Re: Birthday Party Delima/ HELP!

[Guest guest]

Three options.

Serve cupcakes that the other kids will eat and serve your son his own

" Special Cake " that's just for him. Serve a veggie/fruit tray. Some

of the kids will eat some of the stuff. The others will not. Their

own choice. Serve white grape juice to drink.

Have his party some place besides your house (a park or kiddie place)

and get a babysitter for your little ones. That way they cannot get

into any of the non-allowed foods. I know this sounds odd, but the

parties I've been to for 5 year olds and their friends do not involve

younger siblings anyway. Plus, Kiki does not enjoy the noise and

commotion. She would probably rather not attend anyway at this point

in time.

Have a completely SCD celebration for him at home involving your other

two children on his actual birthday.

OR

Have a birthday party with no food. This will require a lot of

planning on your part. But you could buy craft supplies and plan

games to take up the whole birthday party time. If you aren't morally

opposed to Mc's, you could go there and get ice cream cards

(gift certificates) and put them in the gift bags to hand out to the

kids. You can put little toys in the gift bags. Bouncy balls,

parachute men, etc.

I would still consider a sitter for the littlest two for the party

though because you will need to be completely vigilant to keep control

of the crafts and games.

OR

Just tell him that you are having a family (not extended family) party

and serve SCD food.

I would just not invite any of the extended family to any of these

parties. If they are just going to make it stressful for you. I'd

just politely say " He's having a party with his friends from school

this year " or we aren't having a party this year. And let that be that.

Jody

mom to -7 and -9

SCD 1/03

[Guest guest]

www.digestivewellness.com has all kinds of SCD legal treats that all kids will

eat. Cookies, apple chips, fruit leathers, Lara bars, honey sticks, nut bars,

applesauce cups, dried friut, roasted nuts, 'granola', etc.

Most of these treats can be sliced or cut up and put in serving bowls.

That way kids can just snack!

Agape,

" Jody G. " wrote:

Three options.

Serve cupcakes that the other kids will eat and serve your son his own

" Special Cake " that's just for him. Serve a veggie/fruit tray. Some

of the kids will eat some of the stuff. The others will not. Their

own choice. Serve white grape juice to drink.

Have his party some place besides your house (a park or kiddie place)

and get a babysitter for your little ones. That way they cannot get

into any of the non-allowed foods. I know this sounds odd, but the

parties I've been to for 5 year olds and their friends do not involve

younger siblings anyway. Plus, Kiki does not enjoy the noise and

commotion. She would probably rather not attend anyway at this point

in time.

Have a completely SCD celebration for him at home involving your other

two children on his actual birthday.

OR

Have a birthday party with no food. This will require a lot of

planning on your part. But you could buy craft supplies and plan

games to take up the whole birthday party time. If you aren't morally

opposed to Mc's, you could go there and get ice cream cards

(gift certificates) and put them in the gift bags to hand out to the

kids. You can put little toys in the gift bags. Bouncy balls,

parachute men, etc.

I would still consider a sitter for the littlest two for the party

though because you will need to be completely vigilant to keep control

of the crafts and games.

OR

Just tell him that you are having a family (not extended family) party

and serve SCD food.

I would just not invite any of the extended family to any of these

parties. If they are just going to make it stressful for you. I'd

just politely say " He's having a party with his friends from school

this year " or we aren't having a party this year. And let that be that.

Jody

mom to -7 and -9

SCD 1/03

For information on the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, please read the book

_Breaking the Vicious Cycle_ by Elaine Gottschall and read the following

websites:

http://www.breakingtheviciouscycle.info

and

http://www.pecanbread.com

[Guest guest]

www.digestivewellness.com has all kinds of SCD legal treats that all kids will

eat. Cookies, apple chips, fruit leathers, Lara bars, honey sticks, nut bars,

applesauce cups, dried friut, roasted nuts, 'granola', etc.

Most of these treats can be sliced or cut up and put in serving bowls.

That way kids can just snack!

Agape,

" Jody G. " wrote:

Three options.

Serve cupcakes that the other kids will eat and serve your son his own

" Special Cake " that's just for him. Serve a veggie/fruit tray. Some

of the kids will eat some of the stuff. The others will not. Their

own choice. Serve white grape juice to drink.

