Re: Just venting - 10 week post-op

September 16, 2004

Marsha

Can I vent alongside you?

I've had trouble opening since my op (upper, lower, palatal split) -

five months ago now.

I've worked up from 18mm to about 25, but still not enough. I don't

seem to have a lot of lateral movement and moving my bottom jaw

forward is sore, as well as opening as wide as I can.

I'm reluctant to carry on with tongue depressor exercises as I was

freaked out a couple of days ago to seem my bottom front teeth don't

seem to be very stable =- hence I'm scared to bite with my front

teeth, let alone lever them with a tongue depressor

I am continuing to stretch with my fingers though so I hope that is

adequate.

All the same, I have seen improvement - it is just frustrating to

still be eating relatively soft foods, having to cut things up and

struggling to eat finger foods.

Thankfully, unlike you and I do feel for you, I am not really in

pain, only when I've overstretched.

I hope you get some relief soon. It'll be interesting to see what

your doc says.

Best wishes

Sue (UK)

September 16, 2004

Marsha

Can I vent alongside you?

I've had trouble opening since my op (upper, lower, palatal split) -

five months ago now.

I've worked up from 18mm to about 25, but still not enough. I don't

seem to have a lot of lateral movement and moving my bottom jaw

forward is sore, as well as opening as wide as I can.

I'm reluctant to carry on with tongue depressor exercises as I was

freaked out a couple of days ago to seem my bottom front teeth don't

seem to be very stable =- hence I'm scared to bite with my front

teeth, let alone lever them with a tongue depressor

I am continuing to stretch with my fingers though so I hope that is

adequate.

All the same, I have seen improvement - it is just frustrating to

still be eating relatively soft foods, having to cut things up and

struggling to eat finger foods.

Thankfully, unlike you and I do feel for you, I am not really in

pain, only when I've overstretched.

I hope you get some relief soon. It'll be interesting to see what

your doc says.

Best wishes

Sue (UK)

September 16, 2004

Oh yes, that is something I forgot to include, I have no lateral

movement whatsover, when my jaw accidentally moves laterally while

eating or talking it is excrutiating!

I'm only at 2 1/2 months, not sure I can put up with this for another

2 1/2.

> Marsha

>

> Can I vent alongside you?

>

> I've had trouble opening since my op (upper, lower, palatal split) -

> five months ago now.

>

> I've worked up from 18mm to about 25, but still not enough. I

don't

> seem to have a lot of lateral movement and moving my bottom jaw

> forward is sore, as well as opening as wide as I can.

>

> I'm reluctant to carry on with tongue depressor exercises as I was

> freaked out a couple of days ago to seem my bottom front teeth

don't

> seem to be very stable =- hence I'm scared to bite with my front

> teeth, let alone lever them with a tongue depressor

>

> I am continuing to stretch with my fingers though so I hope that is

> adequate.

>

> All the same, I have seen improvement - it is just frustrating to

> still be eating relatively soft foods, having to cut things up and

> struggling to eat finger foods.

>

> Thankfully, unlike you and I do feel for you, I am not really in

> pain, only when I've overstretched.

>

> I hope you get some relief soon. It'll be interesting to see what

> your doc says.

>

> Best wishes

> Sue (UK)

September 16, 2004

Oh yes, that is something I forgot to include, I have no lateral

movement whatsover, when my jaw accidentally moves laterally while

eating or talking it is excrutiating!

I'm only at 2 1/2 months, not sure I can put up with this for another

2 1/2.

> Marsha

>

> Can I vent alongside you?

>

> I've had trouble opening since my op (upper, lower, palatal split) -

> five months ago now.

>

> I've worked up from 18mm to about 25, but still not enough. I

don't

> seem to have a lot of lateral movement and moving my bottom jaw

> forward is sore, as well as opening as wide as I can.

>

> I'm reluctant to carry on with tongue depressor exercises as I was

> freaked out a couple of days ago to seem my bottom front teeth

don't

> seem to be very stable =- hence I'm scared to bite with my front

> teeth, let alone lever them with a tongue depressor

>

> I am continuing to stretch with my fingers though so I hope that is

> adequate.

>

> All the same, I have seen improvement - it is just frustrating to

> still be eating relatively soft foods, having to cut things up and

> struggling to eat finger foods.

>

> Thankfully, unlike you and I do feel for you, I am not really in

> pain, only when I've overstretched.

>

> I hope you get some relief soon. It'll be interesting to see what

> your doc says.

>

> Best wishes

> Sue (UK)

September 17, 2004

Hi Marsha:

Yes, you will get thorough it. There is light down the road, but it

may take a full year before you see it. I had several other

complications during my ordeal, but I am coming up on 1 year and

still things are settling down to being more normal. This is just a

very long healing process to get through and I know it doesn't help

when you are in such pain and others are not sympathetic.

