Women Warriors.

[Guest guest]

I think this might work;-)

)

American Women at War

Take all American women who are within five years of menopause. Train

us for a few weeks, outfit us

with automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks, moisturizer with SPF15,

Prozac, hormones,

chocolate, and canned tuna. Drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the

landscape of Afghanistan,

and let us do what comes naturally.

Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when doing standard stuff

like grocery shopping and

paying bills, is formidable enough to make even armed men in turbans

tremble.

We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die to protect them

and their future. We'd like to get

away from our husbands, if they haven't left already. And for those of

us who are single, the prospect

of finding a good man with whom to share life is about as likely as

being struck by lightning. We have

nothing to lose.

We've survived the water diet, the protein diet, the carbohydrate diet,

and the grapefruit diet in gyms

and saunas across America and never lost a pound. We can easily survive

months in the hostile

terrain of Afghanistan with no food at all!

We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers in bars, hardware

stores, or sporting

events...finding bin Laden in some cave will be a piece of cake.

Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new government? Oh,

please ... we've planned the

seating arrangements for in-laws and extended families at Thanksgiving

dinners for years ... we

understand tribal warfare.

Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know every trick there is

for how they hide, launder,

or cover up bank accounts and money sources. We know how to find that

money and we know how

to seize it ... with or without the government's help!

Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine their terror as we

crawl like ants with

hot-flashes over their godforsaken terrain.

[Guest guest]

I think this might work;-)

)

American Women at War

Take all American women who are within five years of menopause. Train

us for a few weeks, outfit us

with automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks, moisturizer with SPF15,

Prozac, hormones,

chocolate, and canned tuna. Drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the

landscape of Afghanistan,

and let us do what comes naturally.

Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when doing standard stuff

like grocery shopping and

paying bills, is formidable enough to make even armed men in turbans

tremble.

We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die to protect them

and their future. We'd like to get

away from our husbands, if they haven't left already. And for those of

us who are single, the prospect

of finding a good man with whom to share life is about as likely as

being struck by lightning. We have

nothing to lose.

We've survived the water diet, the protein diet, the carbohydrate diet,

and the grapefruit diet in gyms

and saunas across America and never lost a pound. We can easily survive

months in the hostile

terrain of Afghanistan with no food at all!

We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers in bars, hardware

stores, or sporting

events...finding bin Laden in some cave will be a piece of cake.

Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new government? Oh,

please ... we've planned the

seating arrangements for in-laws and extended families at Thanksgiving

dinners for years ... we

understand tribal warfare.

Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know every trick there is

for how they hide, launder,

or cover up bank accounts and money sources. We know how to find that

money and we know how

to seize it ... with or without the government's help!

Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine their terror as we

crawl like ants with

hot-flashes over their godforsaken terrain.