Have his party some place besides your house (a park or kiddie place)

and get a babysitter for your little ones. That way they cannot get

into any of the non-allowed foods. I know this sounds odd, but the

parties I've been to for 5 year olds and their friends do not involve

younger siblings anyway. Plus, Kiki does not enjoy the noise and

commotion. She would probably rather not attend anyway at this point

in time.

Have a completely SCD celebration for him at home involving your other

two children on his actual birthday.

OR

Have a birthday party with no food. This will require a lot of

planning on your part. But you could buy craft supplies and plan

games to take up the whole birthday party time. If you aren't morally

opposed to Mc's, you could go there and get ice cream cards

(gift certificates) and put them in the gift bags to hand out to the

kids. You can put little toys in the gift bags. Bouncy balls,

parachute men, etc.

I would still consider a sitter for the littlest two for the party

though because you will need to be completely vigilant to keep control

of the crafts and games.

OR

Just tell him that you are having a family (not extended family) party

and serve SCD food.

I would just not invite any of the extended family to any of these

parties. If they are just going to make it stressful for you. I'd

just politely say " He's having a party with his friends from school

this year " or we aren't having a party this year. And let that be that.

Jody

mom to -7 and -9

SCD 1/03

For information on the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, please read the book

_Breaking the Vicious Cycle_ by Elaine Gottschall and read the following

websites:

http://www.breakingtheviciouscycle.info

and

http://www.pecanbread.com

[Guest guest]

I agree that birthdays are major stress. We had 2 in the first 2

months of SCD. For the most part it was just family/extended family

but this was still major stress.

I planned food that we could eat and the rest had the privelege of

eating it or not. I have really stressed to my son and his family

and to my daughter that NOTHING comes into the house that is not

allowed for my kids to have. They are all adults and teenagers, I

have a 5 and 6 yr old. I expect the adults/teenagers to take

responsivilty and not make it more difficult for my kids.

I guess I have been pretty hard with this and I know have offended

my daugher in law a couple of times with it. We were not invited to

the birthday party they had for one of their sons(teen). That was

ok with us. We got him a gift card and saved everyone much stress

again.

I know that this probly doesn't help you in your situation.

Sandy M.

>

> Hey guys,

>

> Went to pecan bread for birthday solutions. Didn't say much on

how

> to handle the comments (emotional crap)....about the " strange "

> foods... " strange kids " ...... The neighbors and family already have

a

> understanding about why we are doing this SCDiet...some respect

but

> not 100%...our son has many friends....we don't expect 100%

> understanding just compliance when he is out their house...BUT...

> Son wants to have a B-day party AGAIN....feeling a little

> overwhlemded by the whole thing. He will be five...at the age

where

> kids get RUDE and hurtful (and often open up their sweet mouths

and

> say not so sweet things to each other...about food that isn't

> that " sweet " !)...he has already been hurt by their comments

> (everyone is getting old enough to realize how " strange " WE

> are.......so young to be having to learn such a tough lesson. Heck

> it is hard for his parents (dealing with others) and we are in our

> late thirties! Other parents are a pain to cope with!

>

> These are his freinds (that I might add eat at Mcs and fast

> food a minimum of one to two times a week.........eat cookies,

candy

> and pop every day.......and he doesn't want to feel wierd

> anymore....but he is different....or they are

> different...anyhow...there is a difference.... and I don't know

how

> to help him deal with it. My husband and I on the most part where

> out casts (different)way before the SCD diet...As parents we do't

> have any coping skills to share from childhood experience. WE both

> hated Birthday parties...social gatherings...and avoided them with

a

> vengence!

>

> Last years B-day party was a food flop...this is when we thought

it

> was " just " about Celiac Disease and " gluten free foods " ...it was

> difficult (very expensive GF/CF cupcakes all around the table half

> eaten and wasted...hot dogs without buns...feared that KiKI would

> eat a crumb if we used gluten buns/that's all it will take with

> her...a lousy crumb). This years party when we pull out the SCD

> treats and foods this years party....God help us.....or God help

the

> trash can! Almost can't stand the thought of it.....so $ to have

> this happen again! At least will be behaving better...none

of

> that crazy " bully " behavior.

