Re: very depressed......

[Guest guest]

OK, Sweets...I understand why you are discouraged, I do. But let's keep some perspective here. How long have you been overweight, struggling with your weight? And how many months are we really talking, three, before you can have the surgery?

The thing about the depression is that it isn't just the hormones. It's also that you can no longer use food to self-medicate when you are feeling down and blue. Everyone can use a little therapy. You've been taking care of Randy non-stop for some time...and that akes it a bit hard to focus on yourself, you know? Is it possible that you are a bit depressed? Low grade depression, the kind you live with for many years...well, it can become a way of life. I'm not saying the shrink is correct...but let's say she is, for arguments' sake...wouldn't you prefer to deal with it a bit before you undertake this whole thing?

As far as Randy being way ahead of you...in a way, that will help keep him on track. You'll be back in the beginning stages, and it will encourage him not to venture too far afield in his eating habits.

Also, he'll have more energy to help you. I mean, I'm 12 weeks out, and I'm still exhausted. He'll be that much more able to be there for you.

The bottom line is that you'll both get there. And yes, as a guy, he'll probably lose faster...but you never know. And even if he gets to goal first...he'll have to be doing exercise, etc..to maintain, and to help you along. That will be good for both of you, as it will cement him into a work out program post goal...and hopefully, he'll keep it up for life...with you by his side.

You'll both be there soon enough...in the meantime, work on your weight. Watch your portions, drink your water, exercise. The more you lose now, the less you'll need to lose later!

I know it's disappointing, but use this time wisely to figure out why you overeat...what the emotional reasons might be...and think about what you will do instead of eating to deal with what is eating you.

Good luck! And I am sorry...but patience, my dear. It will happen!!

RobynnRandy Mendez wrote:

Hi Friends,

I need a friend right now. Randy is doing super! He has lost thirty pounds since surgery on August 2!!!! Woooo Hooooo! He tried his first food over the weekend, everything went great. We even went to the fair and he had a bit of Souix Burger, nothing bugs him, he isn't craving anything, he is full after a bite or two, He is great!

I, on the other hand , am so bummed out. Here is the goofy story. First of all, when it was Randy's turn for a shrink, he went to the Kaiser lady, signed, sealed, delivered...all done. I went with him, great. My turn came and the rules changed the week of my appt.it changed to a six month program, my PC doc signed me off, I'm not bananas, passed "GO" and went to my appt at UCLA. I got a "go directly to shrink card" so I called the lady they use, made the appt...or rather, she called, chatted with Randy and gave him my appt time to give to me, and complained that I should have seen her BEFORE I went to UCLA, that this is all wrong....oh well, it works. Now try to follow me here..... The day before THAT appt, she called to reschedule it, I told her I had already taken the day off, she agreed to keep the day, but change the time, instead of 11 am it was now 9 am. I left the house at 5:30 to get there, the 405 during rush hour in westwood, UGLY!!!! I got to her building at about 8,

found a 20 minute parking, had a cup of coffee and drove to the parking structure at 8:30, reasonable . For the sake of reader enjoyment, I will add that nobody was there yet, there was nowhere to sit, so right next to the docs door there was a fire escape. It's Brentwood, the fire escape was air conditioned, carpeted, I decided to sit there for a few minutes til she showed up. When I went to leave...the door was locked, I trucked down two flights of stairs, around the parking structure to the elevator, and still got there before the doc. When she showed up, she gave me instructions.... sit in the waiting room, and fill out 18 (that's right EIGHTEEN) pages of questions! Including drawing a picture of myself now and after surgery! She said it should take an hour, if I finish in less than an hour review the form and elaborate more.

THE APPOINTMENT.... she asked about my parents support for this...???!!!!! I figured "OK"? maybe she isn't on that page yet...they both passed away when I was a teen, over thirty years ago. After two hours, she told me, no lie, she was going to analize me in a few minutes time, I was getting more from her than I could get in years of therapy!!!! I was overweight from depression from whemn Randy was sick 18 years ago, because my parents died I was afraid of losing him too. Blah, Blah, Blah.... I went to years of therapy when all that happened.... Anyway, she said she would let UCLA know in a couple weeks, I asked if everything looked good...she repeated this two week time. I left the building. The parking attendant almost had a cow, she sent me to get validated for parking, it was a rate of 2.25 every 15 minutes and was close to 30 dollars. She would not take my money until I parked and tried to get my stub validated..... I saw the doc in the elevator, asked if she

validated....no. Then she asked why, when I told her....NO JOKE...... she told me to go down to the ground floor, buy a cookie and the bagel shop would validate me!!!!! Now, as I am biting my tongue, I'm in the elevator with her.....wanting so very much to say...."aren't you the eating disorder lady who just told me to buy a cookie?" .....but in the intrest of wanting a clean bill of mental health, I shut up. I bought a diet coke, and laughed all the way home!!!!!!

