Consultation with surgeon and ortho

[Guest guest]

I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with my

orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would arrange

for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him and

the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing is

that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past said

parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want anyone

else there, which I know is silly.

I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both of

my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have to

be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt need my

parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon, so I

wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take them.

Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I should

take my parents, but I really dont want to.

Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

You're pretty independent for a 17 year old. When I was 17 and going

to meet the surgeon, taking my mom along wasn't even debatable --

and it's good that she went. I can understand why you wouldn't want

you're parents around, but, seeing that they'll probably be taking

care of you after the operation (and you'll want them to be,

otherwise post-op will be more miserable than I can imagine), it

would be nice for them to know what to expect afterwards; the

surgeon can give them a good idea of this.

You don't need to, obviously, but its only respectfull to give them

the oportunity. Maybe they'll have questions for the Doc that you

haven't thought of.

> I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with

my

> orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

arrange

> for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him

and

> the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing is

> that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

said

> parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

anyone

> else there, which I know is silly.

> I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both

of

> my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

> own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have

to

> be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

> continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt need

my

> parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon, so

I

> wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

them.

> Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

should

> take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

I am 41 years old and am THANKFUL to have my mom taking care of me,

i am 3 days post op. I can't imagine doing this by myself. I can,

however, appreciate you wanting to make a decision about the surgery

that you feel is right for you. As has been discussed on this site

by many, many of us have expressed having family and friends wonder

why we are even having the surgery done. So if you want to go

alone, that seems fine. However, I found it was nice to have a

second set of ears there listening to everything the doctors said.

Good luck.

> > I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment

with

> my

> > orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

> arrange

> > for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him

> and

> > the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing

is

> > that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

> said

> > parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> > appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

> anyone

> > else there, which I know is silly.

> > I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both

> of

> > my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on

my

> > own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont

have

> to

> > be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he

wont

> > continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt

need

> my

> > parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon,

so

> I

> > wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

> them.

> > Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

> should

> > take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> > Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

I would take the person with you that is going to help you through recovery.

This will prepare them with what to expect and what you will need post-op.

~Cathy

Consultation with surgeon and ortho

I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with my

orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would arrange

for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him and

the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing is

that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past said

parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want anyone

else there, which I know is silly.

I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both of

my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have to

be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt need my

parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon, so I

wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take them.

Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I should

take my parents, but I really dont want to.

Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

Your parents love you even though they might not always show it...

You need help to get through this. At least give them a chance to

help you.

I think you know in your heart the right thing to do, so do it...

You'll really hurt them if you shut them out on this.

Jay

> I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with

my

> orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

arrange

> for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him

and

> the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing is

> that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

said

> parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

anyone

> else there, which I know is silly.

> I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both

of

> my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

> own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have

to

> be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

> continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt need

my

> parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon, so

I

> wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

them.

> Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

should

> take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

I also dont want my parents with me for any consultations, this is

because, I have never been close to my parents, and at a previous

appointment, my ortho started asking about my feelings about the way

I look etc. and then he decided that because I couldnt answer him (I

wish i had), he decided that I should have an appointment with him

and that I should bring my parents,to discuss the surgery. Although,

I am guessing that from the look on my face, he added or " or a

friend, and he was right I didnt want my parents there when he was

going to be asking me how I feel about the way I look (also how I

look compaired to my friends!), it was bad enough him asking with no

one else there, I actually felt like getting up and running off,

(crazy huh?)but I didnt, I sat there listening, although I couldnt

say anything more that " dont know " !

Anyway, to get back to the point he wanted someone else there so that

there would be someone else there listening, who I could dicuss it

with later, also because they might remember something which I

didn't. I havnt had this appointment though, as at my last

appointment, with a dentist to get moulds taken for brigdes, the

dentist said that my ortho wanted to come down and talk to me, and

when he did come down he said about the appointment with my

parents/friend, and then he asked whether or not i had decided about

the surgery, and I said that yes I did want it, he then said that he

wants me to have an appointment with him and the surgeon, and also

with my parents or a friend. I have decided, that I am not going to

ask my parents, but i am going to get a friend to come with me.

Although I dont know which friend though, that is another decision I

have to make, but I have ages to make it as the apppointment wont be

for a few months!

