Guest guest Posted August 11, 2005 Report Share Posted August 11, 2005 Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad that you heard what I said and not took offense. I did not think that you would but just in case I just wanted to let you know that I would be open to any response to whatever either you or Tamara had to say because I know from you when you say stuff it is said with love and that is how it should be received and I do. I hope you have a great day honey! Pam Marsh --- Francisco gemellodigiovanni@...> wrote: > Pam: > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I > appreciate your > perspective, and I always learn from your point of > view. > > That's one more thing I've learned about this > process: when someone > is sincere in their words (like I can tell you are), > I need to listen > because we all have lessons to teach each other, > even when we think > we know all the answers. > > Francisco > > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco and I am > glad > > we had this communication. I understand > everything > > that you said and why you said it. I am happy for > > you. I wish you continued success. Thanks for > being > > open to my comments. > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 11, 2005 Report Share Posted August 11, 2005 Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully Francisco will not take offense to what I said either... But again, I speak from my heart. Pam b Pamela A Marsh wrote: Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad that youheard what I said and not took offense. I did notthink that you would but just in case I just wanted tolet you know that I would be open to any response towhatever either you or Tamara had to say because Iknow from you when you say stuff it is said with loveand that is how it should be received and I do.I hope you have a great day honey!Pam Marsh--- Francisco wrote:> Pam:> > I would never go off on you! As I said, I> appreciate your > perspective, and I always learn from your point of> view.> > That's one more thing I've learned about this> process: when someone > is sincere in their words (like I can tell you are),> I need to listen > because we all have lessons to teach each other,> even when we think > we know all the answers.> > Francisco> > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco and I am> glad> > we had this communication. I understand> everything> > that you said and why you said it. I am happy for> > you. I wish you continued success. Thanks for> being> > open to my comments.> > > > Pam Marsh> > > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 11, 2005 Report Share Posted August 11, 2005 Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is a very loving, kind, generous man. He really is and he is so full of so much knowledge. That is what makes Francisco so special. He realizes that in any relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom to come and go, freedom to give or not give and more importantly, freedom to express yourself. No worries honey. As my little son would say...everything is back to normal. Pam Marsh --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully Francisco > will not take offense to what I said either... > But again, I speak from my heart. > > Pam b > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> wrote: > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad that > you > heard what I said and not took offense. I did not > think that you would but just in case I just wanted > to > let you know that I would be open to any response to > whatever either you or Tamara had to say because I > know from you when you say stuff it is said with > love > and that is how it should be received and I do. > > I hope you have a great day honey! > > > Pam Marsh > > --- Francisco gemellodigiovanni@...> wrote: > > > Pam: > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I > > appreciate your > > perspective, and I always learn from your point of > > view. > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about this > > process: when someone > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell you > are), > > I need to listen > > because we all have lessons to teach each other, > > even when we think > > we know all the answers. > > > > Francisco > > > > > > > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco and I > am > > glad > > > we had this communication. I understand > > everything > > > that you said and why you said it. I am happy > for > > > you. I wish you continued success. Thanks for > > being > > > open to my comments. > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 11, 2005 Report Share Posted August 11, 2005 Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind, generous and loving person. I am constantly impressed by your compassion and humility. I hope that when I get to experience life as a " normal weighted " person, I turn out to be just like you! Pam b --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> wrote: > Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is a > very loving, kind, generous man. He really is and > he > is so full of so much knowledge. That is what makes > Francisco so special. He realizes that in any > relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom to > come > and go, freedom to give or not give and more > importantly, freedom to express yourself. No > worries > honey. As my little son would say...everything is > back to normal. > > Pam Marsh > > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully > Francisco > > will not take offense to what I said either... > > But again, I speak from my heart. > > > > Pam b > > > > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > wrote: > > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad that > > you > > heard what I said and not took offense. I did not > > think that you would but just in case I just > wanted > > to > > let you know that I would be open to any response > to > > whatever either you or Tamara had to say because I > > know from you when you say stuff it is said with > > love > > and that is how it should be received and I do. > > > > I hope you have a great day honey! > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > --- Francisco gemellodigiovanni@...