UCLA didn't like my EKG I had to get hospital records because the cardiologist kicked my referral back to the PC. Cardiologists are so pompous!!!! Then UCLA called to say the damn kooky cookie doctor said I need therapy for my depression!!!! So, now I have to go see a doc for this phantom depression.... when I called the cookie doc, she friggen said she wrote a "glowing recomendation for surgery!!" I asked her to please call UCLA and help them read her writing because they told me she wrote I need therapy!!!! She said she recomends that for everyone! I need to see a therapist once or twice, go to a couple support meetings, you guys don't count, it's not in person.... and thats the end of it. She told me people get depressed after surgery, I need to know what to do when that happens....well no shit! Randy just had his surgery , I helped him when he crashed and burned about two weeks out, and through the rash, and I understand(thanks to this board) about fat storing

hormones and that the hormones go crazy when they lose their happy fot home. But, in the interest of jumping through hoops , I finally got an appointment in SEPTEMBER, to see a new shrink.... I wasn't allowed to say "weight loss surgery" or no appt, but now I am depressed!!!! My window of oppretunity has slipped by, now I have to call UCLA and tell them I have to wait until December for surgery, I start full time classes at the college, work starts back up next week, And now I am depressed. I thought Randy and I would support each other, now he will be so far ahead of me, I don't know if he will be as patient as I was for him....that's silly, I know he will, but he will be months out and I'll be whiny, clear liquidy, and I've worked so hard to do everything.....I wasn't depressed before but I sure am now.

[Guest guest]

Okay after reading that I just want to give you the biggest hug I

possible can. How freakin frustrating.... You will get there soon

enough but I know how lame that sounds. I almost pulled all my hair

out this month from waiting so you're not being crazy or selfish.

I've learned two things from all of this - the 1200 calerie intake

and patience! Still trying to manage it all!

I had to laugh at the cookie statement. What the hell!!!!! Hang in

there babe......We are all here for you and it may be to your benefit

for Randy to be 100% when your time comes. Being at two different

stages and the same time will work to both of your benefits. It will

help both of you to be more mindful of your pasts and futures.

Keeping on top of everything...good things will come your way because

you've been a total angel here and to Randy.

>mwah<

Azin

> Hi Friends,

> I need a friend right now. Randy is doing super! He has lost thirty

pounds since surgery on August 2!!!! Woooo Hooooo! He tried his first

food over the weekend, everything went great. We even went to the

fair and he had a bit of Souix Burger, nothing bugs him, he isn't

craving anything, he is full after a bite or two, He is great!

> I, on the other hand , am so bummed out. Here is the goofy story.

First of all, when it was Randy's turn for a shrink, he went to the

Kaiser lady, signed, sealed, delivered...all done. I went with him,

great. My turn came and the rules changed the week of my appt.it

changed to a six month program, my PC doc signed me off, I'm not

bananas, passed " GO " and went to my appt at UCLA. I got a " go

directly to shrink card " so I called the lady they use, made the

appt...or rather, she called, chatted with Randy and gave him my appt

time to give to me, and complained that I should have seen her BEFORE

I went to UCLA, that this is all wrong....oh well, it works. Now try

to follow me here..... The day before THAT appt, she called to

reschedule it, I told her I had already taken the day off, she agreed

to keep the day, but change the time, instead of 11 am it was now 9

am. I left the house at 5:30 to get there, the 405 during rush hour

in westwood, UGLY!!!! I got to her building at about 8, found

> a 20 minute parking, had a cup of coffee and drove to the parking

structure at 8:30, reasonable . For the sake of reader enjoyment, I

will add that nobody was there yet, there was nowhere to sit, so

right next to the docs door there was a fire escape. It's Brentwood,

the fire escape was air conditioned, carpeted, I decided to sit there

for a few minutes til she showed up. When I went to leave...the door

was locked, I trucked down two flights of stairs, around the parking

structure to the elevator, and still got there before the doc. When

she showed up, she gave me instructions.... sit in the waiting room,

and fill out 18 (that's right EIGHTEEN) pages of questions! Including

drawing a picture of myself now and after surgery! She said it should

take an hour, if I finish in less than an hour review the form and

elaborate more.