So I agree that you should take a friend who you can discuss

everything with later.

Sorry this ended up being a bit long, but hope it helps you.

"

> > > I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment

> with

> > my

> > > orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

> > arrange

> > > for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him

> > and

> > > the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing

> is

> > > that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

> > said

> > > parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> > > appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

> > anyone

> > > else there, which I know is silly.

> > > I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or

both

> > of

> > > my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on

> my

> > > own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont

> have

> > to

> > > be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he

> wont

> > > continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt

> need

> > my

> > > parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon,

> so

> > I

> > > wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

> > them.

> > > Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

> > should

> > > take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> > > Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

Thankyou for all of your replies. I know I should just get over

myself and ask my parents, but I dont want them involved, and I cant

explain why, not even to myself! I suppose I could ask a friend, i

know someone who I could ask (an adult friend), but I dont know how

to go about it, and since this person is also friendly with my

parents, they might find out and then may not be very happy. I could

ask a friend my own age, and then if my parents found out then they

wouldnt care as much I suppose. I have actually thought about asking

this person, and i also thought about asking another adult friend who

I trust, but I dont know how to

> > > > I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment

> > with

> > > my

> > > > orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

> > > arrange

> > > > for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with

him

> > > and

> > > > the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The

thing

> > is

> > > > that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the

past

> > > said

> > > > parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> > > > appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont

want

> > > anyone

> > > > else there, which I know is silly.

> > > > I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or

> both

> > > of

> > > > my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go

on

> > my

> > > > own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont

> > have

> > > to

> > > > be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he

> > wont

> > > > continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt

> > need

> > > my

> > > > parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home

soon,

> > so

> > > I

> > > > wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should

take

> > > them.

> > > > Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that

I

> > > should

> > > > take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> > > > Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

I would say that you should take someone with you, as they may hear

something that you don't. You'll be anxious about the whole process

and might miss some stuff (unless of course you take really good

notes) that the doctors say. The person you take may also think of

some questions that you didn't come up with.

Good luck,

> I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with

my

> orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would arrange

> for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him and

> the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing is

> that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

said

> parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

anyone

> else there, which I know is silly.

> I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both of

> my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

> own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have

to

> be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

> continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt need

my

> parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon, so

I

> wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

them.

> Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

should

> take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> Thankyou.

[Guest guest]

Hi

This may be after the fact, but I am new here to this group as of

yesterday. I felt the same way about not having my mother with me

at the consultation (my father died when I was 2) I can't really

explain it either, although for me (at 26) I think the fact that she

never supported me had something to do with it. I really wanted it

done when I was your age, and younger, but she would always come up

with an excuse as to why I should wait etc. And I never had the

courage or know-how to go after it on my own.

I actually didn't know a parent or friend was supposed to be with me

at the consultation appt ~ she just happened to be the one I drove

down with and waited in the waiting room for me. The nurse was the

one to ask her to come in (which shocked me!) but I realized later

that it is b/c of what happens after the surgery. I need someone to

drive me home and to keep an eye on me etc. I've been very

independant, I moved out when I was your age and felt silly for

having my mother there ~ however I'm not married and really she is

the only one to help me through this. She is not protesting my

surgery, but has never supported me in any way and has tried to

discourage me.

I'm not sure of your situation, but I have a severe bite problem and

it affects everything in my life from the way I smile, talk, to the

way I eat and the way I look (as I'm sure many of the other members

can relate to) It is not only a physical problem but a major

emotional one as well, so I can't help but feel a slight grudge

against my mother for not supporting me in this for so long.

Especially when I see kids and teenagers all the time with braces to

straighten a couple teeth or fix a gap! Anyhow, I am just glad she

will be helping me through this in the end, and if your parents are

going to be the ones looking after you when you recover from the

surgery then it is a good idea to have them there at the consult.

> I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with

my

> orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

arrange

> for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him

and

> the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing is

> that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

said

> parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

anyone

> else there, which I know is silly.

> I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both

of

> my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

> own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have

to

> be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

> continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt need

my

> parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon, so

I

> wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

them.

> Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

should

> take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> Thankyou.