Re: scared

[Guest guest]

Zoe, you answered your own question as to what you have to

do....first off, you already lost 150 pounds....you have the ability

to lose 15-20. I too am in your position....I am 2.5 or so years

post-op, I haven't seen my surgeon since he did my TT one year post-

op,my GP is the only dr. I see... I have been not getting on the

scale because in my heart I knew damn well I had gone up in weight

(wonder who I was trying to fool???) and this morning I found myself

having to " own up " to my extra 13 pounds!

So, we have a choice.....we can choose to continue to ignore the

fact that we are increasing in weight, and in another year from now

we will have 1) dropped from the list because our 15-20 pounds has

turning in to 50-60 pounds or more, or 2) admit that yep, we have to

do something to get rid of that 15-20 pounds, and only you can do it

for you (and me for myself) can do it. We are all of the nature

that if it were possible to lose weight for someone else we would do

it.... But, alas, we can only do it for ourselves.

I think that we have a tendency to not give ourselves enough

credit....granted, we had surgery in order for us to lose weight

initially, but, nevertheless, WE STILL DID IT!!! WE had to " not "

have that extra bite when we probably really wish we could have, but

the fact still remains we chose, and we can choose again.

You with me??? The one thing we KNOW for certain is the fact that

we will get all the support we need from this group....Let's " know "

for certain we can lose that rebound weight!!

This is meant for anyone who is struggling with rebound weight...the

first step is......

Hugs,

KJ

260/130/143

[Guest guest]

Donna,

Take a deep breath. The truth lies somewhere in the middle. There are LOTS

of people who are successful. People who have lost well over 200 pounds. If

they gain back 30 or 40 pounds, they still have a whole new lease on life.

Perhaps we give the wrong impression because we tend to talk more about

struggles or problems. The newbie stage of talking about constant weight

loss, smaller sizes and newfound places to fit is long gone. I'm almost 16

months out and still losing, albeit very slowly. Somewhere between 2 and 5

pounds a month manage to lose their way and I hope they never find their way

back to me. I like to hear from the folks who are 3 or 4 years out, to hear

how things are after the plastic surgeries, after life has settled down.

Unfortunately most of them seem to move on and not post much. My local

surgeon's board was much like the one you describe, but it was because we

were all newbies and didn't know what the long run looked like. An " old

timer " was somebody 8 months out from surgery!

We all want to know what the future holds. I have some fear because on an

intellectual level I know that surgeries do fail and a few people do gain ALL

their weight back. But I don't have that emotional fear cause right now my

relationship with food is in control. I say " right now " cause I know that

can change at any time, just like an alcoholic. I'd given up on my life,

literally going down for the third time. Having broken the surface, realized

that life can be sweet and good again....I don't believe I'll ever let myself

sink to that level again. Whatever it takes in terms of medical

intervention, I will not fail to pursue the care and remedies to hang onto my

newfound health.

B

[Guest guest]

Donna:

I'm over 4.5 years out, rebounded a needed 10 or 15 pounds and am as happy

as I can be about this surgery. I have no problems with eating and no

problems at all maintaining my weight loss. I generally try to eat right,

animal protein and vegetables, but it feels nothing like a diet.

Not everyone has problems by any means. Sometimes the people on here who

need help are the most vocal ones, because they *need* to be. I am not

arrogant about my good fortune. I am incredibly thankful for it. Knock on

wood, I don't think of it as a tool, but as a miracle.

in Austin

RNY April 1998

scared

> After reading all of your posts I am truly scared that it is

> inevitable that I am just going to gain back all the weight I lost

> just like every other time I ever lost weight. It's amazing

> to me that so many of you have such terrible health problems and yet

> still are struggling with weight. I know that. I am just dismayed at the

failure rate I am

> seeing here on this board.

