The house that God built

October 22, 2002

Dear ,

Sometimes the parallels between your life and our lives are scary! Jeff

and I were married in February 1998. His wedding present to me was a house

(2500 sq ft) that he designed and helped build. He laid over 900 sq ft of

ceramic in the kitchen/dining, utility and bath areas. We moved in August

1998. A few months after the house was completed, he took the covered

porch and enclosed it, and turned it in to a game room for the kids. We

lived in the country on an acre and a half of land. Jeff was so proud of

" his " accomplishment. In January 1999 Jeff started to have symptoms

ranging from stomach disorders, disorientation, pain in the middle of the

back, lightheadedness, stumbling. They would come and go, and the doctors

were perplexed, to say the least. MSA was mentioned as far back as

christmas 2000. He was hospitalized 4 times between Jan 2000 and July

2001. A trip to Mayo in Rochester in July 2001 ruled out internal diseases

(cancer,etc,), and it took a while for the doctors to determine for sure

that the condition was neurological in nature. Finally a diagnosis of

probable MSA was made by Dr Jankovic in Houston Christmas of 2001.

Due to Jeff's health problems, the mounting medical bills and our home's

distance from the nearest medical facility, we put our house up for sale in

December 2000 and sold it March 2001. I was very sad to move, but it

really broke Jeff's heart. He had put so much of his love in to that

house. We moved in to a 3 bedroom apartment, exactly half the size of the

house. And a very amazing thing began to happen. Jeff, who grew up

thinking that " things " made the man, began to realize that things aren't so

important after all. We really have grown to love our home. It's a happy

haven where Jeff can come and rest if he's tired (it's only a few minutes

from work). He doesn't have to worry about a yard to upkeep, or

maintenance. When life becomes a daily struggle just to get out of bed,

appearances and material things just don't mean much.

On Sunday, I came in the living room and Jeff was sitting on the couch

sobbing. He made the mistake of watching the movie " Ghost " . It really

tore him up inside, and for the first time he had what I would call a " Job "

moment, where he cried out to God and asked him WHY was this happening?

Why was he being punished? He was a good man, he loved God, he loved his

family, etc. It gave me a chance to remind him that God does not only

afflict bad people but good ones as well. It gave me a chance to tell Jeff

that his affliction and his courage in dealing with it has touched

countless lives. He goes to work every day, and every day people ask him

" How do you do it? " That's making an impact. His physical therapist wants

to start a foundation. Who knows where that will lead? I told him that

his children watch him and how he deals with this adversity, and who knows

how that is going to mold their future? I know I will never be the same,

or look at life the same as I did three years ago. I told him that when he

goes heaven there will be no more tears or sorrow or pain. It won't be him

that misses his family. In the accounting of eternity, we will be with him

in the blink of an eye. It's the ones left behind who will do the missing.

I think when he realized that he was not being punished, he felt alot more

at peace with himself and God. So you see, God is still working, he's

still building our house.

Hang in there, Pablito.

October 22, 2002