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Carole,

i am so sorry if u feel offended,,,,i dont know u ,,i am just a human being with feelings too that had a very very difficult recovery and a second unexpected surgery,,,,i too like u suffered all my life with obesity and this was my last chance at a sane mind and healthy body..I too have feelings and was hurt that u said "I dont care about , all i want is this surgery" I believe this list is about caring and sharing,,i had enough problems with Dr Gagner, my recovery, and mt sinai to have people that didnt know me stating awful remarks like maybe i was sexually abused as a child,,i am a very happpy person , a good nurse , daughter, friend to my special friends, i just had a horrible four weeks and it hurt to see that this world is filled with people so uncaring,,,there were some that were wonderful..

I dont know if u had ur surgery,,,i would like to be ur friend and help u if i could so u shouldnt have to go thru anything like i did Carole,,,,,,lets all stop the fighting we should as i said be here for one another,,we as people with weight problems have faced enough prejudice from the civillians in the thin world,,,and yes if i do lose my weight i will feel better carole but so far it is coming off slow..nothing has ever been easy for me,,,even dr gagner said my recovery was more difficult cause of the hernia repair,,

anyways good good luck even write me if i can help u...

all the best

karen

nyc

post op six weeks tuesday down 20 and tired but otherwise good

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Carole,

i am so sorry if u feel offended,,,,i dont know u ,,i am just a human being with feelings too that had a very very difficult recovery and a second unexpected surgery,,,,i too like u suffered all my life with obesity and this was my last chance at a sane mind and healthy body..I too have feelings and was hurt that u said "I dont care about , all i want is this surgery" I believe this list is about caring and sharing,,i had enough problems with Dr Gagner, my recovery, and mt sinai to have people that didnt know me stating awful remarks like maybe i was sexually abused as a child,,i am a very happpy person , a good nurse , daughter, friend to my special friends, i just had a horrible four weeks and it hurt to see that this world is filled with people so uncaring,,,there were some that were wonderful..

I dont know if u had ur surgery,,,i would like to be ur friend and help u if i could so u shouldnt have to go thru anything like i did Carole,,,,,,lets all stop the fighting we should as i said be here for one another,,we as people with weight problems have faced enough prejudice from the civillians in the thin world,,,and yes if i do lose my weight i will feel better carole but so far it is coming off slow..nothing has ever been easy for me,,,even dr gagner said my recovery was more difficult cause of the hernia repair,,

anyways good good luck even write me if i can help u...

all the best

karen

nyc

post op six weeks tuesday down 20 and tired but otherwise good

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Hi melanie,

maybe u are right,,i am sure that my having a hard hard hard recovery probably frightened people who are still pre op ,never the less, i was raised to treat others with kindness, and being a nurse i will always care about others,

karen

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Hi melanie,

maybe u are right,,i am sure that my having a hard hard hard recovery probably frightened people who are still pre op ,never the less, i was raised to treat others with kindness, and being a nurse i will always care about others,

karen

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I think this may be a case where the lack of intonation inherent in email correspondence has caused a misunderstanding. I can't be 100% sure of Carole's intention, but my perception was that in saying she "didn't care about ", she was not saying she didn't care about you as a person, . My sense was that she was saying that the extreme focus and criticism of you was a bit "over the top". Not that she didn't care about you, you know? I don't know if I'm expressing it well. Some people are more eloquent in writing than others, and I think some people have had a hard time getting a read on you, . I think that overall, the list has wanted to be helpful to you, but some were discouraged and that led to some unwarranted criticism. I think it is clear now that you are starting to feel better and your frustration with your discomfort is easing, which takes some pressure off the people who really wanted to see you feel better and might have been grasping at straws to try to help you.

-----Original Message-----From: Happy2knowU2@... Sent: Saturday, July 14, 2001 5:01 PMTo: duodenalswitch Subject: Re: time

Carole, i am so sorry if u feel offended,,,,i dont know u ,,i am just a human being with feelings too that had a very very difficult recovery and a second unexpected surgery,,,,i too like u suffered all my life with obesity and this was my last chance at a sane mind and healthy body..I too have feelings and was hurt that u said "I dont care about , all i want is this surgery" I believe this list is about caring and sharing,,i had enough problems with Dr Gagner, my recovery, and mt sinai to have people that didnt know me stating awful remarks like maybe i was sexually abused as a child,,i am a very happpy person , a good nurse , daughter, friend to my special friends, i just had a horrible four weeks and it hurt to see that this world is filled with people so uncaring,,,there were some that were wonderful.. I dont know if u had ur surgery,,,i would like to be ur friend and help u if i could so u shouldnt have to go thru anything like i did Carole,,,,,,lets all stop the fighting we should as i said be here for one another,,we as people with weight problems have faced enough prejudice from the civillians in the thin world,,,and yes if i do lose my weight i will feel better carole but so far it is coming off slow..nothing has ever been easy for me,,,even dr gagner said my recovery was more difficult cause of the hernia repair,, anyways good good luck even write me if i can help u... all the best karen nyc post op six weeks tuesday down 20 and tired but otherwise good ----------------------------------------------------------------------