[Guest guest]

> After reading all of your posts I am truly scared that it is inevitable

that I am just going to gain back all the weight I lost just like every

other time I ever lost weight. I am 17 months PO. Is there anyone here who

has had success besides Jacque?<<

Dear Donna, I am truly happy that you found us and us you -- different

people measure success in different ways -- if you mean getting off all the

weight you want to get off, meeting your own personal weight goals and

maintaining it while gaining your health and a life back -- then yes,

measured in that way I've been real successful... far more so than I even

expected from the start and I'm really pleased with my track record and my

ability to continue staying the size that is " my goal " and regaining my

health.

I'm 28 months post op and with the exception of one eating frenzy that

packed on some extra pounds that I worked hard to get back off I have

maintained my goal size and I feel successful in my health area as well.

You'll find many with 4, 8 and even more years on this list who have

maintained their weight and their health using their tool in a way that

makes it possible to do this for life, be comfortable doing it and enjoying

long term success.

Stats: I'm 42, female, starting size 28-30 or 3X, ending size 4, some

6's -- I'm 5' 6 " open RnY proximal and I do have to work at it... more to

learn and keep heart healthy food choices than anything. It isn't like the

old " diet " thing as in the way life was pre-op but more of a keeping my

health sort of thing.

>>>It's amazing to me that so many of you have such terrible health problems

and yet still are struggling with weight. Good Lord, what does it take to

be thin?<<<

I think some struggle more than others -- many people who spend the first

year seriously changing their habits. IMO, therapy or counseling is very

helpful in learning why we eat like we do and make the choices we make is

very helpful for me -- using the first year when the weight loss is easy to

learn habits that will take us through the tough times... IMO... help us to

not have that life long struggle as well as helping us in keeping up a good

healthy eating plan to avoid the health issues as much as possible.

>>>I thought I had succumbed to the ultimate by going under the knife and

having my anatomy rearranged and even this does not help in the long run?

Please don't start with the " it's only a tool " diatribe. I know that. I am

just dismayed at the failure rate I am seeing here on this board.<<<

I am wondering what measure you use for success and failure. (?) As I said

earlier, everyone has a different idea or ideal of the success and failure

of this surgery. To me, if a person is happy with their own results

regardless of what that is... if they are happy then to me they are

successful. Success to me is the feeling the person ends up with -- being

happy with their end results IMO makes them a success regardless of what

" size " that is to them.

I have found the size I am happy living in and have been able to maintain

that size for more than a year with the exception of my " slip " which, when I

got back to my own eating plan and doing what I have to do for me -- got rid

of those pounds and am back at my " this feels good for me " size. I measure

my own success in being able to wear the same things in my closet from year

to year -- that just feels great (and a first in my life type of thing too.)

>>>I made the mistake of staying too long on my surgeon's message board

where there are a few people always saying that the pounds are gone forever

and that they never diet, eat whatever they want and some of them saying

that they keep losing no matter what. In fact I have gotten more bad advice

and started more bad habits by reading that board than anything else that

has affected me adversely. Now that the bad advice has ruined my good

habits I will have to start all over.<<<

Sounds like you know what you are going to have to do to get " yourself "

back to the way you want to be... and you know where things went wrong. I

personally believe that we will always have the disease of being MO and this

surgery helps us to stay in remission but we can and many do eat their way

right back to MO if they don't change their habits.

The hard part is that the first year or during the fast weight loss phase

it is possible to eat a lot of stuff without getting really bad results and

because of that a lot of people don't use that time to learn good, life long

and healthy habits. I don't believe any of us loose this weight forever and

if we don't work at new habits we can have our old bodies back in no time at

all... as well as all the poor health issues we began with. The pounds are

never just " gone " forever... those fat cells are just sitting there waiting

to fill up again if we provide them with the right foods they need to fill

up and then we are right back at our old obese selves.

You were smart to recognize that this is a life long journey and it will

require you to work at forming new habits, regaining your health and that

while you are in the fast weight loss phase a doughnut or even two may not

have any affect on your weight loss at a couple of years out it will not

only affect your weight loss, help you gain but is dangerous for us in

maintaining our health.

Don't be sorry about rambling -- you have some very valid points but you've

also made some very wise moves for yourself to help yourself get and

maintain your goal size and health. Without looking back you can begin today

doing what you know is right for you.

hugz,

~denise