> THE APPOINTMENT.... she asked about my parents support for

this...???!!!!! I figured " OK " ? maybe she isn't on that page

yet...they both passed away when I was a teen, over thirty years ago.

After two hours, she told me, no lie, she was going to analize me in

a few minutes time, I was getting more from her than I could get in

years of therapy!!!! I was overweight from depression from whemn

Randy was sick 18 years ago, because my parents died I was afraid of

losing him too. Blah, Blah, Blah.... I went to years of therapy when

all that happened.... Anyway, she said she would let UCLA know in a

couple weeks, I asked if everything looked good...she repeated this

two week time. I left the building. The parking attendant almost had

a cow, she sent me to get validated for parking, it was a rate of

2.25 every 15 minutes and was close to 30 dollars. She would not take

my money until I parked and tried to get my stub validated..... I saw

the doc in the elevator, asked if she validated....no.

> Then she asked why, when I told her....NO JOKE...... she told me

to go down to the ground floor, buy a cookie and the bagel shop would

validate me!!!!! Now, as I am biting my tongue, I'm in the elevator

with her.....wanting so very much to say.... " aren't you the eating

disorder lady who just told me to buy a cookie? " .....but in the

intrest of wanting a clean bill of mental health, I shut up. I bought

a diet coke, and laughed all the way home!!!!!!

> UCLA didn't like my EKG I had to get hospital records because the

cardiologist kicked my referral back to the PC. Cardiologists are so

pompous!!!! Then UCLA called to say the damn kooky cookie doctor said

I need therapy for my depression!!!! So, now I have to go see a doc

for this phantom depression.... when I called the cookie doc, she

friggen said she wrote a " glowing recomendation for surgery!! " I

asked her to please call UCLA and help them read her writing because

they told me she wrote I need therapy!!!! She said she recomends that

for everyone! I need to see a therapist once or twice, go to a

couple support meetings, you guys don't count, it's not in person....

and thats the end of it. She told me people get depressed after

surgery, I need to know what to do when that happens....well no shit!

Randy just had his surgery , I helped him when he crashed and burned

about two weeks out, and through the rash, and I understand(thanks to

this board) about fat storing hormones and that

> the hormones go crazy when they lose their happy fot home. But, in

the interest of jumping through hoops , I finally got an appointment

in SEPTEMBER, to see a new shrink.... I wasn't allowed to say " weight

loss surgery " or no appt, but now I am depressed!!!! My window of

oppretunity has slipped by, now I have to call UCLA and tell them I

have to wait until December for surgery, I start full time classes at

the college, work starts back up next week, And now I am depressed. I

thought Randy and I would support each other, now he will be so far

ahead of me, I don't know if he will be as patient as I was for

him....that's silly, I know he will, but he will be months out and

I'll be whiny, clear liquidy, and I've worked so hard to do

everything.....I wasn't depressed before but I sure am now.

[Guest guest]

Sue I wish I had the words to help you. Hang in there. Is getting a

second opinion an option??

Vent vent vent....I might not have fancy words for you, but Im here

for you. I know its hard right now and nothing would really help

except knowing that you arent alone.

Big Big Huggles

> > Hi Friends,

> > I need a friend right now. Randy is doing super! He has lost

> thirty pounds since surgery on August 2!!!! Woooo Hooooo! He tried

> his first food over the weekend, everything went great. We even

went

> to the fair and he had a bit of Souix Burger, nothing bugs him, he

> isn't craving anything, he is full after a bite or two, He is

great!

> > I, on the other hand , am so bummed out. Here is the goofy

story.

> First of all, when it was Randy's turn for a shrink, he went to

the

> Kaiser lady, signed, sealed, delivered...all done. I went with

him,

> great. My turn came and the rules changed the week of my appt.it

> changed to a six month program, my PC doc signed me off, I'm not

> bananas, passed " GO " and went to my appt at UCLA. I got a " go

> directly to shrink card " so I called the lady they use, made the

> appt...or rather, she called, chatted with Randy and gave him my

> appt time to give to me, and complained that I should have seen

her

> BEFORE I went to UCLA, that this is all wrong....oh well, it

works.

