Rant was Re: Way off topic

[Guest guest]

Okay, here is another one. I have some very well-meaning friends with NT

children who have said things like, " Well, but is still lovable even

with autism. " Yeah, NO SH_ _ ! But that sure doesn't make my life any

easier!!! I just want to scream, " Well, he's not that lovable when he has

smeered poop all over the walls in his room and my room and all over the

carpet! " Of course, I just keep my mouth shut. Well, and of course, there

is always that wonderful sentiment, " Well, all kids do that! " Which is when

I scream, " NOT AT SIX YEARS OLD! "

Sorry. I'm over it now.

[Guest guest]

Oh my gawd I get a lot of comments like these. My favorite one is " my child

is ADD so I know exactly how you feel. " Ok... I do not mean to be MEAN but

her ADD child is in school, doing sports and can sit for a family photo

without an act of Gawd. My comment back " I am so glad I am not alone. "

What can you say??

I know I will receive " a get into heaven card " after that one! Ok.. now is

when you laugh and find humor in everything

A jeffs mom

Rant was Re: Way off topic

Okay, here is another one. I have some very well-meaning

friends with NT

children who have said things like, " Well, but is

still lovable even

with autism. " Yeah, NO SH_ _ ! But that sure doesn't make

my life any

easier!!! I just want to scream, " Well, he's not that

lovable when he has

smeered poop all over the walls in his room and my room and

all over the

carpet! " Of course, I just keep my mouth shut. Well, and

of course, there

is always that wonderful sentiment, " Well, all kids do

that! " Which is when

I scream, " NOT AT SIX YEARS OLD! "

Sorry. I'm over it now.

[Guest guest]

Well.. is it still well-meaning when someone tells you " Just let me have

him for a week or so, I'll get him straightened out " ?

My then three year old was non-verbal at that time, and their answer to

this was that at their house he wouldn't get anything till he asked for it.

That would straighten him out. Man, that one put me in shock. I didn't have

any answer for that, except when they started pushing me to let them have

him. And then I just said, " no, I don't think so " .

Lolita

> Okay, here is another one. I have some very well-meaning

>friends with NT

> children who have said things like, " Well, but is

>still lovable even

> with autism. " Yeah, NO SH_ _ ! But that sure doesn't make

>my life any

> easier!!! I just want to scream, " Well, he's not that

>lovable when he has

> smeered poop all over the walls in his room and my room and

>all over the

> carpet! " Of course, I just keep my mouth shut. Well, and

>of course, there

> is always that wonderful sentiment, " Well, all kids do

>that! " Which is when

> I scream, " NOT AT SIX YEARS OLD! "

> Sorry. I'm over it now.

>

[Guest guest]

To add another one to your list, my good friend has a 4 year old daughter who

they think might be ADHD and she is in early intervention at a local

preschool that has a program for children and parents (it's not a preschool

program) anyways there is a lottery for this preschool because so many

parents want their children, normal and children with problems, to go there.

First are the children with problems and then they have a lottery for the

rest. Well recently they had registrations for next year and my friend said

that she was so happy that her daughter didn't get into the school because

they must think she is normal and not have alot of problems (but she said it

in a very ignorant way) and I usually keep my mouth shut but I basically told

her that was a sh&*&* thing to say since my son was taken into the program

for 2 years . That really hurt, even though I'm sure she didn't mean it the

way it came out it still kills your heart.

MA

[Guest guest]

Don't get me started !!! UGH It's amazing what people say, isn't it.

Tari in Texas

Rant was Re: Way off topic

> Okay, here is another one. I have some very well-meaning friends with NT

> children who have said things like, " Well, but is still lovable

even

> with autism. " Yeah, NO SH_ _ ! But that sure doesn't make my life any

> easier!!! I just want to scream, " Well, he's not that lovable when he has

> smeered poop all over the walls in his room and my room and all over the

> carpet! " Of course, I just keep my mouth shut. Well, and of course,

there

> is always that wonderful sentiment, " Well, all kids do that! " Which is

when

> I scream, " NOT AT SIX YEARS OLD! "

> Sorry. I'm over it now.

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/27/01 2:42:03 PM Eastern Standard Time, lita@...

writes:

> Well.. is it still well-meaning when someone tells you " Just let me have

> him for a week or so, I'll get him straightened out " ?

>

I'm sure in their narrow little minds, it was well-meaning. My girlfriend

still says this to me. Any time I complain about any problems we are having,

she'll say, " Well, that is why you should just drop him off with me. " In her

case, she just means that she will keep him to give us a break, but I have a

hard time taking it that way. She is extremely disorganized and her house is

always an absolute wreck--even worse than mine. So when she says this I

think, " There is NO way I would leave him over there. " Of course, she is one

of my friends who loves my son so much that she just doesn't see any thing

wrong with him. When I told her about his smeering poop on walls, etc again,

she asked why he was doing that. I said, " Duh, because he is autistic! " Oh

well. We should just let it roll of our backs and remember that we have

understanding here on this list!

Best wishes,

[Guest guest]

Hi -

Had to chime in about " well meaning " people. My father-in-law's wife

(my hubby refuses to call her step mom) is a real corker. They came

to visit us right after we got Vico's diagnosis. We were trying to

deal with it all and she kept trying to point out that there really

wasn't anything wrong with him at all. I had already faced this

phenomenon from other caring people - they want to make it all better

and tell you that you don't have to worry. I do understand that

instinct - I have it myself. However, this lady lacks tact and common

sense.

She says to me " I don't think he's Autistic, I think he's just slow. "

Well, thanks.... that makes me feel soooooo much better.

I think she really thought she was cheering me up. As my mother would

say " Bless her pointed head. "

I had real trouble with that, but now I just laugh about it.

Fortunately, she is not part of our close circle and has little

involvement in our lives, so it makes it easier to ignore her...

Whatever - just thought I would share.

Moira

Mom to Vico (4 ASD and NOT slow) and Culzean (almost 11 months!)