shifting perspectives

[Guest guest]

I wanted to talk about a shift in my perspective that I believe may

be helpful to some.

As you all know, I've met this really great guy, Philippe. Today, he

and I have exchanged emails, and I've found it such a thrill.

Philippe emailed me that I had to call him because he wanted to hear

my voice. When I read that I had to stop myself from shedding a tear

at my desk at work. I'm such a baby when it comes to that stuff. My

heart's getting all topsy turvy about him.

I have this squishy feeling inside, and there's part of me fearing

that I'm gonna get hurt again. But I've got keep putting my heart

out there. Someday, the lucky winner will hit the dating lottery

jackpot with me being the prize.

There! There it is. The change in perspective. I'm the prize.

Before I used to view love and dating from the other side. I viewed

the other person as the prize that I'd be " lucky " enough to get. Now

don't get me wrong, I'm still insecure and all this dating stuff, and

I think Philippe would be the love lottery jackpot for me. But as I

was thinking about him, I started the old tape, " I'm not good

enough. What does he see in me? " But, at last, I have the ability

to recognize that negative tape and change it. That's when I

repeated to myself, hey, I'm the prize, and he'd be lucky to get me.

Like all this stuff, I have to keep repeating it to myself until I

believe it. Sometimes it's easier to believe than others.

This is particularly interesting to me since last Sunday, Joe

confessed his feelings for me. Joe and I have dated in the past.

He's a physician who works as a biomedical research investigator for

the FDA. He and I are both square dancers, and we've dated before,

but I broke it off when he told me he's " dating " someone in Santa

in an " open relationship. " Joe says he doesn't like the open

relationship and wants to explore dating with me—one on one.

Last Sunday he gave me a card that said, " Dear Francisco: This seems

insufficient when I write it… but you've become a light in my life.

Hugs and kisses, Joe. " Had Joe given that to me six months ago, I

would have been married to him already. But he wavered. I told him

that I could not be the reason for the breakup between him and Dave.

That had to happen independent of me.

Fast forward three months, and Joe's realizing that I'm not going to

be single forever. So we talked about what the card meant, and he

confirmed that he wants to explore exclusive dating with me. BUT… he

still hasn't broken it off with Dave. The fact that he's a doctor

with a beautiful home and a cabin at Donner Summit isn't enough for

me. I need the emotional stuff, and I feel like he's been toying

with my emotions, even if it is unintentional (I believe it is

without malice. I think he's not sure what he wants.)

But I'm sure what I want. And I know I don't want to be toyed with

because Joe can't figure out what he wants. Joe was deployed by the

Feds to work as a primary health provider in New Orleans because

there are not enough doctors to take care of all those who are re-

building their lives after Katrina. He's not going to be back in San

Francisco until after Christmas. And now I've met Philippe.

Oh goodness! It is amazing. I'm actually considering turning down a

doctor. What would my Mother say? But I know what I can tolerate

and what I can't. I know what's better for my heart…and who.

So, losing 153 lbs didn't make my life perfect. The choices become

more difficult because I have options that never existed before. But

that's the joy of this process. The choices may not be easy, but my

heart is alive and open and willing to risk it all for love. And

I'll keep risking it until I find him—the one I'm meant to be with.

So I'll end with a poem in the form of a prayer that I received in an

email just today from the Senior Minister of my church.

We see the signs but cannot always divine their meanings

You call us to move forward not always knowing

Whether what we grasp in our hands will prove to be a seed of hope or

a thorn in our flesh

Train our fingers, that what brings life we may with persistence hold,

And that which wastes our souls we may with grace release.

--Jan

Those words couldn't be more appropriate for me today.

Francisco

[Guest guest]

I wanted to talk about a shift in my perspective that I believe may

be helpful to some.

As you all know, I've met this really great guy, Philippe. Today, he

and I have exchanged emails, and I've found it such a thrill.

Philippe emailed me that I had to call him because he wanted to hear

my voice. When I read that I had to stop myself from shedding a tear

at my desk at work. I'm such a baby when it comes to that stuff. My

heart's getting all topsy turvy about him.

