Strangers and friends not understanding and judging

[Guest guest]

Hi all.

I was enjoying all the rants and thought I'd pipe in. I'm " luckier " than most

of you, because my daughter is so severely challenged by autism (and beyond the

age where people act like there's a chance she'll turn out relatively normal and

this is all in my head), so she doesn't go to church or Sunday School or

anything like that. (We've arranged private Sunday School/babysitting for her

at church in the past, but that's not the case now.)

But, when people do question me about the diet, I always have a comeback ready.

My current favorite, and proven most effective, is: " Oh, yeah, I let her cheat

on the diet. But only when the person who gave her the food has offered to

babysit her at their house for the next month, because we've learned that's how

long it takes her very painful constipation to clear up after she's eaten

something illegal. . . "

(and because I have an obnoxious personality, I usually continue)

" . . . and we just can't bear her sobbing and her hitting her head. And

sometimes we get hurt ourselves when we intervene between her fist and her head,

so it's a pretty precarious babysitting job you're signing up for. Oh, and

she's not fully independent on the toilet yet, so you'll have to accompany her

at each visit, day or night, and assist with wiping, pulling pants up, washing

hands. And there are a LOT of bathroom visits when she's constipated from

cheating, so you'll have to take time off from (work/school/choose their

activity) while you babysit her. So, there you go, those are the rules of her

cheating, but, sure, she can cheat. "

Needless to say, no friends or relatives challenge me (but most have seen

suffer), and I feel sorry for all acquaintances who won't take a simple " No,

thank you " to their " May she have one? "

Another helpful response for when people give you the line about " grains being

from the earth and certainly being meant for human consumption " or whatever line

they have that reflects their food ideology: " The Specific Carbohydrate Diet

is for damaged GI tracts. Our family's diet is for our unhealthy, inflamed

guts that make us run to the bathroom after every meal or become constipated for

2 weeks at a time. If you're just talking about how the average healthy gut

person eats, I would probably totally agree with you. But, that information has

no bearing on unhealthy nasty guts. "

And I always make sure I add, " So, this diet isn't the one you should be on.

Only people who are suffering, like my daughter and I, need to be on it. " It

seems that as soon as people realize your lifestyle choice isn't an indictment

of their lifestyle choices, they ease up and become nice again.

(If you'll notice, I use words like bathroom and constipation. I find the more

bathroom words I use, the less likely anyone wants to continue talking to me.

It's a lovely winning strategy. ;-)

Nannette, SCD 8 months, IBD

daughter, , SCD 8 months, 14yo, autism