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Okay I know this list isn't for jokes, but this email I got is way to

appropriate.....especially for us pre-ops. Please don't get upset about

this post....if you're not interested, just click delete.

in Okla

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when

she was 60. She's 97 now and we don't know where the hell she

is.

The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I

could hear heavy breathing again.

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400

bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

I have to exercise early in the morning before my

brain figures out what I'm doing.

I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our

toes, he would have put them further up our body.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by

people who annoy me.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach

covers them.

The advantage of exercising every day is that you die

healthier.

If you are going to try cross-county skiing, start

with a small country.

I don't jog; it makes the ice jump right out of my

glass.

and last but not least...

It is well documented that for every mile that you

jog.....you add one minute to your life .... This enables you,

at 85 years old.... to spend an additional 5 months in a

nursing home at $5000 per month

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