>

> KiKI will be two this May also....she is still so " shy " that a

party

> would be traumatic still...won't go that route! Her first

Birthday

> we put a candle in a papaya...and celebrated it alone...She

couldn't

> do grain and dairy......so we thought.....now we know it

wasn't...it

> was the starches, sugar and a true allergy to gluten (any

> how)....Grandparents always expect to see her. Yet at every get

> together...this becomes a night mare and very stressful for

> all...everyone thinks that she doesn't like them.....they give all

> the attention to Bubbles...who acts like a normal baby......and

> then ...KiKI looks so sad (wants to interact but her " brain " won't

> let her)..... emotionaly shuts down and " disappears " and is just

> miserabel!.....that night we usualy have delerium/sizures......

> NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT ASD EITHER!!!! This doesn't help...heck they

> don't even want to admit the doctor confirmed Celiac Disease in

all

> of us! Maybe DAN will help to validate....then they will just

think

> he is a quack...they take this so personal...an insult to the

family

> GENES! God forbid that our genes may be screwed! ANY HOW.....

>

> ...have a plan: two visits between the two couples/grandparents

> (less overwhelming to someone with ASD)....hoping that they

> don't " look " at her and " talk " to her too much...or she will

> disappear on us again...she is doing better but not that well

> yet!....when she " disappears " , she wants nurse the entire

time...AT

> TWO YEARS OLD...we try to keep this a secret...they don't

understand

> this eather...nursed son until 40 months old when he naturaly

> weanted. I end up stairs where I feel me " captive " , trying to get

> her to become " grounded " enough to rejoin the get together! Cries

> otherwise non stop........or forces herslef into a stress induced

> sleep! It is horrible...I hate holidays and company! Maybe

someday

> we will all be " normal " ! Tired of feelin isolated and captive!

It

> has just been a few weeks ago that she could tolerate going to the

> store and playing in the front yard with the nieghbors!

>

> Sorry so long...had to explain....

>

> Any ideas...?

>

> Sincerely, Antoinette

> (SCD entire family day 41/CD,DH,multiple sensitivity,

> ADd,ADHD,ASD..and so much more!)

>

[Guest guest]

Why do all school and childrens events have to be revolved around food? It is so

frustrating. For BD parties, I bring a cupcake from home for my son. I hover

around,

and when the cake comes out. I say something about food allergies. I do not go

into

details. Or, I bring up wheat allergy. I know I am not being totally up-front,

but it is

just easier.

His pre-school teacher lets me know when parents are sending cupcakes to school,

and I send a special one for my kid. Sometimes I'll send several to keep in the

freezer.

Everyday, there is another food related activity to negotiate. Our public school

is

trying to encourage parents to read to their kids. We were supposed to read 20

books

a month, and keep a list. At the end of the month, each kid is rewarded with a

free

pizza coupon! Is food the only reward kids will respond to?

> >

> > Hey guys,

> >

> > Went to pecan bread for birthday solutions. Didn't say much on

> how

> > to handle the comments (emotional crap)....about the " strange "

> > foods... " strange kids " ...... The neighbors and family already have

> a

> > understanding about why we are doing this SCDiet...some respect

> but

> > not 100%...our son has many friends....we don't expect 100%

> > understanding just compliance when he is out their house...BUT...

> > Son wants to have a B-day party AGAIN....feeling a little

> > overwhlemded by the whole thing. He will be five...at the age

> where

> > kids get RUDE and hurtful (and often open up their sweet mouths

> and

> > say not so sweet things to each other...about food that isn't

> > that " sweet " !)...he has already been hurt by their comments

> > (everyone is getting old enough to realize how " strange " WE

> > are.......so young to be having to learn such a tough lesson. Heck

> > it is hard for his parents (dealing with others) and we are in our

> > late thirties! Other parents are a pain to cope with!

> >

> > These are his freinds (that I might add eat at Mcs and fast

> > food a minimum of one to two times a week.........eat cookies,

> candy

> > and pop every day.......and he doesn't want to feel wierd

> > anymore....but he is different....or they are

> > different...anyhow...there is a difference.... and I don't know

> how

> > to help him deal with it. My husband and I on the most part where

> > out casts (different)way before the SCD diet...As parents we do't

> > have any coping skills to share from childhood experience. WE both

> > hated Birthday parties...social gatherings...and avoided them with

> a

> > vengence!

