Guest guest Posted July 11, 2001 Report Share Posted July 11, 2001 SUE THE BIGGEST PROBLEM IS MY MOM'S MOBILITY AND ALSO HER MIND. SHE IS PUTTING THINGS ON THE STOVE WHEN ONE ONE IS WATCHING AND THEN FALLING ALSEEP AND ALSO JUST PLAIN FORGETING. THIS HAPPENS ANYTIME DAY OR NIGHT, IF SHE WAKES UP AT 2 AM SHE MITE THINK IT IS 2 PM AND DINNER TIME SO OUT COMES THE ROAST OR CHICKEN OR WHATEVER. YOU MITE WAKE UP WITH SMOKE OR A FULL COOKED M;EAL I AM SCARED SHE IS GOING TO HURT HERSELF OR BURN THE HOUSE DOWN. SHE WALKS WITH A WALKER AND KEEPS FALLING SO NOW I HAVE TO KEEP PICKING HER UP. AND WITH ALL OF THE PROBLEMS OF THIS RP I AM GETING TO THE POINT MY BACK IS SHOT, MY HIPS ARE SHOT AND I STAY IN CONSTANT PAIN, SO ITS JUST A MATTER OF SURVING. ONE MINUTE WHEN YOU ASK HER ABOUT THE HOME SHE IS FOR IT THEN IN 4 MINTURES SHE WILL SAY YOU NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT. AND SAY WE ARE LYING. SHE CAN READ HER PAPER THEN LOOK AT YOU AND ASK WHERE IS MY PAPER, AND SAY WE DID NOT GIVE IT TO HER. SO SEE WHAT I MEAN. THIS IS JUST SO HARD FOR ME I HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT CRY FOR THE LAST 2 WEEKS. I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING BUT DON'T REALLY WANT TO. IF I DID NOT WORK FULL TIME I WOULD TRY FOR LONGER. BUTTTTTTTTTTT OH WELL ENVOUGH VENTING, I GUESS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE WE ALL HAVE OUR PROBLEMS RIGHT NOW. I USUALLY DON'T GET LIKE THIS AND TRY TO BE HAPPY MOST OF THE TIME BUT THIS IS JUST HARD. LOVE TO ALL DAWN --- grandm4@... wrote: > Dear Dawn, I know its very hard on you. My Mom has > been in a CBRF and then > just 3 months ago a full fledged nursing home. This > has been for 6 years now. > Lucility it was her decision to go. She said she > could not live alone > anymore. You need to talk to your Mom and see what > her wishes are if that's > possible. Please remember when they raised us and > with their parents no one > wanted to be a " burden. " It seems to me as our > bodies deteriorate we want to > disassociate ourselves from our familes. Its a > difficult decision but one > that has to be done. My Mom is getting better in the > nursing home. She is > talking more and interacting. Read a joke once: Be > nice to your kids they > pick out your nursing home. We may all be there some > day. Love, Sue > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 11, 2001 Report Share Posted July 11, 2001 Dawn, I know it's hard. We tried to put my Mother-in-Law in assisted living because I did not want her in a nursing home. She was not able to take care of herself so we had no choice. She did not qualify for assisted living so we had to put her in the nursing home. She is in hospice care now, went to see her Monday night and she's still asking if she can come home. I feel bad but I know I can't care for her. I have days where I can barely take care of my own needs. You have to think of yourself, you are not well. I will pray that you find the strength you need to make your decision. If you need to talk just email me. Love Ya, Sandy > SUE > > THE BIGGEST PROBLEM IS MY MOM'S MOBILITY AND ALSO HER > MIND. SHE IS PUTTING THINGS ON THE STOVE WHEN ONE > ONE IS WATCHING AND THEN FALLING ALSEEP AND ALSO JUST > PLAIN FORGETING. THIS HAPPENS ANYTIME DAY OR NIGHT, > IF SHE WAKES UP AT 2 AM SHE MITE THINK IT IS 2 PM AND > DINNER TIME SO OUT COMES THE ROAST OR CHICKEN OR > WHATEVER. YOU MITE WAKE UP WITH SMOKE OR A FULL > COOKED M;EAL I AM SCARED SHE IS GOING TO HURT HERSELF > OR BURN THE HOUSE DOWN. SHE WALKS WITH A WALKER AND > KEEPS FALLING SO NOW I HAVE TO KEEP PICKING HER UP. > AND WITH ALL OF THE PROBLEMS OF THIS RP I AM GETING > TO THE POINT MY BACK IS SHOT, MY HIPS ARE SHOT AND I > STAY IN CONSTANT PAIN, SO ITS JUST A MATTER OF > SURVING. ONE MINUTE WHEN YOU ASK HER ABOUT THE HOME > SHE IS FOR IT THEN IN 4 MINTURES SHE WILL SAY YOU > NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT. AND SAY WE ARE LYING. SHE > CAN READ HER PAPER THEN LOOK AT YOU AND ASK WHERE IS > MY PAPER, AND SAY WE DID NOT GIVE IT TO HER. SO SEE > WHAT I MEAN. > > THIS IS JUST SO HARD FOR ME I HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT > CRY FOR THE LAST 2 WEEKS. I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING BUT > DON'T REALLY WANT TO. IF I DID NOT WORK FULL TIME I > WOULD TRY FOR LONGER. BUTTTTTTTTTTT > > OH WELL ENVOUGH VENTING, I GUESS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE > WE ALL HAVE OUR PROBLEMS RIGHT NOW. I USUALLY DON'T > GET LIKE THIS AND TRY TO BE HAPPY MOST OF THE TIME BUT > THIS IS JUST HARD. > > LOVE TO ALL > DAWN > --- grandm4@... wrote: > > Dear Dawn, I know its very hard on you. My Mom has > > been in a CBRF and then > > just 3 months ago a full fledged nursing home. This > > has been for 6 years now. > > Lucility it was her decision to go. She said she > > could not live alone > > anymore. You need to talk to your Mom and see what > > her wishes are if that's > > possible. Please remember when they raised us and > > with their parents no one > > wanted to be a " burden. " It seems to me as our > > bodies deteriorate we want to > > disassociate ourselves from our familes. Its a > > difficult decision but one > > that has to be done. My Mom is getting better in the > > nursing home. She is > > talking more and interacting. Read a joke once: Be > > nice to your kids they > > pick out your nursing home. We may all be there some > > day. Love, Sue > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 12, 2001 Report Share Posted July 12, 2001 In a message dated 7/11/01 10:24:38 PM Pacific Daylight Time, biglou5685@... writes: << Dawn, I know it's hard. We tried to put my Mother-in-Law in assisted living because I did not want her in a nursing home. She was not able to take care of herself so we had no choice. She did not qualify for assisted living so we had to put her in the nursing home. >> Sandy and Dawn, I went through the same thing. My mom was living with me and I got to where i couldn't take care of her. She took an accidental drug overdose and we almost lost her. That's when we all decided she needed to go to a retirement home (my mom made the decision too, but hesitantly) She was in the retirement home for a year and did a complete turn around. Was active and made new friends, then she went to assisted living and wasn't happy with that. But she didn't have a choice. Finally ened up in a nursing home in her final 6 weeks. Was hard on us all and I felt so guilty. But the last 6 weeks of her life were the best ever. She kept her sense of humor and we laughed and laughed. My sister and I spent alot of time with her and really enjoyed each other. It was the best decision we made for us. Now I feel at rest and know she did too. It is so hard. Please know I am here to if you just want to vent. My thoughts are with all of you having to make these decisions. Hugs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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