I have this squishy feeling inside, and there's part of me fearing

that I'm gonna get hurt again. But I've got keep putting my heart

out there. Someday, the lucky winner will hit the dating lottery

jackpot with me being the prize.

There! There it is. The change in perspective. I'm the prize.

Before I used to view love and dating from the other side. I viewed

the other person as the prize that I'd be " lucky " enough to get. Now

don't get me wrong, I'm still insecure and all this dating stuff, and

I think Philippe would be the love lottery jackpot for me. But as I

was thinking about him, I started the old tape, " I'm not good

enough. What does he see in me? " But, at last, I have the ability

to recognize that negative tape and change it. That's when I

repeated to myself, hey, I'm the prize, and he'd be lucky to get me.

Like all this stuff, I have to keep repeating it to myself until I

believe it. Sometimes it's easier to believe than others.

This is particularly interesting to me since last Sunday, Joe

confessed his feelings for me. Joe and I have dated in the past.

He's a physician who works as a biomedical research investigator for

the FDA. He and I are both square dancers, and we've dated before,

but I broke it off when he told me he's " dating " someone in Santa

in an " open relationship. " Joe says he doesn't like the open

relationship and wants to explore dating with me—one on one.

Last Sunday he gave me a card that said, " Dear Francisco: This seems

insufficient when I write it… but you've become a light in my life.

Hugs and kisses, Joe. " Had Joe given that to me six months ago, I

would have been married to him already. But he wavered. I told him

that I could not be the reason for the breakup between him and Dave.

That had to happen independent of me.

Fast forward three months, and Joe's realizing that I'm not going to

be single forever. So we talked about what the card meant, and he

confirmed that he wants to explore exclusive dating with me. BUT… he

still hasn't broken it off with Dave. The fact that he's a doctor

with a beautiful home and a cabin at Donner Summit isn't enough for

me. I need the emotional stuff, and I feel like he's been toying

with my emotions, even if it is unintentional (I believe it is

without malice. I think he's not sure what he wants.)

But I'm sure what I want. And I know I don't want to be toyed with

because Joe can't figure out what he wants. Joe was deployed by the

Feds to work as a primary health provider in New Orleans because

there are not enough doctors to take care of all those who are re-

building their lives after Katrina. He's not going to be back in San

Francisco until after Christmas. And now I've met Philippe.

Oh goodness! It is amazing. I'm actually considering turning down a

doctor. What would my Mother say? But I know what I can tolerate

and what I can't. I know what's better for my heart…and who.

So, losing 153 lbs didn't make my life perfect. The choices become

more difficult because I have options that never existed before. But

that's the joy of this process. The choices may not be easy, but my

heart is alive and open and willing to risk it all for love. And

I'll keep risking it until I find him—the one I'm meant to be with.

So I'll end with a poem in the form of a prayer that I received in an

email just today from the Senior Minister of my church.

We see the signs but cannot always divine their meanings

You call us to move forward not always knowing

Whether what we grasp in our hands will prove to be a seed of hope or

a thorn in our flesh

Train our fingers, that what brings life we may with persistence hold,

And that which wastes our souls we may with grace release.

--Jan

Those words couldn't be more appropriate for me today.

Francisco

[Guest guest]

WOW that was so beautiful Francisco. You are right with more

opportunities some time comes more responsibility and some times

tougher decisions. That you are at a point in your life that you know

you dont have to settle, that you can truly hold out for what you

have been longing for really shows the growth you have gone

through...Im so happy,proud,amazed, and awed by you!!

Huggles

>

> I wanted to talk about a shift in my perspective that I believe may

> be helpful to some.

>

> As you all know, I've met this really great guy, Philippe. Today,

he

> and I have exchanged emails, and I've found it such a thrill.

> Philippe emailed me that I had to call him because he wanted to

hear

> my voice. When I read that I had to stop myself from shedding a

tear

> at my desk at work. I'm such a baby when it comes to that stuff.

My

> heart's getting all topsy turvy about him.

>

> I have this squishy feeling inside, and there's part of me fearing

> that I'm gonna get hurt again. But I've got keep putting my heart

> out there. Someday, the lucky winner will hit the dating lottery

> jackpot with me being the prize.