> >

> > Last years B-day party was a food flop...this is when we thought

> it

> > was " just " about Celiac Disease and " gluten free foods " ...it was

> > difficult (very expensive GF/CF cupcakes all around the table half

> > eaten and wasted...hot dogs without buns...feared that KiKI would

> > eat a crumb if we used gluten buns/that's all it will take with

> > her...a lousy crumb). This years party when we pull out the SCD

> > treats and foods this years party....God help us.....or God help

> the

> > trash can! Almost can't stand the thought of it.....so $ to have

> > this happen again! At least will be behaving better...none

> of

> > that crazy " bully " behavior.

> >

> > KiKI will be two this May also....she is still so " shy " that a

> party

> > would be traumatic still...won't go that route! Her first

> Birthday

> > we put a candle in a papaya...and celebrated it alone...She

> couldn't

> > do grain and dairy......so we thought.....now we know it

> wasn't...it

> > was the starches, sugar and a true allergy to gluten (any

> > how)....Grandparents always expect to see her. Yet at every get

> > together...this becomes a night mare and very stressful for

> > all...everyone thinks that she doesn't like them.....they give all

> > the attention to Bubbles...who acts like a normal baby......and

> > then ...KiKI looks so sad (wants to interact but her " brain " won't

> > let her)..... emotionaly shuts down and " disappears " and is just

> > miserabel!.....that night we usualy have delerium/sizures......

> > NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT ASD EITHER!!!! This doesn't help...heck they

> > don't even want to admit the doctor confirmed Celiac Disease in

> all

> > of us! Maybe DAN will help to validate....then they will just

> think

> > he is a quack...they take this so personal...an insult to the

> family

> > GENES! God forbid that our genes may be screwed! ANY HOW.....

> >

> > ...have a plan: two visits between the two couples/grandparents

> > (less overwhelming to someone with ASD)....hoping that they

> > don't " look " at her and " talk " to her too much...or she will

> > disappear on us again...she is doing better but not that well

> > yet!....when she " disappears " , she wants nurse the entire

> time...AT

> > TWO YEARS OLD...we try to keep this a secret...they don't

> understand

> > this eather...nursed son until 40 months old when he naturaly

> > weanted. I end up stairs where I feel me " captive " , trying to get

> > her to become " grounded " enough to rejoin the get together! Cries

> > otherwise non stop........or forces herslef into a stress induced

> > sleep! It is horrible...I hate holidays and company! Maybe

> someday

> > we will all be " normal " ! Tired of feelin isolated and captive!

> It

> > has just been a few weeks ago that she could tolerate going to the

> > store and playing in the front yard with the nieghbors!

> >

> > Sorry so long...had to explain....

> >

> > Any ideas...?

> >

> > Sincerely, Antoinette

> > (SCD entire family day 41/CD,DH,multiple sensitivity,

> > ADd,ADHD,ASD..and so much more!)

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Everyone had such good ideas, that I won't try to improve. Yes, it

is hard, but let me also suggest after many years of dealing with

gf/df/sf etc, etc. diets and also from nursing my children so long,

that I think my attitude is what makes all the difference to the

outside world. If I act VERY confident and very happy with our

choices people don't feel the right to ask offending questions. But

when I've acted like, " well, we're trying this (think whiney voice) "

then people seem to think it invites their comments.

And a party is a great opportunity to teach five year olds that

people are different and we can all be respectful. Sometimes being

really upfront is the best way to deal with five year olds. Like

saying, " We all eat different things taht make our tummies feel

happy, and we are sharing some of our favorite things with you all

today. If you don't like something just simple leave it on your

plate, we don't need to talk about it. " There's nothing wrong with

teaching five year olds at a party some manners. Maybe also just

picking a couple of kids would make it easier too - Less mob

mentality to deal with.

I know you can be confident and happy from listening to your e-

mails! I know you can pull off a fun wonderful birthday for your

son! So good luck.

Colby

[Guest guest]

" www.digestivewellness.com has all kinds of SCD legal treats that all

kids will eat. Cookies, apple chips, fruit leathers, Lara bars, honey

sticks, nut bars, applesauce cups, dried friut, roasted nuts,

'granola', etc.

