Caregiver Feelings

[Guest guest]

Dear and Vera: You both have expressed feelings and happenings that go on around here all the time. - Bob is also in the "right now" mode most of the time. Upstairs a while ago when I was transferring Bob from his transport wheelchair to his Lounge-Lift chair in the living room he would not let go of the transport chair even though with the PT he did it correctly all the time. If he keeps hold of the transport chair it will tip and bang him or me. He's tired of listening to me. Bob and I have been married 52 years next August and like everything we've had our ups and downs but overall he was a wonderful husband and father - a man with many interests, activities and always helpful and sharing with friends, neighbors or folks he met along the way. It is hard to see him so handicapped and just hard to see him failing as he is. Vera - I know what you mean by having a good cry but, like you I try to pull myself together again and I will go out in the garden and plant another petunia.

Bob is hard to understand sometimes. He is going for a swallow test this summer and maybe they will have some hints. He gets mad when I don't know or understand what he is saying all the time. My Mom will be 98 on Thursday and Friday afternoon I have invited some family, friends and neighbors over for a little celebration with cake and a little party. She is a lot less care than Bob. She has osteoporosis and is bent over but she gets up at night herself with her walker and can make her own way to the bathroom. The sad thing about being her age is all her 10 brothers and sisters are deceased - she was the sixth - and all her friends have also gone to be with God.

A few of my cousins will be here but so many have moved all over the country and her children and grandchildren - a lot of them have moved too. She loves parties -

Bob was the best host - but he will just sit and watch all the activity. I sort of entertain for him too as it gives him something to keep him occupied. Bill - I have received so much help from your posts I hope to see you on the list again soon.

Take Care, Pat from Framingham MA