Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Robyn, I am so happy for you that things are going well for you now in your relationship. I don't think that there is a worse feeling that uncertainty. It sounds like you have found yourself a good man. Ramona Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 I hear ya about the skin and pale thing! It's a drag but so was being 300 pounds. Kind of helps to keep a perspective on things. Also, PMS is no fun thing after WLS so try and be gentle to yourself. Why are you seeing Olivier again? Are you trying to maintain a friendship with him? Does the new beau () know that Olivier is coming? If I'm being nosey...just tell me to butt out! Setting ourselves up for " in __ months, I'll be in the 170's, etc. " is setting ourselves up for failure (partly). Our bodies have been through a major ordeal and we all lose weight on our own bodies schedules. I'm saying this as much to myself as I'm saying it to you. Unfortunately, saggy skin seems to be very much a part of a WLS patients future. Even those with amazing skin tone, seem to get a little saggy -- they just luck out and don't get sharpei skin (like myself). loves you for who you are (mind, body, and soul). My bet is he won't think your skin is the least big saggy. Hope the PMS goes away soon. BIG Hugs! Tina > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > are close to > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > overindulging and you > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > easy on the > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > body hasn't gone > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > need to eat 3400 > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Thanks, Tina. I hate saggy skin. HATE IT. HATE IT. It's not sharpei quality, yet..but I worry, because I ave another 50 lbs. to go OK, 45. Yes, knows Olivier will be here. And yes, it is because I want to still be his friend, and I thought that would be possible...and maybe it will be. I was just really really deeply in love with him for 4.5 years, and the only reason I stopped is because I realized/decided that he would never love me as much. So, I felt all empowered because of , my feelings for him/his for me. Like I could see everything so clearly, Olivier's deficiencies, etc.. And I was empowered by my own decisions...this surgery, for one. But now, is definitely starting to flake a bit. Like...not talking to me as much on the phone, not writing as often. We still have daily contact, but it's less urgent for him. You know? He used to give up sleep to talk to me. Now, it's like...well, it's different. So, I have to do the stupid playing hard to get crap now. I hate that. Why can't I just be in a relationship where I don't have to play freakin' games. Oh yean. I was in one. My marriage. Ha. robynn tina wrote: I hear ya about the skin and pale thing! It's a drag but so was being 300 pounds. Kind of helps to keep a perspective on things. Also, PMS is no fun thing after WLS so try and be gentle to yourself.Why are you seeing Olivier again? Are you trying to maintain a friendship with him? Does the new beau () know that Olivier is coming? If I'm being nosey...just tell me to butt out! Setting ourselves up for "in __ months, I'll be in the 170's, etc." is setting ourselves up for failure (partly). Our bodies have been through a major ordeal and we all lose weight on our own bodies schedules. I'm saying this as much to myself as I'm saying it to you.Unfortunately, saggy skin seems to be very much a part of a WLS patients future. Even those with amazing skin tone, seem to get a little saggy -- they just luck out and don't get sharpei skin (like myself). loves you for who you are (mind, body, and soul). My bet is he won't think your skin is the least big saggy.Hope the PMS goes away soon.BIG Hugs!Tina> > > > HI Robyn,> > > > It is more than likely water retention because you> > > are close to > > > you period. Since you say you have not been> > > overindulging and you > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it> > > easy on the > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your> > > body hasn't gone > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you> > > need to eat 3400 > > > calories so more than likely it is just water.