Re: Fighting with your spouce, Looking for comments or suggestions

April 17, 2003

My wife had never had the weight problem. The surgery has put a strain on

our marriage and we are still working on recovering from it (there is a

chance it won't work out). Just like a debilitating disease puts a strain

on a relationship, recovering from a disease seems to have a similar effect.

Have others faced this situation? How have you managed it?

Palmer

> In a message dated 4/17/2003 12:35:06 AM Eastern Standard Time,

> brzezinski4@... writes:

>

>> But is seems while we do love each

>> other we have less and less in common with each other now

>

> My 2 cents, in a mature marriage, people are not necessarily glued together.

> There are married people that do everything together but many are marriages

> are between people with different interests. However, the basics are

> necessary. My spouse has so many more interests than me. No way would I be

> a part of his gun club, cigar buddies etc. He definitely hates shopping with

> the girls. Different political parties.

>

> But we are both good, kind, decent people. Our family comes first in our

> life. He loves my family and I love his. Neither of us is religious.

>

> We fight constantly about money. He thinks we still have it and tries to

> spend like we do. I know we don't.

>

> What I am saying is if you love each other and share basic values, you can

> enjoy your own interests separately.

>

> One other thing we do share is this surgery. We had the same surgeon,

> hospital room, easy recovery. Now he eats nasty stuff and sometimes I do

> butt in on his choices which cause another fight and him to go to comfort

> food.

>

> Fay Bayuk

> **300/173

> 10/23/01

> Dr.

> Open RNY 150 cm

>

April 17, 2003