FUNNY X-MAS POEM

[Guest guest]

This was sent to me, hope you might like it;-

Christmas is coming and the goose is getting fat,

And the goose is not the only one if it comes to that.

I've been to little parties, I say " No thank you " then " Yes please "

And lumpy dumpy dimples are growing round my knees.

They load those Christmas platters with little cakes and creams.

And last Summer's Sunday suit has split the centre seam.

My mirror says " You mustn't, but the devil says " You must "

And I'm growing round the hips and improving round the bust.

I'm the butt of all the family wit, they sing their little song;

We love our chubby mummy, she's as broad as she is long,

I'll stuff a little turkey, I'll throw in a spud or two,

I'll make a nice rich gravy, like my mother used to do.

I'll make a luscious Christmas mince in a butter pastry bed,

And I'll eat it while I'm living, I can't eat it when I'm dead.

I try to lose weight, but it keeps finding me.

So deck the halls with holly, while I boil up a pud,

And I promise I'll spend all next year eating what I should.

(Australia)