Guest guest Posted January 23, 2006 Report Share Posted January 23, 2006 Francisco You absolutely did NOT look gaunt!!! You looked fantabulous!!! Dont let some one elses issues determine your self worth...even for a second. Isnt that what you told me on Saturday!! Huggles > > Hello everyone: > > I went out on a date tonight with who is a bit overweight. > He's a nice man who is handsome, articulate and has a nice career as a > psychologist. > > However, over dinner, he said that I was " gaunt. " I know that it is a > reflection of his own issues with being overweight, but being > called " gaunt " took me aback. > > Kay (in San Leandro) and , you saw me on Saturday. Did I > appear " gaunt " ? > > Why is this playing on my mind so much? Why do I care what this man > thinks of my weight/appearance? > > It's bizarre, but I hesitate going on a second date with > because his lifestyle doesn't seem to fit into mine. And it has > nothing to do with his appearance. It's a reflection of the fact that > I want to be with someone who is by nature active and healthy. I don't > want to have to change that part of anyone or struggle with HIS issues > around food. > > OK, I'll stop babbling... > > Francisco > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 23, 2006 Report Share Posted January 23, 2006 I was going to chime in here and say from seeing your picture you look the picture of perfect health. Sounds like this man is trying to make you insecure. It is probably the way he works his relationships. He has to be the one to dole out the advice. Good thinking to not see him again. You want a like minded individual that supports your beliefs and this guy isn't it. On a further note, I have had lots of co-workers asking me lately how much more weight I intend on losing? They are seeing me as too thin now and think I am going to get an eating disorder to get to a size 2. I keep saying my body will tell me when I am done losing weight. They aren't satisfied with this answer anymore. It is really getting annoying. They went from being my cheering section to now worrying about my health. I find that funny because you would think they want me to be at my optimum health. I think they as well are casting their own weight issues onto me. I used to be the second largest person in the dept of 15 people, now I am the 3rd smallest. Okay enough on that. Have a good day and go on more dates with different men! Your match is out there! Kay > > Hello everyone: > > I went out on a date tonight with who is a bit overweight. > He's a nice man who is handsome, articulate and has a nice career as a > psychologist. > > However, over dinner, he said that I was " gaunt. " I know that it is a > reflection of his own issues with being overweight, but being > called " gaunt " took me aback. > > Kay (in San Leandro) and , you saw me on Saturday. Did I > appear " gaunt " ? > > Why is this playing on my mind so much? Why do I care what this man > thinks of my weight/appearance? > > It's bizarre, but I hesitate going on a second date with > because his lifestyle doesn't seem to fit into mine. And it has > nothing to do with his appearance. It's a reflection of the fact that > I want to be with someone who is by nature active and healthy. I don't > want to have to change that part of anyone or struggle with HIS issues > around food. > > OK, I'll stop babbling... > > Francisco > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 23, 2006 Report Share Posted January 23, 2006 Francisco, Even though I have never met you in person, all the pictures I've seen...you do not look gaunt. You look the picture of health! I'd definitely not be seeing this guy again. You don't need that in your life. There are plenty of fish in the sea and the perfect one is out there...just waiting! Take care, Tina > > Hello everyone: > > I went out on a date tonight with who is a bit overweight. > He's a nice man who is handsome, articulate and has a nice career as a > psychologist. > > However, over dinner, he said that I was " gaunt. " I know that it is a > reflection of his own issues with being overweight, but being > called " gaunt " took me aback. > > Kay (in San Leandro) and , you saw me on Saturday. Did I > appear " gaunt " ? > > Why is this playing on my mind so much? Why do I care what this man > thinks of my weight/appearance? > > It's bizarre, but I hesitate going on a second date with > because his lifestyle doesn't seem to fit into mine. And it has > nothing to do with his appearance. It's a reflection of the fact that > I want to be with someone who is by nature active and healthy. I don't > want to have to change that part of anyone or struggle with HIS issues > around food. > > OK, I'll stop babbling... > > Francisco > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 23, 2006 Report Share Posted January 23, 2006 Francisco, here is a thought and I am sure you are going to respond to this one. Please don't take it in the wrong way. Its just that when I read your post, it really starts my wheels a turning and I see if from your view but I also try and turn it around and see if there is another way to see things. Sort of like sitting back in my seat for a minute to take it all in. I know you are about being honest and putting things out (just one of the many things I love about you) there but would it be so bad or denying yourself too much if you held off telling people about your surgery/reconstruction until you know that you know that you know they are the one. People say they understand but do they truly understand what you are telling them...mostly they don't. I mean date a while and then when you know it is going to last or is past that third date syndrome then as you develop and your relationship grows, then maybe when you have to tell about this then maybe do so. I mean I know that you have posted saying that you don't want to be known as Francisco the gastric bypass weight loss patient but rather as Francisco, so how about we allow them to find out who you are instead of feel like you owe them something or owe telling them because I feel like that is just one of the many pieces of information that they do not hold entitlement to until we are as one or a couple. I hope you understand what I am saying and please know that I am NOT blaming you for this. I just feel like some people are going to accept this thing and others are not and before you continue to expose something so dear and personal with someone that probably can't handle it, its probably better for you in the long run to wait a while. I mean unless you have to be intimate, no one is going to know that anything happened to you...right. I mean you can go out to eat and if the question arises about why you eat the way that you do, until you know that this is a keeper, you can simply respond that you are eating to live instead of living to eat or that you have become of the health risk when we don't eat properly or fuel our bodies with things that are good for it and leave it at that. Its not about being ashamed about this thing, its totally about protecting yourself, your identity, your life, your spirit and your emotions. Hugs to you and sorry about the Chip situation. Pam Marsh --- specialkmix2000 wrote: > I was going to chime in here and say from seeing > your picture you > look the picture of perfect health. Sounds like this > man is trying to > make you insecure. It is probably the way he works > his relationships. > He has to be the one to dole out the advice. > Good thinking to not see him again. > You want a like minded individual that supports your > beliefs and this > guy isn't it. > > On a further note, I have had lots of co-workers > asking me lately how > much more weight I intend on losing? They are seeing > me as too thin > now and think I am going to get an eating disorder > to get to a size 2. > I keep saying my body will tell me when I am done > losing weight. > They aren't satisfied with this answer anymore. It > is really getting > annoying. They went from being my cheering section > to now worrying > about my health. I find that funny because you would > think they want > me to be at my optimum health. I think they as well > are casting their > own weight issues onto me. I used to be the second > largest person in > the dept of 15 people, now I am the 3rd smallest. > > Okay enough on that. > Have a good day and go on more dates with different > men! Your match > is out there! > > Kay > > > > > > > Hello everyone: > > > > I went out on a date tonight with who is a > bit overweight. > > He's a nice man who is handsome, articulate and > has a nice career > as a > > psychologist. > > > > However, over dinner, he said that I was " gaunt. " > I know that it > is a > > reflection of his own issues with being > overweight, but being > > called " gaunt " took me aback. > > > > Kay (in San Leandro) and , you saw me on > Saturday. Did I > > appear " gaunt " ? > > > > Why is this playing on my mind so much? Why do I > care what this > man > > thinks of my weight/appearance? > > > > It's bizarre, but I hesitate going on a second > date with > > because his lifestyle doesn't seem to fit into > mine. And it has > > nothing to do with his appearance. It's a > reflection of the fact > that > > I want to be with someone who is by nature active > and healthy. I > don't > > want to have to change that part of anyone or > struggle with HIS > issues > > around food. > > > > OK, I'll stop babbling... > > > > Francisco > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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