> wrote: > > > > > Pam: > > > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I > > > appreciate your > > > perspective, and I always learn from your point > of > > > view. > > > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about this > > > process: when someone > > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell you > > are), > > > I need to listen > > > because we all have lessons to teach each other, > > > even when we think > > > we know all the answers. > > > > > > Francisco > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco and I > > am > > > glad > > > > we had this communication. I understand > > > everything > > > > that you said and why you said it. I am happy > > for > > > > you. I wish you continued success. Thanks > for > > > being > > > > open to my comments. > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see this from your responses here. Don't ever throw that away, rather embrace it. Thank you so much for your compliments and if I don't always say thank you its because I am still transitioning on this journey and one of the biggest things that Robynn has been working with me on is learning to accept compliments. It is so hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose when nice things are said, I filter it and try to convince myself that what has been said to me is the truth. I am learning that its okay to receive compliments and believe that its the truth. Its hard when you have grown up with negativity. Its hard when your parent has done nothing but convinced you all your life that you will never be anything or anyone. That you will amount to nothing. Its really hard when you are constantly being called stupid, ignorant and you are never encouraged. Its hard when you have certain talents and gifts and when an organization see them and tell your parent that they are going to pay for you to go to a major school of arts so that you can master your talent/skill and she says no (even when she does not have to pay for any of it and all you have to do is report to the school). This is what I have endured as a child and unless you get help for when it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to break free from that sort of thinking. So, I take it one comment at a time. I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer and support, I will get there. Pam Marsh --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind, > generous > and loving person. I am constantly impressed by your > compassion and humility. I hope that when I get to > experience life as a " normal weighted " person, I > turn > out to be just like you! > > Pam b > > --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > wrote: > > > Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is a > > very loving, kind, generous man. He really is and > > he > > is so full of so much knowledge. That is what > makes > > Francisco so special. He realizes that in any > > relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom to > > come > > and go, freedom to give or not give and more > > importantly, freedom to express yourself. No > > worries > > honey. As my little son would say...everything is > > back to normal. > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > > > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully > > Francisco > > > will not take offense to what I said either... > > > But again, I speak from my heart. > > > > > > Pam b > > > > > > > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > > wrote: > > > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad > that > > > you > > > heard what I said and not took offense. I did > not > > > think that you would but just in case I just > > wanted > > > to > > > let you know that I would be open to any > response > > to > > > whatever either you or Tamara had to say because > I > > > know from you when you say stuff it is said with > > > love > > > and that is how it should be received and I do. > > > > > > I hope you have a great day honey! > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > --- Francisco gemellodigiovanni@...> > wrote: > > > > > > > Pam: > > > > > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I > > > > appreciate your > > > > perspective, and I always learn from your > point > > of > > > > view. > > > > > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about this > > > > process: when someone > > > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell you > > > are), > > > > I need to listen > > > > because we all have lessons to teach each > other, > > > > even when we think > > > > we know all the answers. > > > > > > > > Francisco > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco and > I > > > am > > > > glad > > > > > we had this communication. I understand > > > > everything > > > > > that you said and why you said it. I am > happy > > > for > > > > > you. I wish you continued success. Thanks > > for > > > > being > > > > > open to my comments. > > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 Baby Pam....what is your fine art talents? You are just a treasure trove of lovely secrets!!! As for the acceptance of compliments...I was always Ms. Self-deprecation. Couldn't ever accept a compliment, God forbid I should acknowledge any gift or talent I had. And let's not even think about beauty and believing that some people find me attractive. But, always, echoing in my memory was this girl I went to high school with. Her name was Marisa, and she was absolutely, enchantingly beautiful...physically, spiritually and emotionally. Truly mesmerizing. We worked together, and were good friends. One day, I noticed that every time she was complimented (frequently, because of her vast beauty and charm), she looked at the person with sincere gratitude, and said, "Thank you!!!" in a sweet and enthusiastic way. She accepted the compliment graciously...and by accepting it, it caused her to glow...instead of blush and stammer and grumble, the way compliments affected me. This always stayed with me, and I decided to try and learn to be more like her in this way. A compliment is a gift given to us by others, and we should make the gift giver feel good for giving it. It is just the gracious thing to do. My cousin, also a very beautiful and charming girl, has mastered the art of self-love. She holds some insecurity, for sure. But, I would always marvel when she would describe an event to which she had gone, and she would say, "And, of course...I was dressed adorably!" or "And if I must say, I was devastatingly gorgeous that night!" She says it with humor...but those words (positive ones) go into her subconscious, and give her positive self-talk. And as a result, she has a serene confidence that I admire. Accept the gift of admiration with grace. And give it to yourself, as well. We all deserve to be loved. Especially by ourselves. There are many in this world who would seek to tear us down, out of selfishness, jealousy, pain, or just plain old meanness. Let's not add fuel to that fire. Remember Saturday Night Live, and Al el? His, "Stuart, you are kind, charming, and a good person, and darn it! People like you." He'd look in a mirror while he said it. Well, it may have