>

> There! There it is. The change in perspective. I'm the prize.

>

> Before I used to view love and dating from the other side. I

viewed

> the other person as the prize that I'd be " lucky " enough to get.

Now

> don't get me wrong, I'm still insecure and all this dating stuff,

and

> I think Philippe would be the love lottery jackpot for me. But as

I

> was thinking about him, I started the old tape, " I'm not good

> enough. What does he see in me? " But, at last, I have the ability

> to recognize that negative tape and change it. That's when I

> repeated to myself, hey, I'm the prize, and he'd be lucky to get

me.

> Like all this stuff, I have to keep repeating it to myself until I

> believe it. Sometimes it's easier to believe than others.

>

> This is particularly interesting to me since last Sunday, Joe

> confessed his feelings for me. Joe and I have dated in the past.

> He's a physician who works as a biomedical research investigator

for

> the FDA. He and I are both square dancers, and we've dated before,

> but I broke it off when he told me he's " dating " someone in Santa

> in an " open relationship. " Joe says he doesn't like the open

> relationship and wants to explore dating with me—one on one.

>

> Last Sunday he gave me a card that said, " Dear Francisco: This

seems

> insufficient when I write it… but you've become a light in my

life.

> Hugs and kisses, Joe. " Had Joe given that to me six months ago, I

> would have been married to him already. But he wavered. I told

him

> that I could not be the reason for the breakup between him and

Dave.

> That had to happen independent of me.

>

> Fast forward three months, and Joe's realizing that I'm not going

to

> be single forever. So we talked about what the card meant, and he

> confirmed that he wants to explore exclusive dating with me. BUT…

he

> still hasn't broken it off with Dave. The fact that he's a doctor

> with a beautiful home and a cabin at Donner Summit isn't enough for

> me. I need the emotional stuff, and I feel like he's been toying

> with my emotions, even if it is unintentional (I believe it is

> without malice. I think he's not sure what he wants.)

>

> But I'm sure what I want. And I know I don't want to be toyed with

> because Joe can't figure out what he wants. Joe was deployed by

the

> Feds to work as a primary health provider in New Orleans because

> there are not enough doctors to take care of all those who are re-

> building their lives after Katrina. He's not going to be back in

San

> Francisco until after Christmas. And now I've met Philippe.

>

> Oh goodness! It is amazing. I'm actually considering turning down

a

> doctor. What would my Mother say? But I know what I can tolerate

> and what I can't. I know what's better for my heart…and who.

>

> So, losing 153 lbs didn't make my life perfect. The choices become

> more difficult because I have options that never existed before.

But

> that's the joy of this process. The choices may not be easy, but

my

> heart is alive and open and willing to risk it all for love. And

> I'll keep risking it until I find him—the one I'm meant to be with.

>

> So I'll end with a poem in the form of a prayer that I received in

an

> email just today from the Senior Minister of my church.

>

> We see the signs but cannot always divine their meanings

> You call us to move forward not always knowing

> Whether what we grasp in our hands will prove to be a seed of hope

or

> a thorn in our flesh

> Train our fingers, that what brings life we may with persistence

hold,

> And that which wastes our souls we may with grace release.

> --Jan

>

> Those words couldn't be more appropriate for me today.

>

> Francisco

>

[Guest guest]

WOW that was so beautiful Francisco. You are right with more

opportunities some time comes more responsibility and some times

tougher decisions. That you are at a point in your life that you know

you dont have to settle, that you can truly hold out for what you

have been longing for really shows the growth you have gone

through...Im so happy,proud,amazed, and awed by you!!

Huggles

>

> I wanted to talk about a shift in my perspective that I believe may

> be helpful to some.

>

> As you all know, I've met this really great guy, Philippe. Today,

he

> and I have exchanged emails, and I've found it such a thrill.

> Philippe emailed me that I had to call him because he wanted to

hear

> my voice. When I read that I had to stop myself from shedding a

tear

> at my desk at work. I'm such a baby when it comes to that stuff.