> > > > Ramona> > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Robynn Wrote: So, I have to do the stupid playing hard to get crap now. I hate that. Why can't I just be in a relationship where I don't have to play freakin' games. Robynn honey you don't have to play any games. If is pulling back you have absolutely no control over that, and if playing hard to get brings on more attention from him what does that say of him? He likes hard to get girls? You deserve Greatness! We all do. You should never ever have to play any games to find love. If things are meant to be with nothing you do can screw it up, if you're not meant to be with him nothing you do will make it work. I know aunt flow is here but once she's gone you will be thinking much more clearly. He is a idea that someone shared with me. It worked. It's a way to figure out your Ideal man. Try this: Get a piece of paper, fold it in threes. Make three columns Column 1 : List everything you want in a mate. Tall, blue eyes, retirement plan , honest. Integrity .funny blah blah blah ,just everything you want, don't hold back Column2 : Things you're willing to compromise on : Like,, ok he might not have to have blue eyes or maybe he does not have to be 6'3 Blah blah blah Column 3 List the things you are NOT willing to compromise on Honesty , loving you 100% unconditionally ,integrity Blah blah blah Then look at your list and pray for god to send you your ideal man. Make a deal with your self that you not only can meet him you deserve to meet him. Believe truly he is out there, God is working on getting you both ready for each other right at this very moment! Also make sure you are all those things you're looking for. I know for me I had a lot of work to do on myself before I could be all the things for someone that I wanted them to be for me. Now When I did this God just had to send one or Two guys who did not fit my Ideal man just to make sure I was telling the truth,,lol being willing to pass them by knowing they were not the right ones for me they would of just been the right now for me guys lol. Well I can say it worked for me. is more then my idea man. Now this is true. One night I had forgotten all about my list and it was like maybe a year after and I were dating and I found it. I just sat on my bed reading my list and was shocked that God had indeed answered my prayers. It still gives me goose bumps! Robynn you're so so amazing, so beautiful, you deserve all God wants to give you Geez ,Sorry did not mean to go on and on lol Love Shell (Who's climbing off her soap box!) > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > are close to > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > overindulging and you > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > easy on the > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Men are interesting creatures! (no offense to the men of our group meant) They try so hard to get us and then when they figure they have us, a lot of them give up (or return to their normal selves). My husband was a big romancer when we were dating. We had a long distance relationship for a couple of years before he actually proposed. The proposal was sparked by the fact that I was seeing another guy and he didn't like it. He wanted me all for himself. My hubby's a good guy but they definitely pull out all the stops when they are pursuing and then let it slide once they have you. Have you talked to about his lack of attentiveness? Maybe something is up. Maybe he's worried about Olivier visiting? He knows how much you loved this guy, right? Games are ridiculous and in the long run, they aren't any good for anyone involved. I hope you guys iron out what needs to be ironed out and that things return to normal. As for saggy skin, I'll beat you in that department any day. I still have 70+ pounds to lose and I already look like a sharpei in the thigh area. Scary!! Chin up! Feel better soon! Tina p.s. -- I also thought I was anemic because I was so darn tired. Nope, not anemic at all. Just my body still recovering and dealing with losing 60 pounds in 3 months. Just rest as much as possible. > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > are close to > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > overindulging and you > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > easy on the > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Well said Shell! Much more eloquent than mine and exactly what I was trying to get across. Tina > > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > > are close to > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > > easy on the > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Well, thank you, all of you. Guess who just called, all apologetic because he was concerned I'd be worried about the late hour? We had a long conversation about everything, and he told me that he was really afraid about Olivier coming, and that maybe he had been pulling back a little bit because he doesn't want to be hurt. We talked it through, and he promised to try to be honest when he needs a bit of reassurance. He told me he's never been so much in love with anybody, and sometimes he really worries that he's going to go crashing down if it doesn't all work out. He doesn't know what to expect, because he's never been so vulnerable before. Usually, he's the one in control. I know the feeling (except for Olivier). The funny thing is that I feel the same way about . Completely gaga and vulnerable and