> Now try to follow me here..... The day before THAT appt, she

called

> to reschedule it, I told her I had already taken the day off, she

> agreed to keep the day, but change the time, instead of 11 am it

was

> now 9 am. I left the house at 5:30 to get there, the 405 during

rush

> hour in westwood, UGLY!!!! I got to her building at about 8, found

> > a 20 minute parking, had a cup of coffee and drove to the

parking

> structure at 8:30, reasonable . For the sake of reader enjoyment,

I

> will add that nobody was there yet, there was nowhere to sit, so

> right next to the docs door there was a fire escape. It's

Brentwood,

> the fire escape was air conditioned, carpeted, I decided to sit

> there for a few minutes til she showed up. When I went to

> leave...the door was locked, I trucked down two flights of stairs,

> around the parking structure to the elevator, and still got there

> before the doc. When she showed up, she gave me instructions....

sit

> in the waiting room, and fill out 18 (that's right EIGHTEEN) pages

> of questions! Including drawing a picture of myself now and after

> surgery! She said it should take an hour, if I finish in less than

> an hour review the form and elaborate more.

> > THE APPOINTMENT.... she asked about my parents support for

> this...???!!!!! I figured " OK " ? maybe she isn't on that page

> yet...they both passed away when I was a teen, over thirty years

> ago. After two hours, she told me, no lie, she was going to

analize

> me in a few minutes time, I was getting more from her than I could

> get in years of therapy!!!! I was overweight from depression from

> whemn Randy was sick 18 years ago, because my parents died I was

> afraid of losing him too. Blah, Blah, Blah.... I went to years of

> therapy when all that happened.... Anyway, she said she would let

> UCLA know in a couple weeks, I asked if everything looked

good...she

> repeated this two week time. I left the building. The parking

> attendant almost had a cow, she sent me to get validated for

> parking, it was a rate of 2.25 every 15 minutes and was close to

30

> dollars. She would not take my money until I parked and tried to

get

> my stub validated..... I saw the doc in the elevator, asked if she

> validated....no.

> > Then she asked why, when I told her....NO JOKE...... she told

me

> to go down to the ground floor, buy a cookie and the bagel shop

> would validate me!!!!! Now, as I am biting my tongue, I'm in the

> elevator with her.....wanting so very much to say.... " aren't you

the

> eating disorder lady who just told me to buy a cookie? " .....but

in

> the intrest of wanting a clean bill of mental health, I shut up. I

> bought a diet coke, and laughed all the way home!!!!!!

> > UCLA didn't like my EKG I had to get hospital records because

the

> cardiologist kicked my referral back to the PC. Cardiologists are

so

> pompous!!!! Then UCLA called to say the damn kooky cookie doctor

> said I need therapy for my depression!!!! So, now I have to go see

a

> doc for this phantom depression.... when I called the cookie doc,

> she friggen said she wrote a " glowing recomendation for surgery!! "

I

> asked her to please call UCLA and help them read her writing

because

> they told me she wrote I need therapy!!!! She said she recomends

> that for everyone! I need to see a therapist once or twice, go to

a

> couple support meetings, you guys don't count, it's not in

> person.... and thats the end of it. She told me people get

> depressed after surgery, I need to know what to do when that

> happens....well no shit! Randy just had his surgery , I helped him

> when he crashed and burned about two weeks out, and through the

> rash, and I understand(thanks to this board) about fat storing

> hormones and that

> > the hormones go crazy when they lose their happy fot home. But,

> in the interest of jumping through hoops , I finally got an

> appointment in SEPTEMBER, to see a new shrink.... I wasn't allowed

> to say " weight loss surgery " or no appt, but now I am

depressed!!!!

> My window of oppretunity has slipped by, now I have to call UCLA

and

> tell them I have to wait until December for surgery, I start full

> time classes at the college, work starts back up next week, And

now

> I am depressed. I thought Randy and I would support each other,

now

> he will be so far ahead of me, I don't know if he will be as

patient

> as I was for him....that's silly, I know he will, but he will be

> months out and I'll be whiny, clear liquidy, and I've worked so

hard

> to do everything.....I wasn't depressed before but I sure am now.