been a spoof on self-affirmation...but darn it! I think it's a good thing to do. My two cents. RobynnPamela A Marsh wrote: Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see thisfrom your responses here. Don't ever throw that away,rather embrace it. Thank you so much for yourcompliments and if I don't always say thank you itsbecause I am still transitioning on this journey andone of the biggest things that Robynn has been workingwith me on is learning to accept compliments. It isso hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose whennice things are said, I filter it and try to convincemyself that what has been said to me is the truth. Iam learning that its okay to receive compliments andbelieve that its the truth. Its hard when you havegrown up with negativity. Its hard when your parenthas done nothing but convinced you all your life thatyou will never be anything or anyone. That you willamount to nothing. Its really hard when you areconstantly being called stupid, ignorant and you arenever encouraged. Its hard when you have certaintalents and gifts and when an organization see themand tell your parent that they are going to pay foryou to go to a major school of arts so that you canmaster your talent/skill and she says no (even whenshe does not have to pay for any of it and all youhave to do is report to the school). This is what Ihave endured as a child and unless you get help forwhen it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to breakfree from that sort of thinking. So, I take it onecomment at a time.I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer andsupport, I will get there.Pam Marsh--- Pamela wrote:> Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind,> generous> and loving person. I am constantly impressed by your> compassion and humility. I hope that when I get to> experience life as a "normal weighted" person, I> turn> out to be just like you! > > Pam b> > --- Pamela A Marsh > wrote:> > > Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is a> > very loving, kind, generous man. He really is and> > he> > is so full of so much knowledge. That is what> makes> > Francisco so special. He realizes that in any> > relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom to> > come> > and go, freedom to give or not give and more> > importantly, freedom to express yourself. No> > worries> > honey. As my little son would say...everything is> > back to normal.> > > > Pam Marsh> > > > --- Pamela wrote:> > > > > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully> > Francisco> > > will not take offense to what I said either...> > > But again, I speak from my heart.> > > > > > Pam b> > > > > > > > > Pamela A Marsh > > wrote:> > > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad> that> > > you> > > heard what I said and not took offense. I did> not> > > think that you would but just in case I just> > wanted> > > to> > > let you know that I would be open to any> response> > to> > > whatever either you or Tamara had to say because> I> > > know from you when you say stuff it is said with> > > love> > > and that is how it should be received and I do.> > > > > > I hope you have a great day honey!> > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh> > > > > > --- Francisco > wrote:> > > > > > > Pam:> > > > > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I> > > > appreciate your > > > > perspective, and I always learn from your> point> > of> > > > view.> > > > > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about this> > > > process: when someone > > > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell you> > > are),> > > > I need to listen > > > > because we all have lessons to teach each> other,> > > > even when we think > > > > we know all the answers.> > > > > > > > Francisco> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco and> I> > > am> > > > glad> > > > > we had this communication. I understand> > > > everything> > > > > that you said and why you said it. I am> happy> > > for> > > > > you. I wish you continued success. Thanks> > for> > > > being> > > > > open to my comments.> > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >> __________________________________________________> > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 Well Robynn, as a child, I loved to dance. I don't care if I was in K-Mart, Target, you could always find me somewhere twirling around to the music they would be playing in the store. My mother would just say you are really working my nervous why can't you ever just stand still (lol). Anyway, I enjoyed seeing the ballerinas and I would watch that show called Fame. When I got in 7th grade we would have PE (physical education) and three days out of five would be free day (do whatever as long as it was something physical). Some of us would do jazzercise, aerobics while others would run, play basket ball, etc. I chose the jazzercise. At the end of class when the floor would clear, I would put on a song and I would make combinations (dance routines)right there. I never knew that I was being watched. Sometimes I would stay after school and go into the gym and just dance. Once day the teacher called me aside and said we have been watching you and we want to send you to the North Carolina School of Fine Arts for dance (right there in Raliegh North Carolina). It was a dream come true. She explained I would be taking my regular classes and that my school would pay for it. So my dream was crushed because my mother said no. But oh well. Also, I love to sing. I can't really sing like Keys or anything but I can carry a tune. One of the other things I used to do and I keep saying I would start back is writing poetry. So there you have it. Three of my hidden talents. I love art (paintings, sculptures). I like abstract art though. So if you guys know of any art galleries local, by all means let me know. Thanks. Pam Marsh --- Robynn VanPatten robynnsf@...