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btw, I am new to this list, joined about a week before started giving

us her post-op messages. I never once said anything derogatory about

ror anyone who made neagtive comments to her. It upsets me greatly to be put

down by (when I didn't put her down) and Nick in Sage for no reason.

Is this the way you treat newcomers? I was here when the old group all left

due to the bickering and I can understand now.

I joined this list for information. I do not mean that I don't want the

whole story and just the " nice " stuff. But I hate bickering and name calling

and put downs towards anyone and since that is what my original post was

meant to convey, it amazes me that I was then made the subject of put downs.

Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other lists and they

seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from the list

who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I know this.

No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an informational post in

case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who really want

information will just move on by then. Carole

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btw, I am new to this list, joined about a week before started giving

us her post-op messages. I never once said anything derogatory about

ror anyone who made neagtive comments to her. It upsets me greatly to be put

down by (when I didn't put her down) and Nick in Sage for no reason.

Is this the way you treat newcomers? I was here when the old group all left

due to the bickering and I can understand now.

I joined this list for information. I do not mean that I don't want the

whole story and just the " nice " stuff. But I hate bickering and name calling

and put downs towards anyone and since that is what my original post was

meant to convey, it amazes me that I was then made the subject of put downs.

Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other lists and they

seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from the list

who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I know this.

No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an informational post in

case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who really want

information will just move on by then. Carole

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Hi Carol -

Let me clear something up for you. We left this group to avoid the

mentality you have just expressed. You have basically said that

anyone who is " disruptive " -- read intense, emotional, diverse,

expresses something in a way I don't like -- can be shut out.

Ironically, because the other group is based upon open and free

communication, people accept others and we all get along very, very

well. In this group, people are constantly criticized for talking

about things in a way someone doesn't like. Rather than reach out to

that person and recognize their frustration and pain, they jump all

over them for the way in which they express themselves. The

substance of their posts is ignored. At that point people become

increasingly frustrated and their posts become still more strident.

The circle continues.

My posts have not been directed at you, rather they are aimed at the

multitude of people here who don't want to read anything other than

information that has been Pablumized for their tastes.

Best --

Nick in Sage

> btw, I am new to this list, joined about a week before

started giving

> us her post-op messages. I never once said anything derogatory

about

> ror anyone who made neagtive comments to her. It upsets me greatly

to be put

> down by (when I didn't put her down) and Nick in Sage for no

reason.

> Is this the way you treat newcomers? I was here when the old group

all left

> due to the bickering and I can understand now.

> I joined this list for information. I do not mean that I don't

want the

> whole story and just the " nice " stuff. But I hate bickering and

name calling

> and put downs towards anyone and since that is what my original

post was

> meant to convey, it amazes me that I was then made the subject of

put downs.

> Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other

lists and they

> seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

> Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from

the list

> who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I

know this.

> No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an

informational post in

> case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who

really want

> information will just move on by then. Carole

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Guest guest

Hi Carol -

Let me clear something up for you. We left this group to avoid the

mentality you have just expressed. You have basically said that

anyone who is " disruptive " -- read intense, emotional, diverse,

expresses something in a way I don't like -- can be shut out.

Ironically, because the other group is based upon open and free

communication, people accept others and we all get along very, very

well. In this group, people are constantly criticized for talking

about things in a way someone doesn't like. Rather than reach out to

that person and recognize their frustration and pain, they jump all

over them for the way in which they express themselves. The

substance of their posts is ignored. At that point people become

increasingly frustrated and their posts become still more strident.

The circle continues.

My posts have not been directed at you, rather they are aimed at the

multitude of people here who don't want to read anything other than

information that has been Pablumized for their tastes.

Best --

Nick in Sage

> btw, I am new to this list, joined about a week before

started giving

> us her post-op messages. I never once said anything derogatory

about

> ror anyone who made neagtive comments to her. It upsets me greatly

to be put

> down by (when I didn't put her down) and Nick in Sage for no

reason.

> Is this the way you treat newcomers? I was here when the old group

all left

> due to the bickering and I can understand now.

> I joined this list for information. I do not mean that I don't

want the

> whole story and just the " nice " stuff. But I hate bickering and

name calling

> and put downs towards anyone and since that is what my original

post was

> meant to convey, it amazes me that I was then made the subject of

put downs.

> Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other

lists and they

> seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

> Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from

the list

> who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I

know this.

> No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an

informational post in

> case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who

really want

> information will just move on by then. Carole

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Dear Carole,

What other lists do you belong to re: DS surgery that you like? I'd like to

join. I, too, begin to weary with some of what goes on here. . .

Thanks,

Robyn

btw

> btw, I am new to this list, joined about a week before started

giving

> us her post-op messages. I never once said anything derogatory about

> ror anyone who made neagtive comments to her. It upsets me greatly to be

put

> down by (when I didn't put her down) and Nick in Sage for no reason.

> Is this the way you treat newcomers? I was here when the old group all

left

> due to the bickering and I can understand now.