Most of these treats can be sliced or cut up and put in serving bowls. "

,

I find that most " regular " kids will not eat these things. Not sweet

enough. They take one bite and then waste the rest. I've quit giving

SCD legal treats to kids who come over because it's just too expensive.

Antoinette was talking about how strapped she is for money right now.

I just don't think that it is financially wise to spend that kind of

money on SCD treats that most kids won't eat. I did that 2 years ago

for the boys parties and it was a waste of money. And the boys were

actually a lot more sad about it... to see food they love wasted and

thrown out and their friends not eating anything.

So, this past year, I made regular chocolate cake mini-cakes (from a

box mix) and I made the 14-date cake mini-cakes for my boys. I served

Breyer's ice cream for the other kids and homemade SCD ice cream for

my boys. Everyone was a lot happier. The kids who came ate what was

served and my boys liked it a lot better that their friends enjoyed

their food.

They have a couple of friends who eat more " natural " food who will eat

things like fruit leather and Lara Bar type items, but for the most

part the kids we know will not eat them. Their taste buds are too

used to corn syrup sweetness in everything.

3 years ago, I served only ice cream at 's party. Regular

Breyer's peach ice cream for all but 4 casein free kids and I made SCD

ice cream (also peach) that looked just like the Breyer's. The kids

did not notice any difference. I think for 's birthday that

year I just made him some cookies because the place I had the party

served a giant birthday cookie. He blew out the candles and the other

kids ate that cookie while he (and ) had homemade.

Jody

mom to -7 and -9

SCD 1/03

[Guest guest]

There is a recipe for meringue cookies in the cookbook SCD with Taste and

Tradition. The

recipe is called snow kisses. These meringues are very good but a little bit

sticky (due to the

honey). Any kid who would eat the meringues sold in the stores would eat these.

The recipe

is very simple.

Carolyn

[Guest guest]

Hi Antoinette,

I have been watching this list for about a month or so. I am so intrigued by

the entire BTVC process, and have been able to share all of my new knowledge

with my Hubby...we have a family full of issues, although nothing so outright

GI-related, just asthma, depression, ADHD, PDD-NOS, and all the symptoms related

to these labels.. the gut-brain connection is really amazing!!! I have been in

nursing school for the last 3 years and NEVER has this relationship been

mentioned. The neuro-rehab psychologist that evaluated and diagnosed my

daughter never made the connection. Our pediatrician never asked about dietary

issues. COMPLETELY AMAZING...anyway, all of this to say:

for birthday parties, we have always done what is best for our family. We have

always lived on one income and couldn't afford big parties and lots of kids.

plus the goodie bags are always a nightmare!!!

An idea I use is a party in mid afternoon, so everyone feeds their kids first!!

Then my goodie bags have just prizes in them, you know the type, rings,

balloons, etc from the dollar store. Then go to local fast food joints and get

their coupons for a free cone or other treat-think halloween??? 's, McD's,

Friendly's etc or a local ice cream place, and put the coupon in the goodie bag.

No stress for you or your family, the guests get what they come looking for!!!

scavenger hunt games are great for all ages and electrical tape comes in many

colors at the dollar store, to color code sticks, rocks, what have you for the

hunt!!!

Good Luck and we will be starting the SCD at semester's end!!!

[Guest guest]

" It is less expensive to feed the 'regular' kids just cut up fruit

and veggies, but even though it's easier and cheaper to get them

Little Debbie's or something equally as gross... now I feel kind of

guilty about it. "

I agree about feeling a bit bad feeding the other kids junk food. But

I feel worse serving a cake that the other kids don't like because my

kids are sad when the other kids don't enjoy what is served.

So, I made a veggie and fruit tray and then served the chocolate mini

cakes (box mix) and Breyer's ice cream. It seemed to be the best of

both worlds. My kids ate their own little cakes and everyone chose

the fruits/veggies to his/her own liking and everyone was happy.

Jody

mom to -7 and -9

SCD 1/03

[Guest guest]

SOOOO true!!! If I sent a SCD cupcake every time they pass out treats at my

daughters school, I'd have to send them every day. I have a basket of prizes

at home (and I throw in a few quarters now and then) I tell Holli that when

they pass out treats at school she can pick a prize instead when she gets

home. There seems to be very little trauma and I think it helps the teachers

realize how often they do it.

Kerri

Re: Birthday Party Delima/ HELP!

