Re: How can 3 millimetres make a difference ?? -

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

This is not intended to disrepect the right for you to have your

opinion on the cosmetic surgery, nor your motivations for having it.

I want to address your remark about looking deep within oneself. As a

somewhat serious student of meditation and Eastern philosophy, I can

tell you that, from my personal experience and the resources I've

tapped, the deeper one looks within, the less one cares about

physical beauty.

Happiness can't be measured in $$ or mm. I think it can be found by

looking within and learning to live in the present, not the past or

the future. That works for me, anyway.

That's my philosophical moment for today.

> I think that although most people don't want to admit the

importance of physical beauty in their life, if they search deep

within themselves I think they will find it. It can be frowned upon

though so most people don't want to admit it.

> **

[Guest guest]

,

I agree wholeheartedly with your statement. I do however find that

sometimes it can be very easy for people to say that their physical

appearance has no impact on their attitude or confidence, the fact of

the matter is that for some people it does. I just wanted the

original poster to feel okay about having these feelings. Of course

in an ideal situation the entire world would feel the way you do,

unfortunately not all of us are there yet. I don't usually respond to

posts, I mostly just read them, but I felt like I had something

personal to contribute. Ideally we all want to be able to eat and

sleep comfortably and to be free from pain. In addition to that there

can be some cosmetic improvements to our facial symmetry with the

surgery. I think that the original poster should talk about that with

his/her doctor.

The surgeon is the utmost authority on the procedure but sometimes a

patient needs to be pro-active about their goals and a realistic

outcome.

**

> > I think that although most people don't want to admit the

> importance of physical beauty in their life, if they search deep

> within themselves I think they will find it. It can be frowned upon

> though so most people don't want to admit it.

> > **

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Thanks for your reply. Maybe I should clarify to say that I feel that

it's people's attitudes about their physical appearance that is the

problem, not the other way around. Other people are often

uncomfortable with how we who are different look (whether it's excess

or insufficient weight, different skin colour, hair loss, aging,

etc), and many of us internalize this. I certainly went through that

experience of looking different than my peers at a young age, but

managed to get beyond it.

Surgery can't change that, how could it? It might give someone some

sense of change for a brief period of time, but the real change has

to be done from inside, not outside. I can say this as someone who

had some pretty dramatic physical change as a result of this surgery.

I literally woke up to a stranger in the mirror, the only part of me

that looked like the old me was from the eyes up and the neck down.

That presented quite a challenge, even to someone who was relatively

secure with how they looked pre-op.

There's nothing wrong with offering support on this topic, don't get

me wrong, and I don't want to discourage you from posting, but I feel

it's also important to present a balance, even if we don't agree. And

very basically, I disagree with your statement that most people don't

want to admit that physical beauty is important in their life. Try

looking deeper, you'll be amazed at what you see.

I think that although most people don't want to admit the importance

of physical beauty in their life, if they search deep within

themselves I think they will find it. It can be frowned upon though

so most people don't want to admit it.

**

[Guest guest]

In 1990, I had a corrective eye surgery (my left and right eyes deviated

greatly from each other). It didn't bother me (the problem started when

I was 3, so I really never remember being otherwise). It, however,

bothered anyone around me greatly. Every new people I would meet

would need time to adjust, it was impossible (or nearly) to meet new

people in public places (bars, coffee shops, etc). Explaining which eye

was the working one began to be my introduction line. Boring.

The moment I got this surgery, I immediately saw a change in people

attitude towards me. They were easy around me, and I got to finally

be able to meet and speak to people, easily.

It was purely a cosmetic surgery (3D vision has never been restored).

On me personaly, it had no effect (no direct effect). On people

surrounding me, it had a trumendous impact.

So, if you want a costmetic surgery, and feel it'll help you, go for it.

Ray