Guest guest Posted August 31, 2001 Report Share Posted August 31, 2001 > > > > Things My Mother Taught Me > > > > > > My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION... > > > 'Just wait until your father gets home.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me to APPRECIATE A JOB WELL > > > DONE.... > > > 'If you're going to kill each other, do it > > > outside...I just finished cleaning the house!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about RECEIVING.... > > > 'You are going to get it when we get home!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE... > > > 'What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to > > > you ... Don't talk back to me!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me LOGIC... > > > 'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, > > > you're not going to the store with me.' > > > > > > My Moher taught me REASONING... > > > 'Because I said so, that's why.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me RELIGION.... > > > 'You better pray that will come out of the carpet!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE... > > > 'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are > > > going to freeze that way.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about the SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS... > > > 'Shut your mouth and eat your supper!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL... > > > 'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you > > > into the middle of next week!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD... > > > 'If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never > > > get a good job.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me FORESIGHT.... > > > 'Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're > > > in an accident!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me ESP... > > > 'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when > > > you're cold?' > > > > > > My Mother taught me HUMOR... > > > 'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come > > > running to me.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me IRONY.... > > > 'You keep laughing like a hyena & I'll give you > > > something to cry about!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT... > > > 'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow > > > up.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about SEX.... > > > 'How do you think you got here?' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about GENETICS... > > > 'You're just like your father.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about my ROOTS... > > > 'Do you think you were born in a barn?' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE... > > > 'When you get to be my age, you will understand. > > > > > > And my all time favorite... JUSTICE... > > > 'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out > > > just like you....Then you'll see what it's like.' > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 31, 2001 Report Share Posted August 31, 2001 > > > > Things My Mother Taught Me > > > > > > My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION... > > > 'Just wait until your father gets home.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me to APPRECIATE A JOB WELL > > > DONE.... > > > 'If you're going to kill each other, do it > > > outside...I just finished cleaning the house!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about RECEIVING.... > > > 'You are going to get it when we get home!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE... > > > 'What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to > > > you ... Don't talk back to me!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me LOGIC... > > > 'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, > > > you're not going to the store with me.' > > > > > > My Moher taught me REASONING... > > > 'Because I said so, that's why.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me RELIGION.... > > > 'You better pray that will come out of the carpet!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE... > > > 'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are > > > going to freeze that way.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about the SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS... > > > 'Shut your mouth and eat your supper!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL... > > > 'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you > > > into the middle of next week!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD... > > > 'If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never > > > get a good job.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me FORESIGHT.... > > > 'Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're > > > in an accident!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me ESP... > > > 'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when > > > you're cold?' > > > > > > My Mother taught me HUMOR... > > > 'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come > > > running to me.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me IRONY.... > > > 'You keep laughing like a hyena & I'll give you > > > something to cry about!' > > > > > > My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT... > > > 'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow > > > up.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about SEX.... > > > 'How do you think you got here?' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about GENETICS... > > > 'You're just like your father.' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about my ROOTS... > > > 'Do you think you were born in a barn?' > > > > > > My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE... > > > 'When you get to be my age, you will understand. > > > > > > And my all time favorite... JUSTICE... > > > 'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out > > > just like you....Then you'll see what it's like.' > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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