> Why do all school and childrens events have to be revolved around food? It

> is so

> frustrating. For BD parties, I bring a cupcake from home for my son. I

> hover around,

> and when the cake comes out. I say something about food allergies. I do

> not go into

> details. Or, I bring up wheat allergy. I know I am not being totally

> up-front, but it is

> just easier.

>

> His pre-school teacher lets me know when parents are sending cupcakes to

> school,

> and I send a special one for my kid. Sometimes I'll send several to keep

> in the freezer.

>

> Everyday, there is another food related activity to negotiate. Our public

> school is

> trying to encourage parents to read to their kids. We were supposed to

> read 20 books

> a month, and keep a list. At the end of the month, each kid is rewarded

> with a free

> pizza coupon! Is food the only reward kids will respond to?

>

>

>> >

>> > Hey guys,

>> >

>> > Went to pecan bread for birthday solutions. Didn't say much on

>> how

>> > to handle the comments (emotional crap)....about the " strange "

>> > foods... " strange kids " ...... The neighbors and family already have

>> a

>> > understanding about why we are doing this SCDiet...some respect

>> but

>> > not 100%...our son has many friends....we don't expect 100%

>> > understanding just compliance when he is out their house...BUT...

>> > Son wants to have a B-day party AGAIN....feeling a little

>> > overwhlemded by the whole thing. He will be five...at the age

>> where

>> > kids get RUDE and hurtful (and often open up their sweet mouths

>> and

>> > say not so sweet things to each other...about food that isn't

>> > that " sweet " !)...he has already been hurt by their comments

>> > (everyone is getting old enough to realize how " strange " WE

>> > are.......so young to be having to learn such a tough lesson. Heck

>> > it is hard for his parents (dealing with others) and we are in our

>> > late thirties! Other parents are a pain to cope with!

>> >

>> > These are his freinds (that I might add eat at Mcs and fast

>> > food a minimum of one to two times a week.........eat cookies,

>> candy

>> > and pop every day.......and he doesn't want to feel wierd

>> > anymore....but he is different....or they are

>> > different...anyhow...there is a difference.... and I don't know

>> how

>> > to help him deal with it. My husband and I on the most part where

>> > out casts (different)way before the SCD diet...As parents we do't

>> > have any coping skills to share from childhood experience. WE both

>> > hated Birthday parties...social gatherings...and avoided them with

>> a

>> > vengence!

>> >

>> > Last years B-day party was a food flop...this is when we thought

>> it

>> > was " just " about Celiac Disease and " gluten free foods " ...it was

>> > difficult (very expensive GF/CF cupcakes all around the table half

>> > eaten and wasted...hot dogs without buns...feared that KiKI would

>> > eat a crumb if we used gluten buns/that's all it will take with

>> > her...a lousy crumb). This years party when we pull out the SCD

>> > treats and foods this years party....God help us.....or God help

>> the

>> > trash can! Almost can't stand the thought of it.....so $ to have

>> > this happen again! At least will be behaving better...none

>> of

>> > that crazy " bully " behavior.

>> >

>> > KiKI will be two this May also....she is still so " shy " that a

>> party

>> > would be traumatic still...won't go that route! Her first

>> Birthday

>> > we put a candle in a papaya...and celebrated it alone...She

>> couldn't

>> > do grain and dairy......so we thought.....now we know it

>> wasn't...it

>> > was the starches, sugar and a true allergy to gluten (any

>> > how)....Grandparents always expect to see her. Yet at every get

>> > together...this becomes a night mare and very stressful for

>> > all...everyone thinks that she doesn't like them.....they give all

>> > the attention to Bubbles...who acts like a normal baby......and

>> > then ...KiKI looks so sad (wants to interact but her " brain " won't

>> > let her)..... emotionaly shuts down and " disappears " and is just

>> > miserabel!.....that night we usualy have delerium/sizures......

>> > NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT ASD EITHER!!!! This doesn't help...heck they

>> > don't even want to admit the doctor confirmed Celiac Disease in

>> all

>> > of us! Maybe DAN will help to validate....then they will just

>> think

>> > he is a quack...they take this so personal...an insult to the

>> family

>> > GENES! God forbid that our genes may be screwed! ANY HOW.....