[Guest guest]

wow

i forgot your first name is it Shirley ? What a bizarre chain of events...................I am sorry this has happened to you, sometimes with kaiser you never know if you need to just go with the flow and not cause waves, or big a tidal wave.................I am sorry your depressed i can see why you would be. I think and hope your husband will be there for you. He should be able to understand when your time comes , having just gone through it, and not everyone is the same in all of this....................Please dont give up, You seem very intellegent and for godsakes its good you didnt go buy the cookies

colleenRandy Mendez wrote:

Hi Friends,

I need a friend right now. Randy is doing super! He has lost thirty pounds since surgery on August 2!!!! Woooo Hooooo! He tried his first food over the weekend, everything went great. We even went to the fair and he had a bit of Souix Burger, nothing bugs him, he isn't craving anything, he is full after a bite or two, He is great!

I, on the other hand , am so bummed out. Here is the goofy story. First of all, when it was Randy's turn for a shrink, he went to the Kaiser lady, signed, sealed, delivered...all done. I went with him, great. My turn came and the rules changed the week of my appt.it changed to a six month program, my PC doc signed me off, I'm not bananas, passed "GO" and went to my appt at UCLA. I got a "go directly to shrink card" so I called the lady they use, made the appt...or rather, she called, chatted with Randy and gave him my appt time to give to me, and complained that I should have seen her BEFORE I went to UCLA, that this is all wrong....oh well, it works. Now try to follow me here..... The day before THAT appt, she called to reschedule it, I told her I had already taken the day off, she agreed to keep the day, but change the time, instead of 11 am it was now 9 am. I left the house at 5:30 to get there, the 405 during rush hour in westwood, UGLY!!!! I got to her building at about 8,

found a 20 minute parking, had a cup of coffee and drove to the parking structure at 8:30, reasonable . For the sake of reader enjoyment, I will add that nobody was there yet, there was nowhere to sit, so right next to the docs door there was a fire escape. It's Brentwood, the fire escape was air conditioned, carpeted, I decided to sit there for a few minutes til she showed up. When I went to leave...the door was locked, I trucked down two flights of stairs, around the parking structure to the elevator, and still got there before the doc. When she showed up, she gave me instructions.... sit in the waiting room, and fill out 18 (that's right EIGHTEEN) pages of questions! Including drawing a picture of myself now and after surgery! She said it should take an hour, if I finish in less than an hour review the form and elaborate more.

THE APPOINTMENT.... she asked about my parents support for this...???!!!!! I figured "OK"? maybe she isn't on that page yet...they both passed away when I was a teen, over thirty years ago. After two hours, she told me, no lie, she was going to analize me in a few minutes time, I was getting more from her than I could get in years of therapy!!!! I was overweight from depression from whemn Randy was sick 18 years ago, because my parents died I was afraid of losing him too. Blah, Blah, Blah.... I went to years of therapy when all that happened.... Anyway, she said she would let UCLA know in a couple weeks, I asked if everything looked good...she repeated this two week time. I left the building. The parking attendant almost had a cow, she sent me to get validated for parking, it was a rate of 2.25 every 15 minutes and was close to 30 dollars. She would not take my money until I parked and tried to get my stub validated..... I saw the doc in the elevator, asked if she

validated....no. Then she asked why, when I told her....NO JOKE...... she told me to go down to the ground floor, buy a cookie and the bagel shop would validate me!!!!! Now, as I am biting my tongue, I'm in the elevator with her.....wanting so very much to say...."aren't you the eating disorder lady who just told me to buy a cookie?" .....but in the intrest of wanting a clean bill of mental health, I shut up. I bought a diet coke, and laughed all the way home!!!!!!

