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A hard decision

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Well All,

I am back. I had fun on the trip to WA. I had 3 good days

and two bad days. And, while there I finally made a

decision that has been very hard for me to make. I spoke

with my boss today and let her know what me and my current

doctors are trying to do regarding my problems with my pain

medications and their affect on my work. If none of them

work by the end of December, I will start the process of

going on disability in January. I cannot continue to make

the masssive errors and missed deadlines that I have over

the past 6 months. If I could, I would continue working, but

I've done so badly in this new positions and in my old

position that I would have gotten a very bad review and

probably lose my job, so I am making the decision to go on

disability before that happens.

I really hope that my memory lapses, loss of time and

massive errors clear up with the treatment for sleep apnea,

anemia, and possibly a change of pain medications if my CT

scan and blood tests come out normal. If they do not then I

have no choice but to go on disablity. As it stands today, I

am not a reliable worker.I never know when I'll be out sick,

when I am at work, I frequently fall asleep at my desk, or

zone out in mid-key stroke. It has affected all aspects of

my job and home life. I am unable to keep the house as clean

as I want it and I am always tired. I forgot my brother's

birthday - something I have never done. I intend to try and

discuss this with all my doctors and get their buy in to

help me with this process. I just thought I'd share this

with all of you as you will understand better than any other

how hard a decision this was to make for me.

So now it's time for me to gather all my medical records as

quickly as possible and review them and hopefully make

something coherent out of them for SSA to review. Maybe this

might get me my disability sooner. (fat chance, but it's

worth the try).

I'm sure I will pick the brains of those of you who have

already gotten your disability benefits. Since my memory is

so bad, I am going to create a checklist of all the things I

have to do to do this. Any help or suggestions of things to

put on this checklist would be greatly appreciated.

Kimber

--

Kimber

Vallejo, CA

hominid2@...

Southwest and California Representative

Pancreatitis Association, International

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