Re: Confession and Absolution

[Guest guest]

If I was hurting, I would have slunk away at your post. But, it may also have

stirred me up enough to get out of my funk and let you know what I thought.

What is done is done, we of course understand, now forgive yourself.

Fay

[Guest guest]

If I was hurting, I would have slunk away at your post. But, it may also have

stirred me up enough to get out of my funk and let you know what I thought.

What is done is done, we of course understand, now forgive yourself.

Fay

[Guest guest]

Kate:

I totally understand what you're talking about. I think it's wonderful that you

do so much. I'm sure you have helped many people change their lives.

I am also wondering if you use pre-written notes (canned). I have saved a few

of my replies, and when I get a similar question, I just pull it up and make a

few changes. I can still make it individual and personal, I just don't have to

create the wheel every time I make a reply.

I definately forgive you, and hope you forgive yourself. You can't be perfect

all the time. And who knows? Maybe that was just the answer that person

needed.

Hugs

BarbaraJean

distal

from 300 to 128

Confession and Absolution

It must be good to be Catholic sometimes. I did a mean thing, well not a

mean thing, but a not so nice thing and am feeling guilty. I get a lot of

email from prospective gastric bypass patients. 4-5 times a week I get

emails out of the blue from strangers wanting to know what it's like, how it

went, would I do it again, etc. etc. I answer at length, pros and cons,

offer to help.

The other day I received an email from a total stranger which said:

" I am 246 lbs. I want surgery. I am scared to death. I don't want to die

an untimely death. I am diabetic. I am scared. "

That's all it said. For some reason, it just hit me the wrong way and I

replied:

" Not really sure what you want me to do. I had surgery. My husband had

surgery. Neither of us are dead. Do you have a specific question or concern?

"

My family tell me this is unspeakably mean, and now I am feeling quite

guilty! Do y'all still love me?

Kate

[Guest guest]

Kate:

I totally understand what you're talking about. I think it's wonderful that you

do so much. I'm sure you have helped many people change their lives.

I am also wondering if you use pre-written notes (canned). I have saved a few

of my replies, and when I get a similar question, I just pull it up and make a

few changes. I can still make it individual and personal, I just don't have to

create the wheel every time I make a reply.

I definately forgive you, and hope you forgive yourself. You can't be perfect

all the time. And who knows? Maybe that was just the answer that person

needed.

Hugs

BarbaraJean

distal

from 300 to 128

Confession and Absolution

It must be good to be Catholic sometimes. I did a mean thing, well not a

mean thing, but a not so nice thing and am feeling guilty. I get a lot of

email from prospective gastric bypass patients. 4-5 times a week I get

emails out of the blue from strangers wanting to know what it's like, how it

went, would I do it again, etc. etc. I answer at length, pros and cons,

offer to help.

The other day I received an email from a total stranger which said:

" I am 246 lbs. I want surgery. I am scared to death. I don't want to die

an untimely death. I am diabetic. I am scared. "

That's all it said. For some reason, it just hit me the wrong way and I

replied:

" Not really sure what you want me to do. I had surgery. My husband had

surgery. Neither of us are dead. Do you have a specific question or concern?

"

My family tell me this is unspeakably mean, and now I am feeling quite

guilty! Do y'all still love me?

Kate

[Guest guest]

Thanks guys. I feel better now. Done beating myself up about not being as

gracious as I could be, and moving on to beating myself up about being a food

addict. More on that later <g> - once I'm back in control that is, as

opposed to food being in control!!

Kate

[Guest guest]

Thanks guys. I feel better now. Done beating myself up about not being as

gracious as I could be, and moving on to beating myself up about being a food

addict. More on that later <g> - once I'm back in control that is, as

opposed to food being in control!!

Kate

[Guest guest]

Kate,

I have the same thing happen once or twice a month. I start

getting emails from someone and its like " who are you? " There have been

a few that I have responded to rather harshly especially if there was no

signature. I basically ask who are you and what exactly are you needing

from me. Sometimes I get a response. Other times I don't. The thing is

that I almost always get an uneasy feeling. The first thing that pops

into this suspicious mind of mine is " Are you a report and what the heck

do you want with me. " I don't think you did anything wrong. I have to

trust my instincts sometimes. I spent most of my life not trusting my

instincts and regretting it.