UCLA didn't like my EKG I had to get hospital records because the cardiologist kicked my referral back to the PC. Cardiologists are so pompous!!!! Then UCLA called to say the damn kooky cookie doctor said I need therapy for my depression!!!! So, now I have to go see a doc for this phantom depression.... when I called the cookie doc, she friggen said she wrote a "glowing recomendation for surgery!!" I asked her to please call UCLA and help them read her writing because they told me she wrote I need therapy!!!! She said she recomends that for everyone! I need to see a therapist once or twice, go to a couple support meetings, you guys don't count, it's not in person.... and thats the end of it. She told me people get depressed after surgery, I need to know what to do when that happens....well no shit! Randy just had his surgery , I helped him when he crashed and burned about two weeks out, and through the rash, and I understand(thanks to this board) about fat storing

hormones and that the hormones go crazy when they lose their happy fot home. But, in the interest of jumping through hoops , I finally got an appointment in SEPTEMBER, to see a new shrink.... I wasn't allowed to say "weight loss surgery" or no appt, but now I am depressed!!!! My window of oppretunity has slipped by, now I have to call UCLA and tell them I have to wait until December for surgery, I start full time classes at the college, work starts back up next week, And now I am depressed. I thought Randy and I would support each other, now he will be so far ahead of me, I don't know if he will be as patient as I was for him....that's silly, I know he will, but he will be months out and I'll be whiny, clear liquidy, and I've worked so hard to do everything.....I wasn't depressed before but I sure am now.

Colleen

[Guest guest]

Let me just see if I got this straight... She said that she would be able to analyze you within just a few minutes? She inquired about your how your deceased parents would feel about your having WLS, even though you had provided the information that your parents died more than 30 years ago? She suggested that you, a compulsive overeater, (no offense, but we all are), buy a cookie from the bagel shop? She stated to you that she recommends therapy for "everyone"?!! (And does a cardiologist recommend a treadmill test for everyone? Or a proctologist suggest a colonoscopy for everyone? Or a neurologist a brain scan? you get my drift...) She sounds as if she got her degree out of a Cracker Jack box! lol I don't know whether to laugh or be pissed for you.

Good luck and keep your chin up!!!

Pam bRandy Mendez wrote:

Hi Friends,

I need a friend right now. Randy is doing super! He has lost thirty pounds since surgery on August 2!!!! Woooo Hooooo! He tried his first food over the weekend, everything went great. We even went to the fair and he had a bit of Souix Burger, nothing bugs him, he isn't craving anything, he is full after a bite or two, He is great!

I, on the other hand , am so bummed out. Here is the goofy story. First of all, when it was Randy's turn for a shrink, he went to the Kaiser lady, signed, sealed, delivered...all done. I went with him, great. My turn came and the rules changed the week of my appt.it changed to a six month program, my PC doc signed me off, I'm not bananas, passed "GO" and went to my appt at UCLA. I got a "go directly to shrink card" so I called the lady they use, made the appt...or rather, she called, chatted with Randy and gave him my appt time to give to me, and complained that I should have seen her BEFORE I went to UCLA, that this is all wrong....oh well, it works. Now try to follow me here..... The day before THAT appt, she called to reschedule it, I told her I had already taken the day off, she agreed to keep the day, but change the time, instead of 11 am it was now 9 am. I left the house at 5:30 to get there, the 405 during rush hour in westwood, UGLY!!!! I got to her building at about 8,

found a 20 minute parking, had a cup of coffee and drove to the parking structure at 8:30, reasonable . For the sake of reader enjoyment, I will add that nobody was there yet, there was nowhere to sit, so right next to the docs door there was a fire escape. It's Brentwood, the fire escape was air conditioned, carpeted, I decided to sit there for a few minutes til she showed up. When I went to leave...the door was locked, I trucked down two flights of stairs, around the parking structure to the elevator, and still got there before the doc. When she showed up, she gave me instructions.... sit in the waiting room, and fill out 18 (that's right EIGHTEEN) pages of questions! Including drawing a picture of myself now and after surgery! She said it should take an hour, if I finish in less than an hour review the form and elaborate more.

THE APPOINTMENT.... she asked about my parents support for this...???!!!!! I figured "OK"? maybe she isn't on that page yet...they both passed away when I was a teen, over thirty years ago. After two hours, she told me, no lie, she was going to analize me in a few minutes time, I was getting more from her than I could get in years of therapy!!!! I was overweight from depression from whemn Randy was sick 18 years ago, because my parents died I was afraid of losing him too. Blah, Blah, Blah.... I went to years of therapy when all that happened.... Anyway, she said she would let UCLA know in a couple weeks, I asked if everything looked good...she repeated this two week time. I left the building. The parking attendant almost had a cow, she sent me to get validated for parking, it was a rate of 2.25 every 15 minutes and was close to 30 dollars. She would not take my money until I parked and tried to get my stub validated..... I saw the doc in the elevator, asked if she

validated....no. Then she asked why, when I told her....NO JOKE...... she told me to go down to the ground floor, buy a cookie and the bagel shop would validate me!!!!! Now, as I am biting my tongue, I'm in the elevator with her.....wanting so very much to say...."aren't you the eating disorder lady who just told me to buy a cookie?" .....but in the intrest of wanting a clean bill of mental health, I shut up. I bought a diet coke, and laughed all the way home!!!!!!