>> >

>> > ...have a plan: two visits between the two couples/grandparents

>> > (less overwhelming to someone with ASD)....hoping that they

>> > don't " look " at her and " talk " to her too much...or she will

>> > disappear on us again...she is doing better but not that well

>> > yet!....when she " disappears " , she wants nurse the entire

>> time...AT

>> > TWO YEARS OLD...we try to keep this a secret...they don't

>> understand

>> > this eather...nursed son until 40 months old when he naturaly

>> > weanted. I end up stairs where I feel me " captive " , trying to get

>> > her to become " grounded " enough to rejoin the get together! Cries

>> > otherwise non stop........or forces herslef into a stress induced

>> > sleep! It is horrible...I hate holidays and company! Maybe

>> someday

>> > we will all be " normal " ! Tired of feelin isolated and captive!

>> It

>> > has just been a few weeks ago that she could tolerate going to the

>> > store and playing in the front yard with the nieghbors!

>> >

>> > Sorry so long...had to explain....

>> >

>> > Any ideas...?

>> >

>> > Sincerely, Antoinette

>> > (SCD entire family day 41/CD,DH,multiple sensitivity,

>> > ADd,ADHD,ASD..and so much more!)

>> >

>>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> For information on the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, please read the book

> _Breaking the Vicious Cycle_ by Elaine Gottschall and read the following

> websites:

> http://www.breakingtheviciouscycle.info

> and

> http://www.pecanbread.com

>

>

[Guest guest]

I like the idea about a craft party and no or very limited snacks (eg.

chicken wings in a crazy box or a special drinking cup for them all.). you

can make gift boxes, like in some adult parties, and give them to the kids

on their way home/out. there you can put anything you want, candy, a small

toy or a combo. doesn't have to be scd or expensive.

about guilt, the parents can decide whether to feed them or not those

candies, let them decide.

I would always do whatever makes my kids happy, and allow people to

celebrate with us if it is not going to jeopardize my kid's party. if public

opinion matters to you, you can have a very nice party with minimal or no

food and still keep your children safe, which is the ONLY thing that matters

after all.

good luck and enjoy your party.

>

> SOOOO true!!! If I sent a SCD cupcake every time they pass out treats at

> my

> daughters school, I'd have to send them every day. I have a basket of

> prizes

> at home (and I throw in a few quarters now and then) I tell Holli that

> when

> they pass out treats at school she can pick a prize instead when she gets

> home. There seems to be very little trauma and I think it helps the

> teachers

> realize how often they do it.

> Kerri

> Re: Birthday Party Delima/ HELP!

>

>

> > Why do all school and childrens events have to be revolved around food?

> It

> > is so

> > frustrating. For BD parties, I bring a cupcake from home for my son. I

> > hover around,

> > and when the cake comes out. I say something about food allergies. I do

> > not go into

> > details. Or, I bring up wheat allergy. I know I am not being totally

> > up-front, but it is

> > just easier.

> >

> > His pre-school teacher lets me know when parents are sending cupcakes to

> > school,

> > and I send a special one for my kid. Sometimes I'll send several to keep

> > in the freezer.

> >

> > Everyday, there is another food related activity to negotiate. Our

> public

> > school is

> > trying to encourage parents to read to their kids. We were supposed to

> > read 20 books

> > a month, and keep a list. At the end of the month, each kid is rewarded

> > with a free

> > pizza coupon! Is food the only reward kids will respond to?

> >

> >

> >> >

> >> > Hey guys,

> >> >

> >> > Went to pecan bread for birthday solutions. Didn't say much on

> >> how

> >> > to handle the comments (emotional crap)....about the " strange "

> >> > foods... " strange kids " ...... The neighbors and family already have

> >> a

> >> > understanding about why we are doing this SCDiet...some respect

> >> but

> >> > not 100%...our son has many friends....we don't expect 100%

> >> > understanding just compliance when he is out their house...BUT...

> >> > Son wants to have a B-day party AGAIN....feeling a little

> >> > overwhlemded by the whole thing. He will be five...at the age

> >> where

> >> > kids get RUDE and hurtful (and often open up their sweet mouths

> >> and

> >> > say not so sweet things to each other...about food that isn't

> >> > that " sweet " !)...he has already been hurt by their comments

> >> > (everyone is getting old enough to realize how " strange " WE

> >> > are.......so young to be having to learn such a tough lesson. Heck

> >> > it is hard for his parents (dealing with others) and we are in our

> >> > late thirties! Other parents are a pain to cope with!

