New Math (injuneer's humor)

[Guest guest]

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter:

Eskimo Pi

2000 pounds of Chinese soup:

Won ton

1 millionth of a mouthwash:

1 microscope

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:

1 bananosecond

Weight an evangelist carries with God:

1 billigram

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:

Knot-furlong

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling:

1 lite year

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone:

1 Rod Serling

Half of a large intestine:

1 semicolon

1000 pains

1 kilohurtz

Basic unit of laryngitis:

1 hoarsepower

Shortest distance between two jokes:

A straight line

454 graham crackers:

1 pound cake

1 million microphones:

1 megaphone

1 million bicycles:

2 megacycles

2000 mockingbirds:

two kilomockingbirds

10 cards:

1 decacards

1 kilogram of falling figs:

1 Fig Newton

1000 milliliters of wet socks:

1 literhosen

1 millionth of a fish:

1 microfiche

1 trillion pins:

1 terrapin

10 rations:

1 decoration

100 rations:

1 C-ration

2 monograms:

1 diagram

8 nickels:

2 paradigms

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University

Hospital:

1 IV. League

Take care, Bill

[Guest guest]

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter:

Eskimo Pi

2000 pounds of Chinese soup:

Won ton

1 millionth of a mouthwash:

1 microscope

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:

1 bananosecond

Weight an evangelist carries with God:

1 billigram

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour:

Knot-furlong

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling:

1 lite year

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone:

1 Rod Serling

Half of a large intestine:

1 semicolon

1000 pains

1 kilohurtz

Basic unit of laryngitis:

1 hoarsepower

Shortest distance between two jokes:

A straight line

454 graham crackers:

1 pound cake

1 million microphones:

1 megaphone

1 million bicycles:

2 megacycles

2000 mockingbirds:

two kilomockingbirds

10 cards:

1 decacards

1 kilogram of falling figs:

1 Fig Newton

1000 milliliters of wet socks:

1 literhosen

1 millionth of a fish:

1 microfiche

1 trillion pins:

1 terrapin

10 rations:

1 decoration

100 rations:

1 C-ration

2 monograms:

1 diagram

8 nickels:

2 paradigms

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University

Hospital:

1 IV. League

Take care, Bill