> wrote: > Baby Pam....what is your fine art talents? You are > just a treasure trove of lovely secrets!!! > > As for the acceptance of compliments...I was always > Ms. Self-deprecation. Couldn't ever accept a > compliment, God forbid I should acknowledge any gift > or talent I had. And let's not even think about > beauty and believing that some people find me > attractive. > > But, always, echoing in my memory was this girl I > went to high school with. Her name was Marisa, and > she was absolutely, enchantingly > beautiful...physically, spiritually and emotionally. > Truly mesmerizing. We worked together, and were > good friends. One day, I noticed that every time > she was complimented (frequently, because of her > vast beauty and charm), she looked at the person > with sincere gratitude, and said, " Thank you!!! " in > a sweet and enthusiastic way. She accepted the > compliment graciously...and by accepting it, it > caused her to glow...instead of blush and stammer > and grumble, the way compliments affected me. This > always stayed with me, and I decided to try and > learn to be more like her in this way. A compliment > is a gift given to us by others, and we should make > the gift giver feel good for giving it. It is just > the gracious thing to do. > > My cousin, also a very beautiful and charming girl, > has mastered the art of self-love. She holds some > insecurity, for sure. But, I would always marvel > when she would describe an event to which she had > gone, and she would say, " And, of course...I was > dressed adorably! " or " And if I must say, I was > devastatingly gorgeous that night! " She says it > with humor...but those words (positive ones) go into > her subconscious, and give her positive self-talk. > And as a result, she has a serene confidence that I > admire. > > Accept the gift of admiration with grace. And give > it to yourself, as well. We all deserve to be > loved. Especially by ourselves. There are many in > this world who would seek to tear us down, out of > selfishness, jealousy, pain, or just plain old > meanness. Let's not add fuel to that fire. > > Remember Saturday Night Live, and Al el? His, > " Stuart, you are kind, charming, and a good person, > and darn it! People like you. " He'd look in a > mirror while he said it. Well, it may have been a > spoof on self-affirmation...but darn it! I think > it's a good thing to do. > > My two cents. > Robynn > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> wrote: > Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see this > from your responses here. Don't ever throw that > away, > rather embrace it. Thank you so much for your > compliments and if I don't always say thank you its > because I am still transitioning on this journey and > one of the biggest things that Robynn has been > working > with me on is learning to accept compliments. It is > so hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose > when > nice things are said, I filter it and try to > convince > myself that what has been said to me is the truth. > I > am learning that its okay to receive compliments and > believe that its the truth. Its hard when you have > grown up with negativity. Its hard when your parent > has done nothing but convinced you all your life > that > you will never be anything or anyone. That you will > amount to nothing. Its really hard when you are > constantly being called stupid, ignorant and you are > never encouraged. Its hard when you have certain > talents and gifts and when an organization see them > and tell your parent that they are going to pay for > you to go to a major school of arts so that you can > master your talent/skill and she says no (even when > she does not have to pay for any of it and all you > have to do is report to the school). This is what I > have endured as a child and unless you get help for > when it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to > break > free from that sort of thinking. So, I take it one > comment at a time. > > I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer and > support, I will get there. > > Pam Marsh > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind, > > generous > > and loving person. I am constantly impressed by > your > > compassion and humility. I hope that when I get to > > experience life as a " normal weighted " person, I > > turn > > out to be just like you! > > > > Pam b > > > > --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > > wrote: > > > > > Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is > a > > > very loving, kind, generous man. He really is > and > > > he > > > is so full of so much knowledge. That is what > > makes > > > Francisco so special. He realizes that in any > > > relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom > to > > > come > > > and go, freedom to give or not give and more > > > importantly, freedom to express yourself. No > > > worries > > > honey. As my little son would say...everything > is > > > back to normal. > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > > > > > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully > > > Francisco > > > > will not take offense to what I said either... > > > > But again, I speak from my heart. > > > > > > > > Pam b > > > > > > > > > > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > > > wrote: > > > > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad > > that > > > > you > > > > heard what I said and not took offense. I did > > not > > > > think that you would but just in case I just > > > wanted > > > > to > > > > let you know that I would be open to any > > response > > > to > > > > whatever either you or Tamara had to say > because > > I > > > > know from you when you say stuff it is said > with > > > > love > > > > and that is how it should be received and I > do. > > > > > > > > I hope you have a great day honey! > > > > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > > > --- Francisco gemellodigiovanni@...> > > wrote: > > > > > > > > > Pam: > > > > > > > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I > > > > > appreciate your > > > > > perspective, and I always learn from your > > point > > > of > > > > > view. > > > > > > > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about > this > > > > > process: when someone > > > > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell > you > > > > are), > > > > > I need to listen > > > > > because we all have lessons to teach each > > other, > > > > > even when we think > > > > > we know all the answers. > > > > > > > > > > Francisco > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --- In > === message truncated === __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 Wow! My little ballerina. I'm so sad that your mom said no. Was it because she didn't want you too far away? That's really too bad...I wonder what your life would be like if you had gone? I'm sure you think of that all of the time. Ever go to the Modern Art Museum in SF? Plenty of abstract art there... RobynnPamela A Marsh wrote: Well Robynn, as a child, I loved to dance. I don'tcare if I was in K-Mart, Target, you could always findme somewhere twirling around to the music they wouldbe playing in the store.My mother would just say you are really working mynervous why can't you ever just stand still (lol). Anyway, I enjoyed seeing the ballerinas and I wouldwatch that show called Fame. When I got in 7th gradewe would have PE (physical education) and three daysout of five would be free day (do whatever as long asit was something