Now, for those that do sign their emails and I am still not real

sure I will send an email answering their question and then stating that

I recognize the name/email just can't place what list I know them from.

This often promotes more open communication.

Lori Owen - Denton, Texas

CHF 4/14/01 479 lbs.

SRVG 7/16/01 401 lbs.

Current Weight 335

Dr. Ritter/Dr. Bryce

On Wed, 26 Mar 2003 09:52:52 EST kateseidel@... writes:

> It must be good to be Catholic sometimes. I did a mean thing, well

> not a

> mean thing, but a not so nice thing and am feeling guilty. I get a

> lot of

> email from prospective gastric bypass patients. 4-5 times a week I

> get

> emails out of the blue from strangers wanting to know what it's

> like, how it

> went, would I do it again, etc. etc. I answer at length, pros and

> cons,

> offer to help.

>

> The other day I received an email from a total stranger which said:

>

> " I am 246 lbs. I want surgery. I am scared to death. I don't want

> to die

> an untimely death. I am diabetic. I am scared. "

>

> That's all it said. For some reason, it just hit me the wrong way

> and I

> replied:

>

> " Not really sure what you want me to do. I had surgery. My husband

> had

> surgery. Neither of us are dead. Do you have a specific question

> or concern?

> "

>

> My family tell me this is unspeakably mean, and now I am feeling

> quite

> guilty! Do y'all still love me?

>

> Kate

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kate,

I have the same thing happen once or twice a month. I start

getting emails from someone and its like " who are you? " There have been

a few that I have responded to rather harshly especially if there was no

signature. I basically ask who are you and what exactly are you needing

from me. Sometimes I get a response. Other times I don't. The thing is

that I almost always get an uneasy feeling. The first thing that pops

into this suspicious mind of mine is " Are you a report and what the heck

do you want with me. " I don't think you did anything wrong. I have to

trust my instincts sometimes. I spent most of my life not trusting my

instincts and regretting it.

Now, for those that do sign their emails and I am still not real

sure I will send an email answering their question and then stating that

I recognize the name/email just can't place what list I know them from.

This often promotes more open communication.

Lori Owen - Denton, Texas

CHF 4/14/01 479 lbs.

SRVG 7/16/01 401 lbs.

Current Weight 335

Dr. Ritter/Dr. Bryce

On Wed, 26 Mar 2003 09:52:52 EST kateseidel@... writes:

> It must be good to be Catholic sometimes. I did a mean thing, well

> not a

> mean thing, but a not so nice thing and am feeling guilty. I get a

> lot of

> email from prospective gastric bypass patients. 4-5 times a week I

> get

> emails out of the blue from strangers wanting to know what it's

> like, how it

> went, would I do it again, etc. etc. I answer at length, pros and

> cons,

> offer to help.

>

> The other day I received an email from a total stranger which said:

>

> " I am 246 lbs. I want surgery. I am scared to death. I don't want

> to die

> an untimely death. I am diabetic. I am scared. "

>

> That's all it said. For some reason, it just hit me the wrong way

> and I

> replied:

>

> " Not really sure what you want me to do. I had surgery. My husband

> had

> surgery. Neither of us are dead. Do you have a specific question

> or concern?

> "

>

> My family tell me this is unspeakably mean, and now I am feeling

> quite

> guilty! Do y'all still love me?

>

> Kate

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kate,

I got to a point where I was getting way too many of these emails & phone

calls about people wanting my " story " and my advice (my surgeon & another

surgeon in Rochester would give out my name on a list of people to call

about the surgery). I wanted to help, but it was beginning to take a

significant amount of time out of my days and I run a business and have a

husband and three kids 6 years old and under and don't have much free time.

I called the surgeons and asked that only my email address be given out, not

my phone number, this way I could answer questions when it was more

convenient for me. I also came up with a sort of " form letter " that I'd use

as a base for my responses. It had my " story " and some other info about the

surgery that I had. I would use it as a base and customize it to the

specific person who wrote with answers to their questions and stuff. Made

things a lot easier for me. Before I did this though, there were many times

that I got fed up with the phone calls and emails. I can certainly

understand where your response came from. Was it " mean " , as your family

says? Maybe. We all have moments that we're not proud of though, and it's

easy to get fed up with intrusions sometimes, no matter how well meaning and

helpful we usually try to be.