UCLA didn't like my EKG I had to get hospital records because the cardiologist kicked my referral back to the PC. Cardiologists are so pompous!!!! Then UCLA called to say the damn kooky cookie doctor said I need therapy for my depression!!!! So, now I have to go see a doc for this phantom depression.... when I called the cookie doc, she friggen said she wrote a "glowing recomendation for surgery!!" I asked her to please call UCLA and help them read her writing because they told me she wrote I need therapy!!!! She said she recomends that for everyone! I need to see a therapist once or twice, go to a couple support meetings, you guys don't count, it's not in person.... and thats the end of it. She told me people get depressed after surgery, I need to know what to do when that happens....well no shit! Randy just had his surgery , I helped him when he crashed and burned about two weeks out, and through the rash, and I understand(thanks to this board) about fat storing

hormones and that the hormones go crazy when they lose their happy fot home. But, in the interest of jumping through hoops , I finally got an appointment in SEPTEMBER, to see a new shrink.... I wasn't allowed to say "weight loss surgery" or no appt, but now I am depressed!!!! My window of oppretunity has slipped by, now I have to call UCLA and tell them I have to wait until December for surgery, I start full time classes at the college, work starts back up next week, And now I am depressed. I thought Randy and I would support each other, now he will be so far ahead of me, I don't know if he will be as patient as I was for him....that's silly, I know he will, but he will be months out and I'll be whiny, clear liquidy, and I've worked so hard to do everything.....I wasn't depressed before but I sure am now.__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Yup, that about sums it up. It sure feels good to be back "home" on this site, last week I went to a local support group, tonight I tried another one.... I love you guys all soooo much! While I can not talk crap about the locals here, they are not my people if you get my drift. The two support groups I went to both talked about what they wanted to talk about, tonights was not much more than a brief intro and a quick goodbye.... maybe I blinked and missed the meeting, but it was no support like I get here. Shell, thank you for starting this wildfire of greatness! , and all the rest! Thank you for taking Shell's lead and making it so accessible and comforting. Robynn, you are such a blessing, FYI I still haven't heard from the DMV after the "lapse of consciousness" fiasco! It's only been five months and several thousand dollars worth of tests to find out nothing..... but that is on the back burner with everything else. I'm just gonna do what I have to do and keep lots of

notes! WLS will come, in my mind...way way in the back of it, I keep thinking this delay might be for a good reason.... a sign to relax and take care of Randy and myself. Hey , while I'm blabbing..... what college are you going to? Is your major liberal studies? I'm at Cal State Bakersfield right now, I think I'll get my teaching credintial about the same month as my first social security check...lol.Actually if I keep it up, and hustle, I should have my BA in May. Hugs and more Hugs!!!! Sue and Randy in Palmdale. Pamela wrote:

Let me just see if I got this straight... She said that she would be able to analyze you within just a few minutes? She inquired about your how your deceased parents would feel about your having WLS, even though you had provided the information that your parents died more than 30 years ago? She suggested that you, a compulsive overeater, (no offense, but we all are), buy a cookie from the bagel shop? She stated to you that she recommends therapy for "everyone"?!! (And does a cardiologist recommend a treadmill test for everyone? Or a proctologist suggest a colonoscopy for everyone? Or a neurologist a brain scan? you get my drift...) She sounds as if she got her degree out of a Cracker Jack box! lol I don't know whether to laugh or be pissed for you.

Good luck and keep your chin up!!!

Pam bRandy Mendez wrote:

Hi Friends,

I need a friend right now. Randy is doing super! He has lost thirty pounds since surgery on August 2!!!! Woooo Hooooo! He tried his first food over the weekend, everything went great. We even went to the fair and he had a bit of Souix Burger, nothing bugs him, he isn't craving anything, he is full after a bite or two, He is great!

