Guest guest Posted December 30, 2002 Report Share Posted December 30, 2002 My niece is going through the same thing right now. She is 11 years old and well over 200 lbs. She is 5'2 and wears a women's size 20. I've been begging my brother for years to help this kid, but his reply has always been that he has nothing to do with it since she lives with her mother and she seems to be comfortable with herself. Told him that she never smiles, is always complaining that something hurts, like her ankle, knee, back, etc. and gets winded when she comes over and takes our dog out for a walk with my kids. She told me a few weeks ago that she doesn't get invited to birthday parties anymore and that she has no friends and the kids are picking on her all the time. She asked me to help her lose some weight since I just lost so much. I explained to her how I lost the weight and that I would help her in any way I could but she should talk to her father and let him know how and what she is feeling and maybe he can talk with her mother. The whole thing is sad. I suggested Weight Watchers to my brother and he told me that he doesn't believe in putting a kid on a diet as it would affect her self esteem. So I said getting picked on and ridiculed is better for her self esteem? Then I smacked him on the head. She told me that she understands now why I don't let Leah and drink soda or eat candy all day long and that they can have cookies and such, but they also have to compensate with healthy snacks too and that pizza once a week or less and Burger King once a month is more than sufficient. She told me that she used to think that I was just being mean to my kids because she eats Chinese spare ribs, fast food and ice cream at least 5 days a week. So I'm hoping that she start making the right food choices and ask for healthier foods while she is with her mom and told her that when she visits her dad we will do everything we can to help her. Regina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 31, 2002 Report Share Posted December 31, 2002 Regina, I think that this is great that you want to help your niece! Like everyone else on here I have my horrible childhood memories. Both of my parents worked at my " weight " issues......but from very different angles! My Dad was into the the humiliation, depravation scene. Where as my Mom (herself about 20-30lbs overweight) would try the usefull means, exercise, WW! My memories of both are reflected by the " means " they used. I have gratuities (sp) memories of my Mom because I knew that she felt my pain and wanted to help me. With my Dad it was because he was embarrased by me and needed to get me thin to avoid any public humiliation on him. I wish sooo bad that between the two of them it would have occured to them that the main issue shouldn't have just been getting the weight off.......but rather teaching my lifelong habits, and the " WHY's " of weight management. All said and done I am not sure how well it would have worked anyway, except that I wouldn't have probably reached the all the time high that I did! Now I have an obese child of my own (12 year old son who weighs in the 140's at 4'11 " ), and even with all my guidance and years of experience he still doesn't " want " to do the things necessary. Sure, he is tortured over his size and " wants " to be thin.......I guess just not enough yet to really do something about it. I guess what I am trying to say is that it is great that your niece has someone armed with the right knowledge and support to truly be a wonderful help should she decide to utilize it!!! Best wishes to you!!! P. RE: Fat Child > My niece is going through the same thing right now. She is 11 years old > and well over 200 lbs. She is 5'2 and wears a women's size 20. I've been > begging my brother for years to help this kid, but his reply has always > been that he has nothing to do with it since she lives with her mother > and she seems to be comfortable with herself. Told him that she never > smiles, is always complaining that something hurts, like her ankle, > knee, back, etc. and gets winded when she comes over and takes our dog > out for a walk with my kids. She told me a few weeks ago that she > doesn't get invited to birthday parties anymore and that she has no > friends and the kids are picking on her all the time. She asked me to > help her lose some weight since I just lost so much. I explained to her > how I lost the weight and that I would help her in any way I could but > she should talk to her father and let him know how and what she is > feeling and maybe he can talk with her mother. The whole thing is sad. I > suggested Weight Watchers to my brother and he told me that he doesn't > believe in putting a kid on a diet as it would affect her self esteem. > So I said getting picked on and ridiculed is better for her self esteem? > Then I smacked him on the head. > > She told me that she understands now why I don't let Leah and > drink soda or eat candy all day long and that they can have cookies and > such, but they also have to compensate with healthy snacks too and that > pizza once a week or less and Burger King once a month is more than > sufficient. She told me that she used to think that I was just being > mean to my kids because she eats Chinese spare ribs, fast food and ice > cream at least 5 days a week. So I'm hoping that she start making the > right food choices and ask for healthier foods while she is with her mom > and told her that when she visits her dad we will do everything we can > to help her. > > Regina > > > > > Homepage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG > > Unsubscribe: mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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