My

> heart's getting all topsy turvy about him.

>

> I have this squishy feeling inside, and there's part of me fearing

> that I'm gonna get hurt again. But I've got keep putting my heart

> out there. Someday, the lucky winner will hit the dating lottery

> jackpot with me being the prize.

>

> There! There it is. The change in perspective. I'm the prize.

>

> Before I used to view love and dating from the other side. I

viewed

> the other person as the prize that I'd be " lucky " enough to get.

Now

> don't get me wrong, I'm still insecure and all this dating stuff,

and

> I think Philippe would be the love lottery jackpot for me. But as

I

> was thinking about him, I started the old tape, " I'm not good

> enough. What does he see in me? " But, at last, I have the ability

> to recognize that negative tape and change it. That's when I

> repeated to myself, hey, I'm the prize, and he'd be lucky to get

me.

> Like all this stuff, I have to keep repeating it to myself until I

> believe it. Sometimes it's easier to believe than others.

>

> This is particularly interesting to me since last Sunday, Joe

> confessed his feelings for me. Joe and I have dated in the past.

> He's a physician who works as a biomedical research investigator

for

> the FDA. He and I are both square dancers, and we've dated before,

> but I broke it off when he told me he's " dating " someone in Santa

> in an " open relationship. " Joe says he doesn't like the open

> relationship and wants to explore dating with me—one on one.

>

> Last Sunday he gave me a card that said, " Dear Francisco: This

seems

> insufficient when I write it… but you've become a light in my

life.

> Hugs and kisses, Joe. " Had Joe given that to me six months ago, I

> would have been married to him already. But he wavered. I told

him

> that I could not be the reason for the breakup between him and

Dave.

> That had to happen independent of me.

>

> Fast forward three months, and Joe's realizing that I'm not going

to

> be single forever. So we talked about what the card meant, and he

> confirmed that he wants to explore exclusive dating with me. BUT…

he

> still hasn't broken it off with Dave. The fact that he's a doctor

> with a beautiful home and a cabin at Donner Summit isn't enough for

> me. I need the emotional stuff, and I feel like he's been toying

> with my emotions, even if it is unintentional (I believe it is

> without malice. I think he's not sure what he wants.)

>

> But I'm sure what I want. And I know I don't want to be toyed with

> because Joe can't figure out what he wants. Joe was deployed by

the

> Feds to work as a primary health provider in New Orleans because

> there are not enough doctors to take care of all those who are re-

> building their lives after Katrina. He's not going to be back in

San

> Francisco until after Christmas. And now I've met Philippe.

>

> Oh goodness! It is amazing. I'm actually considering turning down

a

> doctor. What would my Mother say? But I know what I can tolerate

> and what I can't. I know what's better for my heart…and who.

>

> So, losing 153 lbs didn't make my life perfect. The choices become

> more difficult because I have options that never existed before.

But

> that's the joy of this process. The choices may not be easy, but

my

> heart is alive and open and willing to risk it all for love. And

> I'll keep risking it until I find him—the one I'm meant to be with.

>

> So I'll end with a poem in the form of a prayer that I received in

an

> email just today from the Senior Minister of my church.

>

> We see the signs but cannot always divine their meanings

> You call us to move forward not always knowing

> Whether what we grasp in our hands will prove to be a seed of hope

or

> a thorn in our flesh

> Train our fingers, that what brings life we may with persistence

hold,

> And that which wastes our souls we may with grace release.

> --Jan

>

> Those words couldn't be more appropriate for me today.