safe (most of the time). But then, along comes my period, and I'm nuts. I apologized for being illogical, and told him I was on my period. The French expression for that? "Oh, the English have embarqued?" (Olivier would say, "Oh, you are having your flower?" Olivier is the only boy in an all girl family, and is one of four brothers. So there you have it.) Anyway, he said I shouldn't apologize, that he knew that hormones can cause people to be ill-tempered for a bit...and that he was 43 years old, he knew I was a woman, was glad I was a woman, wouldn't be attracted to me if I WEREN'T a woman...and that having a period is part of what makes me a woman. And that he loves me. So, we're fine. Crisis averted. Hormones calming down. Hey, what do you know? The French battled the English and won!! Hee hee RobynnTina wrote: Well said Shell! Much more eloquent than mine and exactly what I was trying to get across.Tina> > > > > > HI Robyn,> > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you> > > > > are close to > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been> > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it> > > > > easy on the > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your> > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you> > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water.> > > > > > Ramona> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 You hit it right on the money about being worried about Olivier, Tina. I actually told him (before he confessed about his insecurity) that I was thinking I had been too available to him and too open...and that maybe he was losing interest in me. That I knew men like to be the predator. He said, "I'm not a predator, Robynn. I am a lover. And you will always be a mystery to me, no matter how honest and open you are. You are a woman. You are American. You are incredibly bright and complicated. So, you don't have to add more intrigue to the mix by pulling away, or playing games. I'm not like that. I want to be close and connected to you. I guess I've been pulling away, but it's not because I'm playing a game or losing interest. I just am really worried about getting too close to you right now, because I'm afraid you are going to choose Olivier over me. I have been thinking I need to protect my heart, because I don't want to be devastated. THAT'S the issue. I love you too much. That's the problem." So...again with the perfect words. He is just a wonderful guy, that's all there is to it. We talked it all out...and everything is perfect again.... Sigh. RobynnTina wrote: Men are interesting creatures! (no offense to the men of our group meant) They try so hard to get us and then when they figure they have us, a lot of them give up (or return to their normal selves). My husband was a big romancer when we were dating. We had a long distance relationship for a couple of years before he actually proposed. The proposal was sparked by the fact that I was seeing another guy and he didn't like it. He wanted me all for himself. My hubby's a good guy but they definitely pull out all the stops when they are pursuing and then let it slide once they have you.Have you talked to about his lack of attentiveness? Maybe something is up. Maybe he's worried about Olivier visiting? He knows how much you loved this guy, right? Games are ridiculous and in the long run, they aren't any good for anyone involved. I hope you guys iron out what needs to be ironed out and that things return to normal.As for saggy skin, I'll beat you in that department any day. I still have 70+ pounds to lose and I already look like a sharpei in the thigh area. Scary!!Chin up! Feel better soon!Tinap.s. -- I also thought I was anemic because I was so darn tired. Nope, not anemic at all. Just my body still recovering and dealing with losing 60 pounds in 3 months. Just rest as much as possible.> > > > > HI Robyn,> > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you> > > > are close to > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been> > > > overindulging and you > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it> > > > easy on the > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your> > > > body hasn't gone > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you> > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water.