you.

It is very easy to feel all alone with this disease. So very few

people outside know anything about it and do not understand

what each of us goes through each day. That's why this group is

so special, because here when you speak, there is someone

that is listening, who understands, and who wants to help.

Please let us know how we can help you. And please feel free to

email me personally anytime you need to talk.

With hope and prayers,

Heidi

Heidi H. Griffeth

hhessgriffeth@...

South Carolina

Southeastern Representative

Pancreatitis Association, Intl.

[Guest guest]

lovepoanna153@c... wrote:

I have chronic pancreatitis. I am trying to take care of my

husband who has chronic regional pain called RSD. Somedays I

sure wish I had someone to take care of me.Having cp has

ruined my life. I live in a little town in Indiana .The doctors here

have no clue about cp. I need someone to talk to. If anyone

wants to talk to me please write to me.

Thanks

Lovepoanna,

It would help a lot if you were to give us your name, it would

make it easier to identify you and talk with you. I am so very sorry

that you feel abandoned by the medical community while you are

having to deal with our own CP, and care for another chronic

pain patient as well. Having a physician that can treat you with

compassion and experience of this disease is paramount to

how successfully you can care for yourself. If you are unable to

find a knowledgable specialist who will stick with you, then there

is much that you will need to learn to care for yourself.

Have you been instructed about a low fat diet (25 fat grams or

less per day), avoidance of alcohol and proper exercise? Have

you been prescribed pancreatic enzyme supplements and told

about the supplemental vitamins and antioxidants that are

important to take to replenish those nutrients the pancreas is

now incapable of absorbing? Have you been given assistance

with proper pain medications to help during an attack? Do you

know what to do when you do have a bad episode of pain?

I'm sorry for all the questions, but knowing the answers to these

questions can help us to assess how best we can help you.

There is an excellent source of information about pancreatitis

and practically everything you could learn to help yourself at our

library at:

http://www.top5plus5.com

If you go to this site you can find a plethora of useful information.

You can also ask any of us for help with any specific questions.

I'm sure that through the combined knowledge of our 600+

members, someone here will have the answer or know where to

find it for you.

It is very easy to feel all alone with this disease. So very few

people outside know anything about it and do not understand

what each of us goes through each day. That's why this group is

so special, because here when you speak, there is someone

that is listening, who understands, and who wants to help.

Please let us know how we can help you. And please feel free to

email me personally anytime you need to talk.

With hope and prayers,

Heidi

Heidi H. Griffeth

hhessgriffeth@...

South Carolina

Southeastern Representative

Pancreatitis Association, Intl.