Guest guest Posted August 13, 2001 Report Share Posted August 13, 2001 Subject: PONDER THESE 1. Definition of a teenager? God's punishment for enjoying sex. 2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be ! 3. The difference between the Pope and your boss. The Pope only expects you to kiss his ring. 4. My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone. 5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom. 6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once, the seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well it really chilled her mood. 7. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too. 8. A husband is someone who after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house. 9. My next house will have no kitchen---just vending machines and a large trash can. 10. The only thing wrong with a beautiful drive to work is that you still end up at work. 11. A blonde said, " I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn-signal fluid. " 12. I'm so depressed... My Dr. refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building. 13. Clinton is in the supermarket picking up some things for the new office when a stock boy accidentally bumps into him. " Pardon me, " the stock boy says. " Sure, " Clinton replies, " but it'll cost you. " 14. , Jim Bakker, and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book ... It's called: " Ministers Do More Than Lay People. " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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