> I joined this list for information. I do not mean that I don't want the

> whole story and just the " nice " stuff. But I hate bickering and name

calling

> and put downs towards anyone and since that is what my original post was

> meant to convey, it amazes me that I was then made the subject of put

downs.

> Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other lists and

they

> seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

> Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from the

list

> who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I know

this.

> No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an informational post

in

> case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who really

want

> information will just move on by then. Carole

>

> ----------------------------------------------------------------------

>

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Dear Carole,

What other lists do you belong to re: DS surgery that you like? I'd like to

join. I, too, begin to weary with some of what goes on here. . .

Thanks,

Robyn

btw

> btw, I am new to this list, joined about a week before started

giving

> us her post-op messages. I never once said anything derogatory about

> ror anyone who made neagtive comments to her. It upsets me greatly to be

put

> down by (when I didn't put her down) and Nick in Sage for no reason.

> Is this the way you treat newcomers? I was here when the old group all

left

> due to the bickering and I can understand now.

> I joined this list for information. I do not mean that I don't want the

> whole story and just the " nice " stuff. But I hate bickering and name

calling

> and put downs towards anyone and since that is what my original post was

> meant to convey, it amazes me that I was then made the subject of put

downs.

> Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other lists and

they

> seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

> Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from the

list

> who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I know

this.

> No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an informational post

in

> case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who really

want

> information will just move on by then. Carole

>

> ----------------------------------------------------------------------

>

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Guest guest

Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other lists and they

seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from the list

who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I know this.

No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an informational post in

case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who really want

information will just move on by then. >>>>>

Carole: Yes, we do welcome newcomers to the list. There have been quite a

few heated debates and issues on this list and (the moderator) and

myself (the co-moderator) as well as the list owner () have been

quite upset about this.

A lot of times people just respond and if you were involved in a thread you

become the unwitting brunt of someone's reaction to something.

I do not think the majority of people on the list are this way. I'm not

really sure why some people are rather jumpy and defensive about things in

general (or specific topics).

Currently, this list is NOT moderated. However, this possibility IS being

seriously considered because of some people's inability to let things lie,

calm down and stop making personal, barbed attacks at each other.

You are totally welcome to join any list(s) you want and being on this list

in no way means that you exclusively must stay... But, I wanted to tell you

that you are more than welcome.

all the best,

Noverr-Chin

co-moderator

lap ds with gallbladder removal

January 25, 2001

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Do you want new people here or not? I have since joined other lists and they

seem to keep on topic and answer questions and not put people down.

Just a note to listowner - did you know you can block anyone from the list

who is disruptive? I own a list on yahoo, too, and that is why I know this.

No comments on who might or should be blocked, just an informational post in

case this continues to get out of hand. Or maybe the people who really want

information will just move on by then. >>>>>

Carole: Yes, we do welcome newcomers to the list. There have been quite a

few heated debates and issues on this list and (the moderator) and

myself (the co-moderator) as well as the list owner () have been

quite upset about this.

A lot of times people just respond and if you were involved in a thread you

become the unwitting brunt of someone's reaction to something.

I do not think the majority of people on the list are this way. I'm not

really sure why some people are rather jumpy and defensive about things in

general (or specific topics).

Currently, this list is NOT moderated. However, this possibility IS being

seriously considered because of some people's inability to let things lie,

calm down and stop making personal, barbed attacks at each other.

You are totally welcome to join any list(s) you want and being on this list

in no way means that you exclusively must stay... But, I wanted to tell you

that you are more than welcome.

all the best,

Noverr-Chin

co-moderator

lap ds with gallbladder removal

January 25, 2001

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At 22:18 -0400 7/14/01, ruisha@... wrote:

>Currently, this list is NOT moderated. However, this possibility IS being

>seriously considered because of some people's inability to let things lie,

>calm down and stop making personal, barbed attacks at each other.

This is just my own personal bias, but I don't care for lists which

are moderated. If you feel you must moderate, I think doing so on a

person-by-person basis is better. It may be no great loss, but I for

one won't remain on a moderated list.

--stella

--

Stella Sloop MAILTO:serenn@...

5'3 " BMI 51 Weight 292

BC/BS of TN (denied 6/12/01; in appeal)

Dr Booth et al

)O(

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At 22:18 -0400 7/14/01, ruisha@... wrote:

>Currently, this list is NOT moderated. However, this possibility IS being

>seriously considered because of some people's inability to let things lie,

>calm down and stop making personal, barbed attacks at each other.

This is just my own personal bias, but I don't care for lists which

are moderated. If you feel you must moderate, I think doing so on a

person-by-person basis is better. It may be no great loss, but I for

one won't remain on a moderated list.

--stella

--

Stella Sloop MAILTO:serenn@...

5'3 " BMI 51 Weight 292

BC/BS of TN (denied 6/12/01; in appeal)

Dr Booth et al

)O(

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