physical). Some of us would dojazzercise, aerobics while others would run, playbasket ball, etc. I chose the jazzercise. At the endof class when the floor would clear, I would put on asong and I would make combinations (danceroutines)right there. I never knew that I was beingwatched. Sometimes I would stay after school and gointo the gym and just dance. Once day the teachercalled me aside and said we have been watching you andwe want to send you to the North Carolina School ofFine Arts for dance (right there in Raliegh NorthCarolina). It was a dream come true. She explained Iwould be taking my regular classes and that my schoolwould pay for it. So my dream was crushed because mymother said no. But oh well. Also, I love to sing. I can't really sing like Keys or anything but Ican carry a tune. One of the other things I used todo and I keep saying I would start back is writingpoetry. So there you have it. Three of my hiddentalents. I love art (paintings, sculptures). I likeabstract art though. So if you guys know of any artgalleries local, by all means let me know. Thanks.Pam Marsh--- Robynn VanPatten wrote:> Baby Pam....what is your fine art talents? You are> just a treasure trove of lovely secrets!!!> > As for the acceptance of compliments...I was always> Ms. Self-deprecation. Couldn't ever accept a> compliment, God forbid I should acknowledge any gift> or talent I had. And let's not even think about> beauty and believing that some people find me> attractive.> > But, always, echoing in my memory was this girl I> went to high school with. Her name was Marisa, and> she was absolutely, enchantingly> beautiful...physically, spiritually and emotionally.> Truly mesmerizing. We worked together, and were> good friends. One day, I noticed that every time> she was complimented (frequently, because of her> vast beauty and charm), she looked at the person> with sincere gratitude, and said, "Thank you!!!" in> a sweet and enthusiastic way. She accepted the> compliment graciously...and by accepting it, it> caused her to glow...instead of blush and stammer> and grumble, the way compliments affected me. This> always stayed with me, and I decided to try and> learn to be more like her in this way. A compliment> is a gift given to us by others, and we should make> the gift giver feel good for giving it. It is just> the gracious thing to do.> > My cousin, also a very beautiful and charming girl,> has mastered the art of self-love. She holds some> insecurity, for sure. But, I would always marvel> when she would describe an event to which she had> gone, and she would say, "And, of course...I was> dressed adorably!" or "And if I must say, I was> devastatingly gorgeous that night!" She says it> with humor...but those words (positive ones) go into> her subconscious, and give her positive self-talk. > And as a result, she has a serene confidence that I> admire.> > Accept the gift of admiration with grace. And give> it to yourself, as well. We all deserve to be> loved. Especially by ourselves. There are many in> this world who would seek to tear us down, out of> selfishness, jealousy, pain, or just plain old> meanness. Let's not add fuel to that fire. > > Remember Saturday Night Live, and Al el? His,> "Stuart, you are kind, charming, and a good person,> and darn it! People like you." He'd look in a> mirror while he said it. Well, it may have been a> spoof on self-affirmation...but darn it! I think> it's a good thing to do.> > My two cents.> Robynn> > Pamela A Marsh wrote:> Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see this> from your responses here. Don't ever throw that> away,> rather embrace it. Thank you so much for your> compliments and if I don't always say thank you its> because I am still transitioning on this journey and> one of the biggest things that Robynn has been> working> with me on is learning to accept compliments. It is> so hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose> when> nice things are said, I filter it and try to> convince> myself that what has been said to me is the truth. > I> am learning that its okay to receive compliments and> believe that its the truth. Its hard when you have> grown up with negativity. Its hard when your parent> has done nothing but convinced you all your life> that> you will never be anything or anyone. That you will> amount to nothing. Its really hard when you are> constantly being called stupid, ignorant and you are> never encouraged. Its hard when you have certain> talents and gifts and when an organization see them> and tell your parent that they are going to pay for> you to go to a major school of arts so that you can> master your talent/skill and she says no (even when> she does not have to pay for any of it and all you> have to do is report to the school). This is what I> have endured as a child and unless you get help for> when it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to> break> free from that sort of thinking. So, I take it one> comment at a time.> > I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer and> support, I will get there.> > Pam Marsh> --- Pamela wrote:> > > Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind,> > generous> > and loving person. I am constantly impressed by> your> > compassion and humility. I hope that when I get to> > experience life as a "normal weighted" person, I> > turn> > out to be just like you! > > > > Pam b> > > > --- Pamela A Marsh > > wrote:> > > > > Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is> a> > > very loving, kind, generous man. He really is> and> > > he> > > is so full of so much knowledge. That is what> > makes> > > Francisco so special. He realizes that in any> > > relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom> to> > > come> > > and go, freedom to give or not give and more> > > importantly, freedom to express yourself. No> > > worries> > > honey. As my little son would say...everything> is> > > back to normal.> > > > > > Pam Marsh> > > > > > --- Pamela wrote:> > > > > > > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully> > > Francisco> > > > will not take offense to what I said either...> > > > But again, I speak from my heart.> > > > > > > > Pam b> > > > > > > > > > > > Pamela A Marsh > > > wrote:> > > > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad> > that> > > > you> > > > heard what I said and not took offense. I did> > not> > > > think that you would but just in case I just> > > wanted> > > > to> > > > let you know that I would be open to any> > response> > > to> > > > whatever either you or Tamara had to say> because> > I> > > > know from you when you say stuff it is said> with> > > > love> > > > and that is how it should be received and I> do.> > > > > > > > I hope you have a great day honey!> > > > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh> > > > > > > > --- Francisco > > wrote:> > > > > > > > > Pam:> > > > > > > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I> > > > > appreciate your > > > > > perspective, and I always learn from your> > point> > > of> > > > > view.> > > > > > > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about> this> > > > > process: when someone > > > > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell> you> > > > are),> > > > > I need to listen > > > > > because we all have lessons to teach each> > other,> > > > > even when we think > > > > > we know all the answers.> > > > > > > > > > Francisco> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --- In> === message truncated ===__________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 My mother was bitter...bad divorce (married at 15 and had two kids by the time she was 17 - lost 3 before that). My dad left her for someone else and it is as if she was always trying to punish me and my sister because of my dad. I say that because my grandmother would always tell her that she can not take her frustrations out on me and my sister. I lived 20-30 mintues from this school of arts. I don't know the reason and I do wonder about it but I won't let it hender my progress on this journey. Whats gone is gone. I can always take dances classes. As for the museum, no I have not been there but just as soon as I sent the mail, I printed out a listing of museums so I will start with that list and check out this one to. Thanks Robynn. --- Robynn VanPatten robynnsf@...> wrote: > Wow! My little ballerina. I'm so sad that your > mom said no. Was it because she didn't want you too > far away? That's really too bad...I wonder what > your life would be like if you had gone? I'm sure > you think of that all of the time. > > Ever go to the Modern Art Museum in SF? Plenty of > abstract art there... > Robynn > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> wrote: > Well Robynn, as a child, I loved to dance. I don't > care if I was in K-Mart, Target, you could always > find > me somewhere twirling around to the music they would > be playing in the store. > > My mother would just say you are really working my > nervous why can't you ever just stand still (lol). > Anyway, I enjoyed seeing the ballerinas and I would > watch that show called Fame. When I got in 7th > grade > we would have PE (physical education) and three days > out of five would be free day (do whatever as long > as > it was something physical). Some of us would do > jazzercise, aerobics while others would run, play > basket ball, etc. I chose the jazzercise. At the > end > of class when the floor would clear, I would put on > a > song and I would make combinations (dance > routines)right there. I never knew that I was being > watched. Sometimes I would stay after school and go > into the gym and just dance. Once day the teacher > called me aside and said we have been watching you > and > we want to send you to the North Carolina School of > Fine Arts for dance (right there in Raliegh North > Carolina). It was a dream come true. She explained > I > would be taking my regular classes and that my > school > would pay for it. So my dream was crushed because my > mother said no. But oh well. Also, I love to sing. > > I can't really sing like Keys or anything but > I > can carry a tune. One of the other things I used to > do and I keep saying I would start back is writing > poetry. So there you have it. Three of my hidden > talents. I love art (paintings, sculptures). I > like > abstract art though. So if you guys know of any art > galleries local, by all means let me know. Thanks. > > Pam Marsh > > --- Robynn VanPatten robynnsf@...> wrote: > > > Baby Pam....what is your fine art talents? You > are > > just a treasure trove of lovely secrets!!! > > > > As for the acceptance of compliments...I was > always > > Ms. Self-deprecation. Couldn't ever accept a > > compliment, God forbid I should acknowledge any > gift > > or talent I had. And let's not even think about > > beauty and believing that some people find me > > attractive. > > > > But, always, echoing in my memory was this girl I > > went to high school with. Her name was Marisa, > and > > she was absolutely, enchantingly > > beautiful...physically, spiritually and > emotionally. > > Truly mesmerizing. We worked together, and were > > good friends. One day, I noticed that every time > > she was complimented (frequently, because of her > > vast beauty and charm), she looked at the person > > with sincere gratitude, and said, " Thank you!!! " > in > > a sweet and enthusiastic way. She accepted the > > compliment graciously...and by accepting it, it > > caused her to glow...instead of blush and stammer > > and grumble, the way compliments affected me. > This > > always stayed with me, and I decided to try and > > learn to be more like her in this way. A > compliment > > is a gift given to us by others, and we should > make > > the gift giver feel good for giving it. It is > just > > the gracious thing to do. > > > > My cousin, also a very beautiful and charming > girl, > > has mastered the art of self-love. She holds some > > insecurity, for sure. But, I would always marvel > > when she would describe an event to which she had > > gone, and she would say, " And, of course...I was > > dressed adorably! " or " And if I must say, I was > > devastatingly gorgeous that night! " She says it > > with humor...but those words (positive ones) go > into > > her subconscious, and give her positive self-talk. > > > And as a result, she has a serene confidence that > I > > admire. > > > > Accept the gift of admiration with grace. And > give > > it to yourself, as well. We all deserve to be > > loved. Especially by ourselves. There are many > in > > this world who would seek to tear us down, out of > > selfishness, jealousy, pain, or just plain old > > meanness. Let's not add fuel to that fire. > > > > Remember Saturday Night Live, and Al el? > His, > > " Stuart, you are kind, charming, and a good > person, > > and darn it! People like you. " He'd look in a > > mirror while he said it. Well, it may have been a > > spoof on self-affirmation...but darn it! I think > > it's a good thing to do. > > > > My two cents. > > Robynn > > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > wrote: > > Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see this > > from your responses here. Don't ever throw that > > away, > > rather embrace it. Thank you so much for your > > compliments and if I don't always say thank you > its > > because I am still transitioning on this journey > and > > one of the biggest things that Robynn has been > > working > > with