>

> Francisco

>

[Guest guest]

Francisco I believe you are building your self esteem, and know you are a prize by changing your perspective about yourself. This is so wonderful, when people are heavy and don't feel good about them self we tend to lessen who we are. I so proud you know you're worth being the prize, that shows you have made good mind changes about who you are. I'm really proud you kept your boundaries with the doctor, material things doesn't bring happiness. Since he'll be gone until after Christmas this will give you some time to see how things are for you and Philippe. If you and Philippe work, then when the doctor comes back you can set your boundaries of friends only. If you and Philippe don't work(I hope you do, it sounds great) then you can still set you boundaries with the doctor that it's just you two and no more Dave. Keep your boundaries for the prize you are, and don't let any one step on them, you are worth it. Take

care, and good luck with finding the love of your life. Donnamanisodream wrote: I wanted to talk about a shift in my perspective that I believe may be helpful to some.As you all know, I've met this really great guy, Philippe. Today, he and I have exchanged emails, and I've found it such a thrill. Philippe emailed me that I had to call him because he wanted to hear my voice. When I read that I had to stop myself from shedding a tear at my desk at work. I'm such a baby when it comes to that stuff. My heart's getting all topsy turvy about him.I have this squishy feeling inside, and there's part of me fearing that I'm gonna get hurt again. But I've got keep putting my heart out there. Someday, the lucky winner will hit the dating

lottery jackpot with me being the prize.There! There it is. The change in perspective. I'm the prize.Before I used to view love and dating from the other side. I viewed the other person as the prize that I'd be "lucky" enough to get. Now don't get me wrong, I'm still insecure and all this dating stuff, and I think Philippe would be the love lottery jackpot for me. But as I was thinking about him, I started the old tape, "I'm not good enough. What does he see in me?" But, at last, I have the ability to recognize that negative tape and change it. That's when I repeated to myself, hey, I'm the prize, and he'd be lucky to get me. Like all this stuff, I have to keep repeating it to myself until I believe it. Sometimes it's easier to believe than others.This is particularly interesting to me since last Sunday, Joe confessed his feelings for me. Joe

and I have dated in the past. He's a physician who works as a biomedical research investigator for the FDA. He and I are both square dancers, and we've dated before, but I broke it off when he told me he's "dating" someone in Santa in an "open relationship." Joe says he doesn't like the open relationship and wants to explore dating with me—one on one.Last Sunday he gave me a card that said, "Dear Francisco: This seems insufficient when I write it… but you've become a light in my life. Hugs and kisses, Joe." Had Joe given that to me six months ago, I would have been married to him already. But he wavered. I told him that I could not be the reason for the breakup between him and Dave. That had to happen independent of me.Fast forward three months, and Joe's realizing that I'm not going to be single forever. So we talked about what the card meant, and he

confirmed that he wants to explore exclusive dating with me. BUT… he still hasn't broken it off with Dave. The fact that he's a doctor with a beautiful home and a cabin at Donner Summit isn't enough for me. I need the emotional stuff, and I feel like he's been toying with my emotions, even if it is unintentional (I believe it is without malice. I think he's not sure what he wants.)But I'm sure what I want. And I know I don't want to be toyed with because Joe can't figure out what he wants. Joe was deployed by the Feds to work as a primary health provider in New Orleans because there are not enough doctors to take care of all those who are re-building their lives after Katrina. He's not going to be back in San Francisco until after Christmas. And now I've met Philippe.Oh goodness! It is amazing. I'm actually considering turning down a doctor. What would my

Mother say? But I know what I can tolerate and what I can't. I know what's better for my heart…and who.So, losing 153 lbs didn't make my life perfect. The choices become more difficult because I have options that never existed before. But that's the joy of this process. The choices may not be easy, but my heart is alive and open and willing to risk it all for love. And I'll keep risking it until I find him—the one I'm meant to be with.So I'll end with a poem in the form of a prayer that I received in an email just today from the Senior Minister of my church.We see the signs but cannot always divine their meaningsYou call us to move forward not always knowingWhether what we grasp in our hands will prove to be a seed of hope or a thorn in our fleshTrain our fingers, that what brings life we may with persistence hold,And that which wastes our souls we may with grace release.--Jan

Those words couldn't be more appropriate for me today.Francisco Donna JordonDSJordon@...