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I think this may be a case where the lack of intonation inherent in email correspondence has caused a misunderstanding. I can't be 100% sure of Carole's intention, but my perception was that in saying she "didn't care about ", she was not saying she didn't care about you as a person, . My sense was that she was saying that the extreme focus and criticism of you was a bit "over the top". Not that she didn't care about you, you know? I don't know if I'm expressing it well. Some people are more eloquent in writing than others, and I think some people have had a hard time getting a read on you, . I think that overall, the list has wanted to be helpful to you, but some were discouraged and that led to some unwarranted criticism. I think it is clear now that you are starting to feel better and your frustration with your discomfort is easing, which takes some pressure off the people who really wanted to see you feel better and might have been grasping at straws to try to help you.

-----Original Message-----From: Happy2knowU2@... Sent: Saturday, July 14, 2001 5:01 PMTo: duodenalswitch Subject: Re: time

Carole, i am so sorry if u feel offended,,,,i dont know u ,,i am just a human being with feelings too that had a very very difficult recovery and a second unexpected surgery,,,,i too like u suffered all my life with obesity and this was my last chance at a sane mind and healthy body..I too have feelings and was hurt that u said "I dont care about , all i want is this surgery" I believe this list is about caring and sharing,,i had enough problems with Dr Gagner, my recovery, and mt sinai to have people that didnt know me stating awful remarks like maybe i was sexually abused as a child,,i am a very happpy person , a good nurse , daughter, friend to my special friends, i just had a horrible four weeks and it hurt to see that this world is filled with people so uncaring,,,there were some that were wonderful.. I dont know if u had ur surgery,,,i would like to be ur friend and help u if i could so u shouldnt have to go thru anything like i did Carole,,,,,,lets all stop the fighting we should as i said be here for one another,,we as people with weight problems have faced enough prejudice from the civillians in the thin world,,,and yes if i do lose my weight i will feel better carole but so far it is coming off slow..nothing has ever been easy for me,,,even dr gagner said my recovery was more difficult cause of the hernia repair,, anyways good good luck even write me if i can help u... all the best karen nyc post op six weeks tuesday down 20 and tired but otherwise good ----------------------------------------------------------------------

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,

I dont think it was frightening as much as it was total frustration in trying to help you and then you would turn around and ask the same old quesitons over and over again as if you were not even trying to help yourself get better.

You complained about your surgeon....he told you to come in to see him and you didnt do that....then he tells you in an email that you are harrassing him and his staff by calling all the time and at ungodly hours even to the point of disrupting his family life. Suddenly......when the "focus" is off of , you begin to get better.

Thank goodness! And I hope you continue to improve.......

Judie

Re: time

Hi melanie, maybe u are right,,i am sure that my having a hard hard hard recovery probably frightened people who are still pre op ,never the less, i was raised to treat others with kindness, and being a nurse i will always care about others, karen ----------------------------------------------------------------------

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,

I dont think it was frightening as much as it was total frustration in trying to help you and then you would turn around and ask the same old quesitons over and over again as if you were not even trying to help yourself get better.

You complained about your surgeon....he told you to come in to see him and you didnt do that....then he tells you in an email that you are harrassing him and his staff by calling all the time and at ungodly hours even to the point of disrupting his family life. Suddenly......when the "focus" is off of , you begin to get better.

Thank goodness! And I hope you continue to improve.......

Judie

Re: time

Hi melanie, maybe u are right,,i am sure that my having a hard hard hard recovery probably frightened people who are still pre op ,never the less, i was raised to treat others with kindness, and being a nurse i will always care about others, karen ----------------------------------------------------------------------

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In a message dated 7/14/01 9:48:53 PM, duodenalswitch writes:

<< You complained about your surgeon....he told you to come in to see him and

you didnt do that....then he tells you in an email that you are harrassing

him and his staff by calling all the time and at ungodly hours even to the

point of disrupting his family life. Suddenly......when the " focus " is off

of , you begin to get better.

Thank goodness! And I hope you continue to improve.......

>>

Judie: Points well taken. :):) I also hope that continues to get

better and am glad that she's down 20 lbs! Hurrah!

all the best,

Noverr-Chin

co-moderator

lap ds with gallbladder removal

January 25, 2001

five months post-op and still feelin' fabu! :)

pre-op: 307 lbs/bmi 45

now: 238 lbs (hopefully goin' down???)