I had the thearpy for my jaw opeining as well and had the same

plateau, but eventually it opened back to the pre-surgical mark. I

think that took up to 4 months. Even after that it was tight and

only after getting back on a more normal diet did it loosen up.

Best of luck

Mark

> Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

sick

> of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have to

be

> driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and then

> the pain won't let me focus on driving.

>

> Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but it

is

> relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face, though

at

> $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now with

> what I have paid!

>

> I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you can

> tell I am very frustrated.

>

> To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this before),

I

> can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

has

> probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want to

I

> don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

finding

> an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

>

> I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3 classes

I

> signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

my

> degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

>

> Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> month so I can't even go cry to her.

>

> I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

be

> we have discussed several.

>

> I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had the

> surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out and

> life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

not

> much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long. But

I

> just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have a

> sympathetic ear(s) here.

>

> Thanks for listening

>

> Marsha

September 17, 2004

Hi Marsha:

Yes, you will get thorough it. There is light down the road, but it

may take a full year before you see it. I had several other

complications during my ordeal, but I am coming up on 1 year and

still things are settling down to being more normal. This is just a

very long healing process to get through and I know it doesn't help

when you are in such pain and others are not sympathetic.

I had the thearpy for my jaw opeining as well and had the same

plateau, but eventually it opened back to the pre-surgical mark. I

think that took up to 4 months. Even after that it was tight and

only after getting back on a more normal diet did it loosen up.

Best of luck

Mark

> Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

sick

> of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have to

be

> driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and then

> the pain won't let me focus on driving.

>

> Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but it

is

> relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face, though

at

> $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now with

> what I have paid!

>

> I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you can

> tell I am very frustrated.

>

> To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this before),

I

> can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

has

> probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want to

I

> don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

finding

> an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

>

> I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3 classes

I

> signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

my

> degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

>

> Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> month so I can't even go cry to her.

>

> I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

be

> we have discussed several.

>

> I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had the

> surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out and

> life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

not

> much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long. But

I

> just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have a

> sympathetic ear(s) here.

>

> Thanks for listening

>

> Marsha

September 17, 2004

Thanks Mark, after 10 weeks another 6 does not seem like much more.

> > Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

> sick

> > of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> > relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have

to

> be

> > driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and

then

> > the pain won't let me focus on driving.

> >

> > Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> > doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> > have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but

it

> is

> > relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face,

though

> at

> > $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now

with

> > what I have paid!

> >

> > I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you

can

> > tell I am very frustrated.

> >

> > To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> > unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this

before),

> I

> > can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> > casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

> has

> > probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want

to

> I

> > don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

> finding

> > an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

> >

> > I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> > that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> > contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3

classes

> I

> > signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

> my

> > degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

> >

> > Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> > month so I can't even go cry to her.

> >

> > I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

> be

> > we have discussed several.

> >

> > I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had

the

> > surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out

and

> > life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

> not

> > much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long.

But

> I

> > just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have

a

> > sympathetic ear(s) here.

> >

> > Thanks for listening

> >

> > Marsha

September 17, 2004

Thanks Mark, after 10 weeks another 6 does not seem like much more.

> > Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

> sick

> > of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> > relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have

to

> be

> > driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and

then

> > the pain won't let me focus on driving.

> >

> > Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> > doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> > have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but

it

> is

> > relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face,

though

> at

> > $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now

with

> > what I have paid!

> >

> > I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you

can

> > tell I am very frustrated.

> >

> > To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> > unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this

before),

> I

> > can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> > casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

> has

> > probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want

to

> I

> > don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

> finding

> > an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

> >

> > I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> > that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> > contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3

classes

> I

> > signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

> my

> > degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

> >

> > Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> > month so I can't even go cry to her.

> >

> > I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

> be

> > we have discussed several.

> >

> > I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had

the

> > surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out

and

> > life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

> not

> > much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long.

But

> I

> > just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have

a

> > sympathetic ear(s) here.

> >

> > Thanks for listening

> >

> > Marsha

September 17, 2004

Marsha, I'm sorry you're having such troubles. And that your feller

isn't more helpful.

But one thing about it: Better to find that out now than later! And

if you don't have to move out, wait and regain your strength. I would

think that you don't need any more stresses just now. Try to tune him

out.

And unless your surgeon or another professional has forbidden it, you

can use heat outside the spa, too. (A warm washcloth in a ziplock

bag, wrapped in a towel, if you don't have the zippy jaw wrap, for

instance.)

As for the promotion, that's a bitch, too. But if the company is a

decent one, there will be other opportunities for review. You might

want to make sure that it's noted in your personnel file that you'd

just had surgery and were having a difficult recovery at the time of

this review. (, and others who are management, is this a bad

idea?)

Cammie

> Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

sick

> of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have to

be

> driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and then

> the pain won't let me focus on driving.

>

> Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but it

is

> relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face, though

at

> $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now with

> what I have paid!

>

> I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you can

> tell I am very frustrated.

