Reply to Consult w/surgeon and ortho -- sorry for the length

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Hmmm. Is there something else going on here? If you have a reason --

and I mean a REAL reason, such as your parents abusing you, verbally,

emotionally or otherwise -- maybe you don't want them there. Or if

they are disinterested, or opposed to the procedure. (although docs

can do amazing things to help with oppositional families. They've

seen it all before, and it's nothing to be embarrassed about. Matter

of fact, I don't believe docs get embarrassed, ever, about anything

medical, so ask anything you want. It will not be the first time the

doc has heard the question, I promise you.)

It is certainly possible to do the consultation without; I did. But I

was 56, paying for my own insurance which paid for my surgery, and

tending to the financial aspects of my care myself. (I notice that

you do not address the issue of how this very expensive (to me,

anyhow) set of procedures is being managed. Which I find, um, odd.

Maybe your parents are distant, maybe they don't want to be

involved.)

And NO. I AM NOT ASKING YOU TO EXPLAIN ANY OF THIS HERE OR TO ANYONE

ELSE, except if I were your ortho and/or surgeon, I'd want to know.

And I think that if you do have a reason, it would be wise to explain

to one, the other, or both.

So. All that said. I was driven to the hospital and picked up and

delivered home by a dear, wonderful friend. (Who else would take you

to the hospital at 12:01 a.m., not to mention treating you to dinner

and a funny movie first? Then come back to fetch you whilst she was

in considerable, unmentioned, pain from a minor surgical procedure,

herself. And going on a trip in a car with grandchildren the next

day! Amazing, delightful person. Generous, too. I hope you have such

friends.)

You will probably need someone who will pick you up from the

hospital, take you home and sign some sort of statement of

responsibility for you after surgery. (Here, one must do that after

something as simple as oral surgery to remove wizzies, or a

colonoscopy -- unrelated to dental matters, but requiring light

sedation. The hospital and docs don't want to be sued if you have a

traffic accident, or slip, on the way back to the bedroom.)Best for

your surgeon to have some awareness of that person. (In my case, she

turned out to be the mom of a best friend of one of my surgeon's

partners, who assisted on my surgery.)

I had excellent care, and no complications, after a simple op, in the

hospital. I had a beloved waiting for me at home, and willing to be

available or get help if I needed it. (I didn't.)

It's a good idea to have another set of ears there. Is there a friend

who can go with you, to do less emotional listening, and serve as

your memory, while you're talking?

I took a small tape recorder, showed it to my surgeon, and asked if

he minded my recording our session. (I'm a newspaper reporter, so

also assured him that it was for my reference only.) Under those

circumstances, I have yet to have a doc refuse my request. I've done

it three times, now, for different procedures, and each time it has

been comforting to me to listen to the tape as the time got closer.

Helped my aging memory, too -- which is a problem you don't have! ;~)

I'm not going to be responsible for you. Not going to take care of

you post-op (and there are things that whoever will be will need to

know how to help you with, in all probability, including such basic

essentials as, possibly, breathing, eating and sleeping, all of which

will be crucial.) It's a pretty good idea for someone else to have

pre-op contact with the surgeon, too, in case you do have a trouble

and you need for your doc to get a call. Especially if you're to be

wired closed.

Must this person be a parent? Nope. If your feeling is

really " silly, " (Your word, not mine) then I think it's sort of cruel

to put your parents in this spot. If it's not " silly, " I hope you

will take whoever will be your caregiver along with you for the

opportunity for information. That's the part that I think is really

important.

I wish you kindly well, and hope that you have as smooth a passage

through all this as I did. It sounds to me as though you have enough

other troubles and issues going on, without complications about this.

Cammie

> > I know that this is really silly, but at my last appointment with

> my

> > orthodontist, he said that at my next appointment, he would

> arrange

> > for me to meet the surgeon. It will be an appointment with him

> and

> > the surgeon, and je mentioned my parents being there. The thing

is

> > that, I dont was either of my parents there, he has in the past

> said

> > parents or a friend,(my mum has been to 2 or 3 orthodontic

> > appointments, but surgery wasnt dicussed then) but I dont want

> anyone

> > else there, which I know is silly.

> > I would like your opinions on this, should I take my one or both

> of

> > my parents (which I really dont want to do), or should I go on my

> > own, as I know that I want this surgery, and my parents dont have

> to

> > be involved. It is not as if my orthodontist can say that he wont

> > continue with the treatment, as I am 17 and 1/2, so he doesnt

need

> my

> > parents consent, plus I am going to be moving out of home soon,

so

> I

> > wont see my parents very often, so I dont see why I should take

> them.

> > Hope some of you can offer some advice, although I know that I

> should

> > take my parents, but I really dont want to.

> > Thankyou.