> > > > > Ramona> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Very well said Shell Robynn you are wonderful, in and out....never settle for less than your ideal guy. If its not , and it might still be, then some one better is waiting for you. You are worthy!! Love and Huggles > > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > > are close to > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > > easy on the > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Thanks, . Yep. you are right, I am worthy. Thanks for reminding me!! Robynn Diane Duenas wrote: Very well said ShellRobynn you are wonderful, in and out....never settle for less than your ideal guy. If its not , and it might still be, then some one better is waiting for you. You are worthy!!Love and Huggles> > > > > > HI Robyn,> > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you> > > > > are close to > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been> > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it> > > > > easy on the > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your> > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you> > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water.> > > > > > Ramona> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Im so glad to hear that Robynn!!! He sounds really really fantabulous!! > > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > > are close to > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > > easy on the > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 Thanks, Ramona. I sure hope so...it seems as if I have.... Robynnsweetgemlady656@... wrote: Robyn, I am so happy for you that things are going well for you now in your relationship. I don't think that there is a worse feeling that uncertainty. It sounds like you have found yourself a good man. Ramona Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 2005 Report Share Posted August 23, 2005 I'm so happy for you Robynn! I'm glad he fessed up that he was worried about Olivier. I kind of thought maybe it had to do with him. I'm sure you'll sleep/feel muchbetter now that you guys are back to normal. Tina > > > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > > > are close to > > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > > > easy on the > > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2005 Report Share Posted August 24, 2005 Re: Re: Robynn Well, thank you, all of you. Guess who just called, all apologetic because he was concerned I'd be worried about the late hour? We had a long conversation about everything, and he told me that he was really afraid about Olivier coming, and that maybe he had been pulling back a little bit because he doesn't want to be hurt. We talked it through, and he promised to try to be honest when he needs a bit of reassurance. He told me he's never been so much in love with anybody, and sometimes he really worries that he's going to go crashing down if it doesn't all work out. He doesn't know what to expect, because he's never been so vulnerable before. Usually, he's the one in control. I know the feeling (except for Olivier). The funny thing is that I feel the same way about . Completely gaga and vulnerable and safe (most of the time). But then, along comes my period, and I'm nuts. I apologized for being illogical, and told him I was on my period. The French expression for that? "Oh, the English have embarqued?" (Olivier would say, "Oh, you are having your flower?" Olivier is the only boy in an all girl family, and is one of four brothers. So there you have it.) Anyway, he said I shouldn't apologize, that he knew that hormones can cause people to be ill-tempered for a bit...and that he was 43 years old, he knew I was a woman, was glad I was a woman, wouldn't be attracted to me if I WEREN'T a woman...and that having a period is part of what makes me a woman. And that he loves me. So, we're fine. Crisis averted. Hormones calming down. Hey, what do you know? The French battled the English and won!! Hee hee RobynnTina wrote: Well said Shell! Much more eloquent than mine and exactly what I was trying to get across.Tina> > > > > > HI Robyn,> > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you> > > > > are close to > > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been> > > > > overindulging and you > > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it> > > > > easy on the > > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your> > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you> > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water.> > > > > > Ramona> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2005 Report Share Posted August 24, 2005 OK, here's another possibility, not one that we women appreciate, but none-the-less common in men... could just simply be getting over the honeymoon phase of your relationship? It's not that he loves you any less, but when the relationship is a couple months out, men (or so it seems) do not appear to be as " urgent " about the communication, (or anything else, for that matter). Or maybe it's because they, (men) know they already have ya', and don't need to try as hard... Oh, I don't know! I'm just thinkin' out loud... hang in there Robynn!! Pam b --- Robynn VanPatten robynnsf@...