Yahoo! Shopping Find Great Deals on Holiday Gifts at Yahoo! Shopping

[Guest guest]

Francisco I believe you are building your self esteem, and know you are a prize by changing your perspective about yourself. This is so wonderful, when people are heavy and don't feel good about them self we tend to lessen who we are. I so proud you know you're worth being the prize, that shows you have made good mind changes about who you are. I'm really proud you kept your boundaries with the doctor, material things doesn't bring happiness. Since he'll be gone until after Christmas this will give you some time to see how things are for you and Philippe. If you and Philippe work, then when the doctor comes back you can set your boundaries of friends only. If you and Philippe don't work(I hope you do, it sounds great) then you can still set you boundaries with the doctor that it's just you two and no more Dave. Keep your boundaries for the prize you are, and don't let any one step on them, you are worth it. Take

care, and good luck with finding the love of your life. Donnamanisodream wrote: I wanted to talk about a shift in my perspective that I believe may be helpful to some.As you all know, I've met this really great guy, Philippe. Today, he and I have exchanged emails, and I've found it such a thrill. Philippe emailed me that I had to call him because he wanted to hear my voice. When I read that I had to stop myself from shedding a tear at my desk at work. I'm such a baby when it comes to that stuff. My heart's getting all topsy turvy about him.I have this squishy feeling inside, and there's part of me fearing that I'm gonna get hurt again. But I've got keep putting my heart out there. Someday, the lucky winner will hit the dating

lottery jackpot with me being the prize.There! There it is. The change in perspective. I'm the prize.Before I used to view love and dating from the other side. I viewed the other person as the prize that I'd be "lucky" enough to get. Now don't get me wrong, I'm still insecure and all this dating stuff, and I think Philippe would be the love lottery jackpot for me. But as I was thinking about him, I started the old tape, "I'm not good enough. What does he see in me?" But, at last, I have the ability to recognize that negative tape and change it. That's when I repeated to myself, hey, I'm the prize, and he'd be lucky to get me. Like all this stuff, I have to keep repeating it to myself until I believe it. Sometimes it's easier to believe than others.This is particularly interesting to me since last Sunday, Joe confessed his feelings for me. Joe

and I have dated in the past. He's a physician who works as a biomedical research investigator for the FDA. He and I are both square dancers, and we've dated before, but I broke it off when he told me he's "dating" someone in Santa in an "open relationship." Joe says he doesn't like the open relationship and wants to explore dating with me—one on one.Last Sunday he gave me a card that said, "Dear Francisco: This seems insufficient when I write it… but you've become a light in my life. Hugs and kisses, Joe." Had Joe given that to me six months ago, I would have been married to him already. But he wavered. I told him that I could not be the reason for the breakup between him and Dave. That had to happen independent of me.Fast forward three months, and Joe's realizing that I'm not going to be single forever. So we talked about what the card meant, and he

confirmed that he wants to explore exclusive dating with me. BUT… he still hasn't broken it off with Dave. The fact that he's a doctor with a beautiful home and a cabin at Donner Summit isn't enough for me. I need the emotional stuff, and I feel like he's been toying with my emotions, even if it is unintentional (I believe it is without malice. I think he's not sure what he wants.)But I'm sure what I want. And I know I don't want to be toyed with because Joe can't figure out what he wants. Joe was deployed by the Feds to work as a primary health provider in New Orleans because there are not enough doctors to take care of all those who are re-building their lives after Katrina. He's not going to be back in San Francisco until after Christmas. And now I've met Philippe.Oh goodness! It is amazing. I'm actually considering turning down a doctor. What would my

Mother say? But I know what I can tolerate and what I can't. I know what's better for my heart…and who.So, losing 153 lbs didn't make my life perfect. The choices become more difficult because I have options that never existed before. But that's the joy of this process. The choices may not be easy, but my heart is alive and open and willing to risk it all for love. And I'll keep risking it until I find him—the one I'm meant to be with.So I'll end with a poem in the form of a prayer that I received in an email just today from the Senior Minister of my church.We see the signs but cannot always divine their meaningsYou call us to move forward not always knowingWhether what we grasp in our hands will prove to be a seed of hope or a thorn in our fleshTrain our fingers, that what brings life we may with persistence hold,And that which wastes our souls we may with grace release.--Jan

Those words couldn't be more appropriate for me today.Francisco Donna JordonDSJordon@...

Yahoo! Shopping Find Great Deals on Holiday Gifts at Yahoo! Shopping