> >> >

> >> > These are his freinds (that I might add eat at Mcs and fast

> >> > food a minimum of one to two times a week.........eat cookies,

> >> candy

> >> > and pop every day.......and he doesn't want to feel wierd

> >> > anymore....but he is different....or they are

> >> > different...anyhow...there is a difference.... and I don't know

> >> how

> >> > to help him deal with it. My husband and I on the most part where

> >> > out casts (different)way before the SCD diet...As parents we do't

> >> > have any coping skills to share from childhood experience. WE both

> >> > hated Birthday parties...social gatherings...and avoided them with

> >> a

> >> > vengence!

> >> >

> >> > Last years B-day party was a food flop...this is when we thought

> >> it

> >> > was " just " about Celiac Disease and " gluten free foods " ...it was

> >> > difficult (very expensive GF/CF cupcakes all around the table half

> >> > eaten and wasted...hot dogs without buns...feared that KiKI would

> >> > eat a crumb if we used gluten buns/that's all it will take with

> >> > her...a lousy crumb). This years party when we pull out the SCD

> >> > treats and foods this years party....God help us.....or God help

> >> the

> >> > trash can! Almost can't stand the thought of it.....so $ to have

> >> > this happen again! At least will be behaving better...none

> >> of

> >> > that crazy " bully " behavior.

> >> >

> >> > KiKI will be two this May also....she is still so " shy " that a

> >> party

> >> > would be traumatic still...won't go that route! Her first

> >> Birthday

> >> > we put a candle in a papaya...and celebrated it alone...She

> >> couldn't

> >> > do grain and dairy......so we thought.....now we know it

> >> wasn't...it

> >> > was the starches, sugar and a true allergy to gluten (any

> >> > how)....Grandparents always expect to see her. Yet at every get

> >> > together...this becomes a night mare and very stressful for

> >> > all...everyone thinks that she doesn't like them.....they give all

> >> > the attention to Bubbles...who acts like a normal baby......and

> >> > then ...KiKI looks so sad (wants to interact but her " brain " won't

> >> > let her)..... emotionaly shuts down and " disappears " and is just

> >> > miserabel!.....that night we usualy have delerium/sizures......

> >> > NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT ASD EITHER!!!! This doesn't help...heck they

> >> > don't even want to admit the doctor confirmed Celiac Disease in

> >> all

> >> > of us! Maybe DAN will help to validate....then they will just

> >> think

> >> > he is a quack...they take this so personal...an insult to the

> >> family

> >> > GENES! God forbid that our genes may be screwed! ANY HOW.....

> >> >

> >> > ...have a plan: two visits between the two couples/grandparents

> >> > (less overwhelming to someone with ASD)....hoping that they

> >> > don't " look " at her and " talk " to her too much...or she will

> >> > disappear on us again...she is doing better but not that well

> >> > yet!....when she " disappears " , she wants nurse the entire

> >> time...AT

> >> > TWO YEARS OLD...we try to keep this a secret...they don't

> >> understand

> >> > this eather...nursed son until 40 months old when he naturaly

> >> > weanted. I end up stairs where I feel me " captive " , trying to get

> >> > her to become " grounded " enough to rejoin the get together! Cries

> >> > otherwise non stop........or forces herslef into a stress induced

> >> > sleep! It is horrible...I hate holidays and company! Maybe

> >> someday

> >> > we will all be " normal " ! Tired of feelin isolated and captive!

> >> It

> >> > has just been a few weeks ago that she could tolerate going to the

> >> > store and playing in the front yard with the nieghbors!

> >> >

> >> > Sorry so long...had to explain....

> >> >

> >> > Any ideas...?

> >> >

> >> > Sincerely, Antoinette

> >> > (SCD entire family day 41/CD,DH,multiple sensitivity,

> >> > ADd,ADHD,ASD..and so much more!)

> >> >

> >>

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > For information on the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, please read the book

> > _Breaking the Vicious Cycle_ by Elaine Gottschall and read the

> following

> > websites:

> > http://www.breakingtheviciouscycle.info

> > and

> > http://www.pecanbread.com

> >

> >