> wrote: > Thanks, Tina. I hate saggy skin. HATE IT. HATE > IT. It's not sharpei quality, yet..but I worry, > because I ave another 50 lbs. to go OK, 45. > > Yes, knows Olivier will be here. And yes, it > is because I want to still be his friend, and I > thought that would be possible...and maybe it will > be. I was just really really deeply in love with > him for 4.5 years, and the only reason I stopped is > because I realized/decided that he would never love > me as much. > > So, I felt all empowered because of , my > feelings for him/his for me. Like I could see > everything so clearly, Olivier's deficiencies, etc.. > And I was empowered by my own decisions...this > surgery, for one. > > But now, is definitely starting to flake a bit. > Like...not talking to me as much on the phone, not > writing as often. We still have daily contact, but > it's less urgent for him. You know? He used to > give up sleep to talk to me. Now, it's like...well, > it's different. > > So, I have to do the stupid playing hard to get crap > now. I hate that. Why can't I just be in a > relationship where I don't have to play freakin' > games. Oh yean. I was in one. My marriage. > > Ha. > robynn > tina ma2two@...> wrote: > I hear ya about the skin and pale thing! It's a drag > but so was > being 300 pounds. Kind of helps to keep a > perspective on things. > Also, PMS is no fun thing after WLS so try and be > gentle to yourself. > > Why are you seeing Olivier again? Are you trying to > maintain a > friendship with him? Does the new beau () know > that Olivier is > coming? If I'm being nosey...just tell me to butt > out! > > Setting ourselves up for " in __ months, I'll be in > the 170's, etc. " > is setting ourselves up for failure (partly). Our > bodies have been > through a major ordeal and we all lose weight on our > own bodies > schedules. I'm saying this as much to myself as I'm > saying it to you. > > Unfortunately, saggy skin seems to be very much a > part of a WLS > patients future. Even those with amazing skin tone, > seem to get a > little saggy -- they just luck out and don't get > sharpei skin (like > myself). > > loves you for who you are (mind, body, and > soul). My bet is he > won't think your skin is the least big saggy. > > Hope the PMS goes away soon. > > BIG Hugs! > Tina > > > > > > > I actually did start my period yesterday, so > > > > that's probably it. > > > > It's just frustrating. I'm trying to up my > water > > > > intake. It's > > > > amazing what hormones will do to your psyche. > It's > > > > like everytime I > === message truncated === ____________________________________________________ Start your day with Yahoo! - make it your home page http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2005 Report Share Posted August 24, 2005 Ooh, I love this post!!! I'm going to print it out and read every night! (OK, maybe that is an exaggeration! I'll read it every other night! lol) Pam b --- Shell shells793@...> wrote: > > Robynn Wrote: > So, I have to do the stupid playing hard to get crap > now. I hate > that. Why can't I just be in a relationship where I > don't have to > play freakin' games. > > Robynn honey you don't have to play any games. If > is pulling > back you have absolutely no control over that, and > if playing hard > to get brings on more attention from him what does > that say of him? > He likes hard to get girls? > > You deserve Greatness! We all do. You should never > ever have to play > any games to find love. If things are meant to be > with nothing > you do can screw it up, if you're not meant to be > with him nothing > you do will make it work. > > I know aunt flow is here but once she's gone you > will be thinking > much more clearly. > > He is a idea that someone shared with me. It worked. > It's a way to > figure out your Ideal man. > > Try this: Get a piece of paper, fold it in threes. > Make three > columns > > Column 1 : List everything you want in a mate. > > Tall, blue eyes, retirement plan , honest. > Integrity .funny blah > blah blah ,just everything you want, don't hold back > > Column2 : Things you're willing to compromise on : > > Like,, ok he might not have to have blue eyes or > maybe he does not > have to be 6'3 > Blah blah blah > > Column 3 List the things you are NOT willing to > compromise on > > Honesty , loving you 100% unconditionally ,integrity > > Blah blah blah > > Then look at your list and pray for god to send you > your ideal man. > Make a deal with your self that you not only can > meet him you > deserve to meet him. Believe truly he is out > there, God is working > on getting you both ready for each other right at > this very moment! > > Also make sure you are all those things you're > looking for. > I know for me I had a lot of work to do on myself > before I could be > all the things for someone that I wanted them to be > for me. > > Now When I did this God just had to send one or Two > guys who did > not fit my Ideal man just to make sure I was telling > the truth,,lol > being willing to pass them by knowing they were not > the right ones > for me they would of