Guest guest Posted March 9, 2003 Report Share Posted March 9, 2003 Yes. unsettling. Good way to put it. I want to run up and say, " It doesn't have to BE like this! " . But I can't do it, either. I've never, ever found the words to introduce the subject. However, if there is ANY way to work it into the conversation, consider it DONE! Thanks, Vitalady, Inc. T www.vitalady.com If you are interested in PayPal, please click here: https://www.paypal.com/affil/pal=orders%40vitalady.com Kinda Mad and > I just wanted to weight in on this kinda! hahahaha > > Really. > > I had the same feeling as both of you and I find it odd. > At first I would just get pissed that so and so just loved me now, when 12 > months ago I was not fit to be spoken to. > I really had to work on that and I had to work on receiving a complement too. > Person " A " would say to me " Oh Merilee you look so great, you must feel so > wonderful! " . > I would smile and say " Yes, I do. " End.... > In my mind what I heard was you " fat pig you finally lost weight " and on and > on.... Really weird, I know. But very true. Now here is the really > weird part, internally I've started judging fat people and looking at them > like I was looked at. Now I don't hate them or anything like that. I just > know that my mind has shifted and I find it very unsettling. I'm going to > let it at that, cause I can't explain myself. > Meri > Oregon > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 9, 2003 Report Share Posted March 9, 2003 Yes. unsettling. Good way to put it. I want to run up and say, " It doesn't have to BE like this! " . But I can't do it, either. I've never, ever found the words to introduce the subject. However, if there is ANY way to work it into the conversation, consider it DONE! Thanks, Vitalady, Inc. T www.vitalady.com If you are interested in PayPal, please click here: https://www.paypal.com/affil/pal=orders%40vitalady.com Kinda Mad and > I just wanted to weight in on this kinda! hahahaha > > Really. > > I had the same feeling as both of you and I find it odd. > At first I would just get pissed that so and so just loved me now, when 12 > months ago I was not fit to be spoken to. > I really had to work on that and I had to work on receiving a complement too. > Person " A " would say to me " Oh Merilee you look so great, you must feel so > wonderful! " . > I would smile and say " Yes, I do. " End.... > In my mind what I heard was you " fat pig you finally lost weight " and on and > on.... Really weird, I know. But very true. Now here is the really > weird part, internally I've started judging fat people and looking at them > like I was looked at. Now I don't hate them or anything like that. I just > know that my mind has shifted and I find it very unsettling. I'm going to > let it at that, cause I can't explain myself. > Meri > Oregon > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2003 Report Share Posted March 10, 2003 Meri: It's interesting, because I was just trying to say I'm sure that there were different reasons people avoided me before I lost weight. I bet that some people are more superficial and just like thinner people. But I realized that the shift was happening with people I really couldn't imagine being quite that shallow, and I figured out that it makes me uncomfortable as well when I see people in physical distress. Not disliking them, not judging them for being in distress, just kinda of scared like when you see someone who is hurt for the first time or something. Uncomfortable that something bad may occur. As far as the nasty, " why don't you do something about yourself, why are you eating that xxx, you're so big " kind of judging, I ironically found I did that much more when I was obese myself. Go figure. I don't know if it was because I was just younger and stupid, I was projecting, or if it was part of that " you'll be obese forever, but mine's temporary because once again I'm starting the perfect diet this coming Monday. " I know now my success is pure grace, luck or good fortune, whatever you want to call it. The only part I'm responsible for is the research, insurance push and guts to actually not run from the hospital in fear. The rest is a blessing. I just try to accept this change, which I fully realize could turnaround in a moment's notice. I decided to take the change in people's attitudes as a gift as well. Obese people get judged, feel bad, and yet I still maintain, make some otherwise decent people uncomfortable because of the physical struggles, like breathing and moving. It's not an easy life. Just my $.02 in Austin RNY April 1998 Kinda Mad and > I just wanted to weight in on this kinda! hahahaha > > Really. > > I had the same feeling as both of you and I find it odd. > At first I would just get pissed that so and so just loved me now, when 12 > months ago I was not fit to be spoken to. > I really had to work on that and I had to work on receiving a complement too. > Person " A " would say to me " Oh Merilee you look so great, you must feel so > wonderful! " . > I would smile and say " Yes, I do. " End.... > In my mind what I heard was you " fat pig you finally lost weight " and on and > on.... Really weird, I know. But very true. Now here is the really > weird part, internally I've started judging fat people and looking at them > like I was looked at. Now I don't hate them or anything like that. I just > know that my mind has shifted and I find it very unsettling. I'm going to > let it at that, cause I can't explain myself. > Meri > Oregon > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2003 Report Share Posted March 10, 2003 Meri: It's interesting, because I was just trying to say I'm sure that there were different reasons people avoided me before I lost weight. I bet that some people are more superficial and just like thinner people. But I realized that the shift was happening with people I really couldn't imagine being quite that shallow, and I figured out that it makes me uncomfortable as well when I see people in physical distress. Not disliking them, not judging them for being in distress, just kinda of scared like when you see someone who is hurt for the first time or something. Uncomfortable that something bad may occur. As far as the nasty, " why don't you do something about yourself, why are you eating that xxx, you're so big " kind of judging, I ironically found I did that much more when I was obese myself. Go figure. I don't know if it was because I was just younger and stupid, I was projecting, or if it was part of that " you'll be obese forever, but mine's temporary because once again I'm starting the perfect diet this coming Monday. " I know now my success is pure grace, luck or good fortune, whatever you want to call it. The only part I'm responsible for is the research, insurance push and guts to actually not run from the hospital in fear. The rest is a blessing. I just try to accept this change, which I fully realize could turnaround in a moment's notice. I decided to take the change in people's attitudes as a gift as well. Obese people get judged, feel bad, and yet I still maintain, make some otherwise decent people uncomfortable because of the physical struggles, like breathing and moving. It's not an easy life. Just my $.02 in Austin RNY April 1998 Kinda Mad and > I just wanted to weight in on this kinda! hahahaha > > Really. > > I had the same feeling as both of you and I find it odd. > At first I would just get pissed that so and so just loved me now, when 12 > months ago I was not fit to be spoken to. > I really had to work on that and I had to work on receiving a complement too. > Person " A " would say to me " Oh Merilee you look so great, you must feel so > wonderful! " . > I would smile and say " Yes, I do. " End.... > In my mind what I heard was you " fat pig you finally lost weight " and on and > on.... Really weird, I know. But very true. Now here is the really > weird part, internally I've started judging fat people and looking at them > like I was looked at. Now I don't hate them or anything like that. I just > know that my mind has shifted and I find it very unsettling. I'm going to > let it at that, cause I can't explain myself. > Meri > Oregon > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2003 Report Share Posted March 10, 2003 , this sounds more like you. I gues I misread you. Now I'll will know better if I read a post from you. I will assume I am misunderstanding you. Fay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2003 Report Share Posted March 10, 2003 , this sounds more like you. I gues I misread you. Now I'll will know better if I read a post from you. I will assume I am misunderstanding you. Fay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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