Don't beat yourself up about it. It's done. You're a good person who (like

everyone else) had a bad moment.

------------------------------------------------

Terry Mayers

5DollarHosting.com®

http://www.5dollarhosting.com

(877)-838-HOST /

.... because it shouldn't cost a fortune to make a fortune! ®

Confession and Absolution

It must be good to be Catholic sometimes. I did a mean thing, well not a

mean thing, but a not so nice thing and am feeling guilty. I get a lot of

email from prospective gastric bypass patients. 4-5 times a week I get

emails out of the blue from strangers wanting to know what it's like, how it

went, would I do it again, etc. etc. I answer at length, pros and cons,

offer to help.

The other day I received an email from a total stranger which said:

" I am 246 lbs. I want surgery. I am scared to death. I don't want to die

an untimely death. I am diabetic. I am scared. "

That's all it said. For some reason, it just hit me the wrong way and I

replied:

" Not really sure what you want me to do.  I had surgery.  My husband had

surgery.  Neither of us are dead.  Do you have a specific question or

concern?

"

My family tell me this is unspeakably mean, and now I am feeling quite

guilty! Do y'all still love me?

Kate

[Guest guest]

Kate,

I got to a point where I was getting way too many of these emails & phone

calls about people wanting my " story " and my advice (my surgeon & another

surgeon in Rochester would give out my name on a list of people to call

about the surgery). I wanted to help, but it was beginning to take a

significant amount of time out of my days and I run a business and have a

husband and three kids 6 years old and under and don't have much free time.

I called the surgeons and asked that only my email address be given out, not

my phone number, this way I could answer questions when it was more

convenient for me. I also came up with a sort of " form letter " that I'd use

as a base for my responses. It had my " story " and some other info about the

surgery that I had. I would use it as a base and customize it to the

specific person who wrote with answers to their questions and stuff. Made

things a lot easier for me. Before I did this though, there were many times

that I got fed up with the phone calls and emails. I can certainly

understand where your response came from. Was it " mean " , as your family

says? Maybe. We all have moments that we're not proud of though, and it's

easy to get fed up with intrusions sometimes, no matter how well meaning and

helpful we usually try to be.

Don't beat yourself up about it. It's done. You're a good person who (like

everyone else) had a bad moment.

------------------------------------------------

Terry Mayers

5DollarHosting.com®

http://www.5dollarhosting.com

(877)-838-HOST /

.... because it shouldn't cost a fortune to make a fortune! ®

Confession and Absolution

It must be good to be Catholic sometimes. I did a mean thing, well not a

mean thing, but a not so nice thing and am feeling guilty. I get a lot of

email from prospective gastric bypass patients. 4-5 times a week I get

emails out of the blue from strangers wanting to know what it's like, how it

went, would I do it again, etc. etc. I answer at length, pros and cons,

offer to help.

The other day I received an email from a total stranger which said:

" I am 246 lbs. I want surgery. I am scared to death. I don't want to die

an untimely death. I am diabetic. I am scared. "

That's all it said. For some reason, it just hit me the wrong way and I

replied:

" Not really sure what you want me to do.  I had surgery.  My husband had

surgery.  Neither of us are dead.  Do you have a specific question or

concern?

"

My family tell me this is unspeakably mean, and now I am feeling quite

guilty! Do y'all still love me?

Kate

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/26/2003 10:38:34 PM Eastern Standard Time,

kateseidel@... writes:

> More on that later <g> - once I'm back in control that is, as

> opposed to food being in control!!

>

No, No, No, not later, now. We talk when we are out of control in order to

help ourselves get in control.

Much love Fay

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/26/2003 10:38:34 PM Eastern Standard Time,

kateseidel@... writes:

> More on that later <g> - once I'm back in control that is, as

> opposed to food being in control!!

>

No, No, No, not later, now. We talk when we are out of control in order to

help ourselves get in control.

Much love Fay