just been the right now for me > guys lol. > > Well I can say it worked for me. is more > then my idea man. > Now this is true. One night I had forgotten all > about my list and it > was like maybe a year after and I were > dating and I found > it. I just sat on my bed reading my list and was > shocked that God > had indeed answered my prayers. It still gives me > goose bumps! > > Robynn you're so so amazing, so beautiful, you > deserve all God wants > to give you > > > Geez ,Sorry did not mean to go on and on lol > > Love Shell > (Who's climbing off her soap box!) > > > > > > > I hear ya about the skin and pale thing! It's a > drag but so was > > being 300 pounds. Kind of helps to keep a > perspective on things. > > Also, PMS is no fun thing after WLS so try and be > gentle to > yourself. > > > > Why are you seeing Olivier again? Are you trying > to maintain a > > friendship with him? Does the new beau () know > that Olivier is > > coming? If I'm being nosey...just tell me to butt > out! > > > > Setting ourselves up for " in __ months, I'll be in > the 170's, > etc. " > > is setting ourselves up for failure (partly). Our > bodies have been > > through a major ordeal and we all lose weight on > our own bodies > > schedules. I'm saying this as much to myself as > I'm saying it to > you. > > > > Unfortunately, saggy skin seems to be very much a > part of a WLS > > patients future. Even those with amazing skin > tone, seem to get a > > little saggy -- they just luck out and don't get > sharpei skin > (like > > myself). > > > > loves you for who you are (mind, body, and > soul). My bet is > he > > won't think your skin is the least big saggy. > > > > Hope the PMS goes away soon. > > > > BIG Hugs! > > Tina > > > > --- In > gastric-bypass-support-kaiser-patients , > > === message truncated === ____________________________________________________ Start your day with Yahoo! - make it your home page http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2005 Report Share Posted August 24, 2005 Glad to hear that everything is beginning to calm down!! Pam b --- Robynn VanPatten robynnsf@...> wrote: > Well, thank you, all of you. Guess who just called, > all apologetic because he was concerned I'd be > worried about the late hour? We had a long > conversation about everything, and he told me that > he was really afraid about Olivier coming, and that > maybe he had been pulling back a little bit because > he doesn't want to be hurt. We talked it through, > and he promised to try to be honest when he needs a > bit of reassurance. He told me he's never been so > much in love with anybody, and sometimes he really > worries that he's going to go crashing down if it > doesn't all work out. He doesn't know what to > expect, because he's never been so vulnerable > before. Usually, he's the one in control. > > I know the feeling (except for Olivier). > > The funny thing is that I feel the same way about > . Completely gaga and vulnerable and safe (most > of the time). But then, along comes my period, and > I'm nuts. > > I apologized for being illogical, and told him I was > on my period. The French expression for that? " Oh, > the English have embarqued? " (Olivier would say, > " Oh, you are having your flower? " Olivier is the > only boy in an all girl family, and is one of > four brothers. So there you have it.) > > Anyway, he said I shouldn't apologize, that he knew > that hormones can cause people to be ill-tempered > for a bit...and that he was 43 years old, he knew I > was a woman, was glad I was a woman, wouldn't be > attracted to me if I WEREN'T a woman...and that > having a period is part of what makes me a woman. > > And that he loves me. > > So, we're fine. Crisis averted. Hormones calming > down. Hey, what do you know? The French battled > the English and won!! > > Hee hee > Robynn > > Tina ma2two@...> wrote: > Well said Shell! Much more eloquent than mine and > exactly what I was > trying to get across. > > Tina > > > > > Thanks, Tina. I hate saggy skin. HATE IT. > HATE IT. It's not > > sharpei quality, yet..but I worry, because I ave > another 50 lbs. > to > > go OK, 45. > > > > > > Yes, knows Olivier will be here. And yes, > it is because I > > want to still be his friend, and I thought that > would be > > possible...and maybe it will be. I was just > really really deeply > in > > love with him for 4.5 years, and the only reason I > stopped is > > because I realized/decided that he would never > love me as much. > > > > > > So, I felt all empowered because of , my > feelings for > him/his > > for me. Like I could see everything so clearly, > Olivier's > > deficiencies, etc.. And I was empowered by my own > decisions...this > === message truncated === ____________________________________________________ Start your day with Yahoo! - make it your home page http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2005 Report Share Posted August 