I, on the other hand , am so bummed out. Here is the goofy story. First of all, when it was Randy's turn for a shrink, he went to the Kaiser lady, signed, sealed, delivered...all done. I went with him, great. My turn came and the rules changed the week of my appt.it changed to a six month program, my PC doc signed me off, I'm not bananas, passed "GO" and went to my appt at UCLA. I got a "go directly to shrink card" so I called the lady they use, made the appt...or rather, she called, chatted with Randy and gave him my appt time to give to me, and complained that I should have seen her BEFORE I went to UCLA, that this is all wrong....oh well, it works. Now try to follow me here..... The day before THAT appt, she called to reschedule it, I told her I had already taken the day off, she agreed to keep the day, but change the time, instead of 11 am it was now 9 am. I left the house at 5:30 to get there, the 405 during rush hour in westwood, UGLY!!!! I got to her building at about 8,

found a 20 minute parking, had a cup of coffee and drove to the parking structure at 8:30, reasonable . For the sake of reader enjoyment, I will add that nobody was there yet, there was nowhere to sit, so right next to the docs door there was a fire escape. It's Brentwood, the fire escape was air conditioned, carpeted, I decided to sit there for a few minutes til she showed up. When I went to leave...the door was locked, I trucked down two flights of stairs, around the parking structure to the elevator, and still got there before the doc. When she showed up, she gave me instructions.... sit in the waiting room, and fill out 18 (that's right EIGHTEEN) pages of questions! Including drawing a picture of myself now and after surgery! She said it should take an hour, if I finish in less than an hour review the form and elaborate more.

THE APPOINTMENT.... she asked about my parents support for this...???!!!!! I figured "OK"? maybe she isn't on that page yet...they both passed away when I was a teen, over thirty years ago. After two hours, she told me, no lie, she was going to analize me in a few minutes time, I was getting more from her than I could get in years of therapy!!!! I was overweight from depression from whemn Randy was sick 18 years ago, because my parents died I was afraid of losing him too. Blah, Blah, Blah.... I went to years of therapy when all that happened.... Anyway, she said she would let UCLA know in a couple weeks, I asked if everything looked good...she repeated this two week time. I left the building. The parking attendant almost had a cow, she sent me to get validated for parking, it was a rate of 2.25 every 15 minutes and was close to 30 dollars. She would not take my money until I parked and tried to get my stub validated..... I saw the doc in the elevator, asked if she

validated....no. Then she asked why, when I told her....NO JOKE...... she told me to go down to the ground floor, buy a cookie and the bagel shop would validate me!!!!! Now, as I am biting my tongue, I'm in the elevator with her.....wanting so very much to say...."aren't you the eating disorder lady who just told me to buy a cookie?" .....but in the intrest of wanting a clean bill of mental health, I shut up. I bought a diet coke, and laughed all the way home!!!!!!

UCLA didn't like my EKG I had to get hospital records because the cardiologist kicked my referral back to the PC. Cardiologists are so pompous!!!! Then UCLA called to say the damn kooky cookie doctor said I need therapy for my depression!!!! So, now I have to go see a doc for this phantom depression.... when I called the cookie doc, she friggen said she wrote a "glowing recomendation for surgery!!" I asked her to please call UCLA and help them read her writing because they told me she wrote I need therapy!!!! She said she recomends that for everyone! I need to see a therapist once or twice, go to a couple support meetings, you guys don't count, it's not in person.... and thats the end of it. She told me people get depressed after surgery, I need to know what to do when that happens....well no shit! Randy just had his surgery , I helped him when he crashed and burned about two weeks out, and through the rash, and I understand(thanks to this board) about fat storing

hormones and that the hormones go crazy when they lose their happy fot home. But, in the interest of jumping through hoops , I finally got an appointment in SEPTEMBER, to see a new shrink.... I wasn't allowed to say "weight loss surgery" or no appt, but now I am depressed!!!! My window of oppretunity has slipped by, now I have to call UCLA and tell them I have to wait until December for surgery, I start full time classes at the college, work starts back up next week, And now I am depressed. I thought Randy and I would support each other, now he will be so far ahead of me, I don't know if he will be as patient as I was for him....that's silly, I know he will, but he will be months out and I'll be whiny, clear liquidy, and I've worked so hard to do everything.....I wasn't depressed before but I sure am now.

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