me on is learning to accept compliments. It > is > > so hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose > > when > > nice things are said, I filter it and try to > > convince > > myself that what has been said to me is the truth. > > > I > > am learning that its okay to receive compliments > and > > believe that its the truth. Its hard when you > have > > grown up with negativity. Its hard when your > parent > > has done nothing but convinced you all your life > > that > > you will never be anything or anyone. That you > will > > amount to nothing. Its really hard when you are > > constantly being called stupid, ignorant and you > are > > never encouraged. Its hard when you have certain > > talents and gifts and when an organization see > them > > and tell your parent that they are going to pay > for > > you to go to a major school of arts so that you > can > > master your talent/skill and she says no (even > when > > she does not have to pay for any of it and all you > > have to do is report to the school). This is what > I > > have endured as a child and unless you get help > for > > when it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to > > break > > free from that sort of thinking. So, I take it > one > > comment at a time. > > > > I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer > and > > support, I will get there. > > > > Pam Marsh > > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > > > Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind, > > > generous > > > and loving person. I am constantly impressed by > > your > === message truncated === __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 Once again, Pam, I am in awe of you. I am so sorry for the hardships that you have endured. You are truly a beautiful person, though. (I wonder if it was because of those hardships that you turned out to be so wise and compassionate?) Pam b --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> wrote: > Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see this > from your responses here. Don't ever throw that > away, > rather embrace it. Thank you so much for your > compliments and if I don't always say thank you its > because I am still transitioning on this journey and > one of the biggest things that Robynn has been > working > with me on is learning to accept compliments. It is > so hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose > when > nice things are said, I filter it and try to > convince > myself that what has been said to me is the truth. > I > am learning that its okay to receive compliments and > believe that its the truth. Its hard when you have > grown up with negativity. Its hard when your parent > has done nothing but convinced you all your life > that > you will never be anything or anyone. That you will > amount to nothing. Its really hard when you are > constantly being called stupid, ignorant and you are > never encouraged. Its hard when you have certain > talents and gifts and when an organization see them > and tell your parent that they are going to pay for > you to go to a major school of arts so that you can > master your talent/skill and she says no (even when > she does not have to pay for any of it and all you > have to do is report to the school). This is what I > have endured as a child and unless you get help for > when it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to > break > free from that sort of thinking. So, I take it one > comment at a time. > > I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer and > support, I will get there. > > Pam Marsh > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind, > > generous > > and loving person. I am constantly impressed by > your > > compassion and humility. I hope that when I get to > > experience life as a " normal weighted " person, I > > turn > > out to be just like you! > > > > Pam b > > > > --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > > wrote: > > > > > Pam, I don't believe that Francisco will. He is > a > > > very loving, kind, generous man. He really is > and > > > he > > > is so full of so much knowledge. That is what > > makes > > > Francisco so special. He realizes that in any > > > relationship there has to be freedom. Freedom > to > > > come > > > and go, freedom to give or not give and more > > > importantly, freedom to express yourself. No > > > worries > > > honey. As my little son would say...everything > is > > > back to normal. > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > > > > > Thanks for this post, again. And hopefully > > > Francisco > > > > will not take offense to what I said either... > > > > But again, I speak from my heart. > > > > > > > > Pam b > > > > > > > > > > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > > > wrote: > > > > Oh sweetie, thank you so much. I am so glad > > that > > > > you > > > > heard what I said and not took offense. I did > > not > > > > think that you would but just in case I just > > > wanted > > > > to > > > > let you know that I would be open to any > > response > > > to > > > > whatever either you or Tamara had to say > because > > I > > > > know from you when you say stuff it is said > with > > > > love > > > > and that is how it should be received and I > do. > > > > > > > > I hope you have a great day honey! > > > > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > > > --- Francisco gemellodigiovanni@...> > > wrote: > > > > > > > > > Pam: > > > > > > > > > > I would never go off on you! As I said, I > > > > > appreciate your > > > > > perspective, and I always learn from your > > point > > > of > > > > > view. > > > > > > > > > > That's one more thing I've learned about > this > > > > > process: when someone > > > > > is sincere in their words (like I can tell > you > > > > are), > > > > > I need to listen > > > > > because we all have lessons to teach each > > other, > > > > > even when we think > > > > > we know all the answers. > > > > > > > > > > Francisco > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thanks for not going off on me Francisco > and > > I > > > > am > > > > > glad > > > > > > we had this communication. I understand > > > > > everything > > > > > > that you said and why you said it. I am > > happy > > > > for > > > > > > you. I wish you continued success. > Thanks > > > for > > > > > being > > > > > > open to my comments. > > > > > > > > > > > > Pam Marsh > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 12, 2005 Report Share Posted August 12, 2005 I'm impressed, Pam. You must have been very, very good to have been offered the oppurtunity to study at a fine arts school, and for free! (Shame on your Mom!) Pam b --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> wrote: > Well