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In a message dated 7/14/01 9:48:53 PM, duodenalswitch writes:

<< You complained about your surgeon....he told you to come in to see him and

you didnt do that....then he tells you in an email that you are harrassing

him and his staff by calling all the time and at ungodly hours even to the

point of disrupting his family life. Suddenly......when the " focus " is off

of , you begin to get better.

Thank goodness! And I hope you continue to improve.......

>>

Judie: Points well taken. :):) I also hope that continues to get

better and am glad that she's down 20 lbs! Hurrah!

all the best,

Noverr-Chin

co-moderator

lap ds with gallbladder removal

January 25, 2001

five months post-op and still feelin' fabu! :)

pre-op: 307 lbs/bmi 45

now: 238 lbs (hopefully goin' down???)

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Congrats on the 20 lb loss too, karen! You are on your way now!!

Judie

Re: re: time

>

> In a message dated 7/14/01 9:48:53 PM, duodenalswitch

writes:

>

> << You complained about your surgeon....he told you to come in to see him

and

> you didnt do that....then he tells you in an email that you are harrassing

> him and his staff by calling all the time and at ungodly hours even to the

> point of disrupting his family life. Suddenly......when the " focus " is

off

> of , you begin to get better.

> Thank goodness! And I hope you continue to improve.......

> >>

>

> Judie: Points well taken. :):) I also hope that continues to get

> better and am glad that she's down 20 lbs! Hurrah!

>

> all the best,

> Noverr-Chin

> co-moderator

> lap ds with gallbladder removal

> January 25, 2001

>

> five months post-op and still feelin' fabu! :)

>

> pre-op: 307 lbs/bmi 45

> now: 238 lbs (hopefully goin' down???)

>

> ----------------------------------------------------------------------

>

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Congrats on the 20 lb loss too, karen! You are on your way now!!

Judie

Re: re: time

>

> In a message dated 7/14/01 9:48:53 PM, duodenalswitch

writes:

>

> << You complained about your surgeon....he told you to come in to see him

and

> you didnt do that....then he tells you in an email that you are harrassing

> him and his staff by calling all the time and at ungodly hours even to the

> point of disrupting his family life. Suddenly......when the " focus " is

off

> of , you begin to get better.

> Thank goodness! And I hope you continue to improve.......

> >>

>

> Judie: Points well taken. :):) I also hope that continues to get

> better and am glad that she's down 20 lbs! Hurrah!

>

> all the best,

> Noverr-Chin

> co-moderator

> lap ds with gallbladder removal

> January 25, 2001

>

> five months post-op and still feelin' fabu! :)

>

> pre-op: 307 lbs/bmi 45

> now: 238 lbs (hopefully goin' down???)

>

> ----------------------------------------------------------------------

>

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  • 1 year later...
Guest guest

Hi Friends,

This was sent to me and I wanted to share it with you.

Hugs,

Deborah aka Tenacity

____________________________________________________________________

Subject: TIME

Life is too short...enjoy what you have...

TIME . . . .

This was written by an 83-year-old woman to her friend.

The last line says it all.

Dear Bertha, I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting in the yard

and

admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm

spending more time with my family and friends and less time working.

Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not

to

endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.

I'm not " saving " anything; we use our good china and crystal for every

special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the

first Amaryllis blossom.

I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory is if I look prosperous,

I

can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries.

I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties, but wearing it for

clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank.

Someday " and " one of these days " are losing their grip on my vocabulary.

If

it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it

now.

I'm not sure what others would've done had they known they wouldn't be

here

for the tomorrow that we all take for granted.

I think they would have called family members and a few close friends.

They

might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for

past

squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner

or

for whatever their favorite food was.

I'm guessing; I'll never know.

It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew

my

hours were limited. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that

I

intended to write one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell

my

husband and parents often enough how much I truly love them. I'm trying

very

hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter

and

luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself

that

it is special. Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift

from

God.

If you received this, it is because someone cares for you.

If you're too busy to take the few minutes that it takes right now to

forward this, would it be the first time you didn't do the little thing

that

would make a difference in your relationships? I can tell you it

certainly

won't be the last.

Take a few minutes to send this to a few people you care about, just to

let

them know that you're thinking of them.

" People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don't

need

to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there. "

I don't believe in Miracles. I rely on them.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might

as

well dance.

Most sincerely,

anna R. Garrett

_________________________________________________________________

Join the world’s largest e-mail service with MSN Hotmail.

http://www.hotmail.com

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