24, 2005 I hope the honeymoon isn't over YET!!! Actually, said once that we'll get to have four honeymoon periods. The first one is now, the beginning, the falling in love. The second one will start when we actually get to finally be physical (when he is here in October)..and then the third will be when he moves in...and the fourth will be after we get married. The actual honeymoon.... RobynnPamela wrote: OK, here's another possibility, not one that we womenappreciate, but none-the-less common in men... could just simply be getting over the honeymoon phaseof your relationship? It's not that he loves you anyless, but when the relationship is a couple monthsout, men (or so it seems) do not appear to be as"urgent" about the communication, (or anything else,for that matter). Or maybe it's because they, (men) know they alreadyhave ya', and don't need to try as hard... Oh, I don'tknow! I'm just thinkin' out loud... hang in thereRobynn!!Pam b--- Robynn VanPatten wrote:> Thanks, Tina. I hate saggy skin. HATE IT. HATE> IT. It's not sharpei quality, yet..but I worry,> because I ave another 50 lbs. to go OK, 45.> > Yes, knows Olivier will be here. And yes, it> is because I want to still be his friend, and I> thought that would be possible...and maybe it will> be. I was just really really deeply in love with> him for 4.5 years, and the only reason I stopped is> because I realized/decided that he would never love> me as much.> > So, I felt all empowered because of , my> feelings for him/his for me. Like I could see> everything so clearly, Olivier's deficiencies, etc..> And I was empowered by my own decisions...this> surgery, for one. > > But now, is definitely starting to flake a bit.> Like...not talking to me as much on the phone, not> writing as often. We still have daily contact, but> it's less urgent for him. You know? He used to> give up sleep to talk to me. Now, it's like...well,> it's different.> > So, I have to do the stupid playing hard to get crap> now. I hate that. Why can't I just be in a> relationship where I don't have to play freakin'> games. Oh yean. I was in one. My marriage.> > Ha.> robynn> tina wrote:> I hear ya about the skin and pale thing! It's a drag> but so was > being 300 pounds. Kind of helps to keep a> perspective on things. > Also, PMS is no fun thing after WLS so try and be> gentle to yourself.> > Why are you seeing Olivier again? Are you trying to> maintain a > friendship with him? Does the new beau () know> that Olivier is > coming? If I'm being nosey...just tell me to butt> out! > > Setting ourselves up for "in __ months, I'll be in> the 170's, etc." > is setting ourselves up for failure (partly). Our> bodies have been > through a major ordeal and we all lose weight on our> own bodies > schedules. I'm saying this as much to myself as I'm> saying it to you.> > Unfortunately, saggy skin seems to be very much a> part of a WLS > patients future. Even those with amazing skin tone,> seem to get a > little saggy -- they just luck out and don't get> sharpei skin (like > myself).> > loves you for who you are (mind, body, and> soul). My bet is he > won't think your skin is the least big saggy.> > Hope the PMS goes away soon.> > BIG Hugs!> Tina> > > > > > > I actually did start my period yesterday, so> > > > that's probably it. > > > > It's just frustrating. I'm trying to up my> water> > > > intake. It's > > > > amazing what hormones will do to your psyche. > It's> > > > like everytime I > === message truncated === ____________________________________________________Start your day with Yahoo! - make it your home page http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2005 Report Share Posted August 24, 2005 Dear Robynn, I hear you about the games and feelings of lack of attention from the opposite sex. That is why I am happily single (2 years now) I have had 3 6-7 year relationships and I am always the one to break it off. I just get tired of the maintenance. Here is a funny thought that ran through my brain when is was at my appt with Dr Hahn. He kept telling me to find an alternate form of birth control. I told him that wouldn't be a problem, since I was single. He kept pushing the issue like an arguement and I thought, this is why I am happy without men, so I pacified him and said I would. Made me laugh about it after Jeanne > > > > > HI Robyn, > > > > > It is more than likely water retention because you > > > > are close to > > > > you period. Since you say you have not been > > > > overindulging and you > > > > are drinking enough water. You might want to take it > > > > easy on the > > > > sodium. Have you been eating enough so that your > > > > body hasn't gone > > > > into starvation mode? To really gain a pound you > > > > need to eat 3400 > > > > calories so more than likely it is just water. > > > > > Ramona > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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