Robynn, as a child, I loved to dance. I don't > care if I was in K-Mart, Target, you could always > find > me somewhere twirling around to the music they would > be playing in the store. > > My mother would just say you are really working my > nervous why can't you ever just stand still (lol). > Anyway, I enjoyed seeing the ballerinas and I would > watch that show called Fame. When I got in 7th > grade > we would have PE (physical education) and three days > out of five would be free day (do whatever as long > as > it was something physical). Some of us would do > jazzercise, aerobics while others would run, play > basket ball, etc. I chose the jazzercise. At the > end > of class when the floor would clear, I would put on > a > song and I would make combinations (dance > routines)right there. I never knew that I was being > watched. Sometimes I would stay after school and go > into the gym and just dance. Once day the teacher > called me aside and said we have been watching you > and > we want to send you to the North Carolina School of > Fine Arts for dance (right there in Raliegh North > Carolina). It was a dream come true. She explained > I > would be taking my regular classes and that my > school > would pay for it. So my dream was crushed because my > mother said no. But oh well. Also, I love to sing. > > I can't really sing like Keys or anything but > I > can carry a tune. One of the other things I used to > do and I keep saying I would start back is writing > poetry. So there you have it. Three of my hidden > talents. I love art (paintings, sculptures). I > like > abstract art though. So if you guys know of any art > galleries local, by all means let me know. Thanks. > > Pam Marsh > > --- Robynn VanPatten robynnsf@...> wrote: > > > Baby Pam....what is your fine art talents? You > are > > just a treasure trove of lovely secrets!!! > > > > As for the acceptance of compliments...I was > always > > Ms. Self-deprecation. Couldn't ever accept a > > compliment, God forbid I should acknowledge any > gift > > or talent I had. And let's not even think about > > beauty and believing that some people find me > > attractive. > > > > But, always, echoing in my memory was this girl I > > went to high school with. Her name was Marisa, > and > > she was absolutely, enchantingly > > beautiful...physically, spiritually and > emotionally. > > Truly mesmerizing. We worked together, and were > > good friends. One day, I noticed that every time > > she was complimented (frequently, because of her > > vast beauty and charm), she looked at the person > > with sincere gratitude, and said, " Thank you!!! " > in > > a sweet and enthusiastic way. She accepted the > > compliment graciously...and by accepting it, it > > caused her to glow...instead of blush and stammer > > and grumble, the way compliments affected me. > This > > always stayed with me, and I decided to try and > > learn to be more like her in this way. A > compliment > > is a gift given to us by others, and we should > make > > the gift giver feel good for giving it. It is > just > > the gracious thing to do. > > > > My cousin, also a very beautiful and charming > girl, > > has mastered the art of self-love. She holds some > > insecurity, for sure. But, I would always marvel > > when she would describe an event to which she had > > gone, and she would say, " And, of course...I was > > dressed adorably! " or " And if I must say, I was > > devastatingly gorgeous that night! " She says it > > with humor...but those words (positive ones) go > into > > her subconscious, and give her positive self-talk. > > > And as a result, she has a serene confidence that > I > > admire. > > > > Accept the gift of admiration with grace. And > give > > it to yourself, as well. We all deserve to be > > loved. Especially by ourselves. There are many > in > > this world who would seek to tear us down, out of > > selfishness, jealousy, pain, or just plain old > > meanness. Let's not add fuel to that fire. > > > > Remember Saturday Night Live, and Al el? > His, > > " Stuart, you are kind, charming, and a good > person, > > and darn it! People like you. " He'd look in a > > mirror while he said it. Well, it may have been a > > spoof on self-affirmation...but darn it! I think > > it's a good thing to do. > > > > My two cents. > > Robynn > > > > Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > wrote: > > Pam, you are a caring person to. You can see this > > from your responses here. Don't ever throw that > > away, > > rather embrace it. Thank you so much for your > > compliments and if I don't always say thank you > its > > because I am still transitioning on this journey > and > > one of the biggest things that Robynn has been > > working > > with me on is learning to accept compliments. It > is > > so hard for me to just say thank you. I suppose > > when > > nice things are said, I filter it and try to > > convince > > myself that what has been said to me is the truth. > > > I > > am learning that its okay to receive compliments > and > > believe that its the truth. Its hard when you > have > > grown up with negativity. Its hard when your > parent > > has done nothing but convinced you all your life > > that > > you will never be anything or anyone. That you > will > > amount to nothing. Its really hard when you are > > constantly being called stupid, ignorant and you > are > > never encouraged. Its hard when you have certain > > talents and gifts and when an organization see > them > > and tell your parent that they are going to pay > for > > you to go to a major school of arts so that you > can > > master your talent/skill and she says no (even > when > > she does not have to pay for any of it and all you > > have to do is report to the school). This is what > I > > have endured as a child and unless you get help > for > > when it begins, it can take almost a lifetime to > > break > > free from that sort of thinking. So, I take it > one > > comment at a time. > > > > I am blessed and I know that will lots of prayer > and > > support, I will get there. > > > > Pam Marsh > > --- Pamela florenceboss@...> wrote: > > > > > Actually, Pam, I think that you are the kind, > > > generous > > > and loving person. I am constantly impressed by > > your > > > compassion and humility. I hope that when I get > to > > > experience life as a " normal weighted " person, I > > > turn > > > out to be just like you! > > > > > > Pam b > > > > > > --- Pamela A Marsh sweetnlow20012001@...> > > > wrote: > > > > === message truncated === ____________________________________________________ Start your day with Yahoo! - make it your home page http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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