>

> To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this before),

I

> can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

has

> probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want to

I

> don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

finding

> an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

>

> I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3 classes

I

> signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

my

> degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

>

> Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> month so I can't even go cry to her.

>

> I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

be

> we have discussed several.

>

> I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had the

> surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out and

> life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

not

> much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long. But

I

> just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have a

> sympathetic ear(s) here.

>

> Thanks for listening

>

> Marsha

September 17, 2004

Marsha, I'm sorry you're having such troubles. And that your feller

isn't more helpful.

But one thing about it: Better to find that out now than later! And

if you don't have to move out, wait and regain your strength. I would

think that you don't need any more stresses just now. Try to tune him

out.

And unless your surgeon or another professional has forbidden it, you

can use heat outside the spa, too. (A warm washcloth in a ziplock

bag, wrapped in a towel, if you don't have the zippy jaw wrap, for

instance.)

As for the promotion, that's a bitch, too. But if the company is a

decent one, there will be other opportunities for review. You might

want to make sure that it's noted in your personnel file that you'd

just had surgery and were having a difficult recovery at the time of

this review. (, and others who are management, is this a bad

idea?)

Cammie

> Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

sick

> of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have to

be

> driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and then

> the pain won't let me focus on driving.

>

> Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but it

is

> relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face, though

at

> $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now with

> what I have paid!

>

> I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you can

> tell I am very frustrated.

>

> To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this before),

I

> can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

has

> probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want to

I

> don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

finding

> an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

>

> I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3 classes

I

> signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

my

> degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

>

> Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> month so I can't even go cry to her.

>

> I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

be

> we have discussed several.

>

> I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had the

> surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out and

> life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

not

> much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long. But

I

> just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have a

> sympathetic ear(s) here.

>

> Thanks for listening

>

> Marsha

September 17, 2004

Cammie, I'm not an HR specialist, so I can't advise what should or

should not go in a person's file. I feel that this sort of thing

doesn't belong there as it's personal medical information.

Marsha, it's so hard to come to the other side of all of this and not

get the results that so many of us have, but hang in there. Cammie's

right, it's not the time to make rash moves. If you're decided on

leaving your boyfriend, take your time and do it carefully.

As for your job, I would talk to your manager, or HR, or even another

more senior manager depending on how far you want to push it) and

express your disappointment at not being considered for promotion. I

wouldn't mention your present problems, though, just that you hope

there will be another opportunity for you soon. That usually does

send a clear message to management. I would also ask them to tell you

what you can do to help your advancement, whether it just needs more

time or some additional training, etc. Our company internal auditors

this year asked what we as managers were doing to ensure that our

associates were given opportunities for growth and experience (short

of allowing them to take on our jobs), so it's considered important

in some larger companies.

> > Well here I am 10 weeks post-op, I can barely chew, I'm getting

> sick

> > of fish and pasta. I am taking 4 to 5 pain pills a day and muscle

> > relaxers to sleep. Of course this means I cannot drive and have

to

> be

> > driven everywhere or not take the pills if I have to drive and

then

> > the pain won't let me focus on driving.

> >

> > Through exercise and doing everything I've been instructed by my

> > doctores I have increased my opening from 12 to 22 MM and seem to

> > have plateaud there. The physical therapy doesn't help much but

it

> is

> > relaxing to have the heat and them someone massage my face,

though

> at

> > $20 copay a visit I could have gone to a spa for a week by now

with

> > what I have paid!

> >

> > I still have swelling, I can't start back to the ortho. As you

can

> > tell I am very frustrated.

> >

> > To top it off I have a long-time live in boyfriend who is pretty

> > unsupportive and indifferent ( I think I've mentioned this

before),

> I

> > can be sitting and crying from pain for 10 minutes and he will

> > casually look over and say " does it hurt? " . This whole situation

> has

> > probably been the boost I need to move out, but now that I want

to

> I

> > don't think I am physically or emotionally able to deal with

> finding

> > an apartment and moving. Just thinking about it exhausts me.

> >

> > I also found out yesterday that I was passed over for a promotion

> > that I really wanted, I'm sure this problem I am going through

> > contributed to that decision. I've had to drop one of the 3

classes

> I

> > signed up for this semester so that means I will probably not get

> my

> > degree in May and start grad school as I planned.

> >

> > Oh! and my mother went to burg VA to visit my Aunt for a

> > month so I can't even go cry to her.

> >

> > I see my Dr. again next week I'm not sure what the next step will

> be

> > we have discussed several.

> >

> > I don't want you all to think I am on the edge. I am glad I had

the

> > surgery. I will deal with this and get through it and move out

and

> > life will go on. I have been through other tough times, there is

> not

> > much that life can throw at me that will keep me down for long.

But

> I

> > just need to get it all out and off of my chest and I know I have

a

> > sympathetic ear(s) here.

> >

> > Thanks for listening

> >

> > Marsha

September 17, 2004