new cf mom to your message board

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I have three boys 13, 11,and 9years old. The youngest has cf. He has been very

sick ,he has problems with lungs and his bowels.He has been in the hospital at

least once a year since he was three before that he was there at least four

times a year. The doctor just put him on tobi two months ago and he hates the

time it takes . I try to make it fun and tell him it will keep him out of the

hospital. My other boys worry about when they saw him so sick this

summer,he was on the aerosol machine alot more then he every was before.He can

not go all night with out it sometimes. So it is really nice to hear some other

people talking about their lives with cf. mom of 3, 2wocf, and 1wcf

Subject: Re: Re: Jeanne - adoption

In a message dated 10/27/2002 10:03:43 PM Central Standard Time,

ron88jen@... writes:

>

> Jeanne,

> Personally, I don't think so. Though, as adoptive parents also,

> somtimes I have to wonder if we were nuts....

> In our case, we adopted two kids that were originally supposed to be 6

> week placements....we thought we could do anything for 6 weeks...

> Anyway, 6 weeks became 2 yrs, then they were returned to a drug

> addicted mom and had a yr of hell. Then we got them back...after they

> bounced from emerg. shelters to foster homes they came back to us.

> Everything we had worked on fixing was gone. They both had severe

> behavior problems and we had pretty much helped them to solve all of

> that. They came back with much much worse problems (reactive

> attachment disorder), and the oldest has some really bad behavioural

> problems. If you email me privately, I could discuss it more but

> shouldn't online.

> There are times when we are dealing with extreme (I really do mean

> extreme) lying, stealing, fits that we both wonder what we have done

> to the rest of the family. Yet, we love them as our own, if that

> makes any sense. And more than that we honestly felt that we might be

> there only chance...there was certainly no one waiting in line to

> adopt them with their issues. One of them does have a lifelong

> medical problem (not cf) that only exacerbates the behaviors, because

> she can manipulate it as a behaviour thing. Still, for them I believe

> we did the right thing....for us, I am not always so sure. We cannot

> leave them with anyone, and the oldest is constantly getting kicked

> out of school. made the mistake of leaving them with family this

> weekend and I feel terrible the way she treated my mom. she is

> stillscreaming a fit right now, in fact and has refused to eat dinner

> (which is a huge issue due to her JD)

> I will also be honest....having three kids with CF of my own, I know

> in my heart that it would actually be easier to have adopted two more

> kids with CF as young kids (young enough that you don't have RAD as an

> issue) and without the behavioural component. I thought CF had an

> impact on the family and the rest of the kids until we encountered

> RAD. (and my kids with CF are high maint. CF....esp. Mallory, the 5

> yo who also has lots of other probs, asthma, osa, etc and is on ivs

> every 3 months regimen, has a port, etc... usually gets ivs

> about every 5 months or so, so its not like I am comparing to kids who

> just need enzymes or anything)

> MY sister is in process of adopting a little girl (cousins baby) with

> CF, actually.

> So this was a long way of saying, no, I don't think you are

> crazy...afterall, we never even planned to adopt and then we did,

> feeling it was the right thing to do. And, the child already lives

> with you, likely already considers you mom and dad (as our two adopted

> kiddos did...) and so it makes sense. If I was going to plan to adopt

> (which we prob. wouldn't because we have 5 biological kids), I think I

> would prefer to adopt a child with CF or anything medically fragile

> (CP, etc....even HIV) to one with RAD at this point.

> Hope this makes sense....have to leave out alot of detail so if you

> want more info, feel free to email me independently.

> Take care,

> Jen

> Mommy of 7, 3 with CF, two adopted, one with JD

>

WOW!! Jen how do you do it? Do you work? I think I would be out of my mind

with that kind of a load. You must be a Saint. Deb A