Three Wishes--Experience and insights--got long

[Guest guest]

All,

The area I live in on the North Coast of California (Humboldt County) was

identified by the Three Wishes show as a target area. A few months ago, I was

contacted by an acquaintance asking for my help in writing nominations for the

show. Together we wrote some 25 " wish proposals " for area individuals and

non-profits. Yesterday--to our enormous delight--we found out that the show

will be granting 3 of the wishes we sent in for a show based in our area. I

feel we did a very good job on this (the show is not granting any of the over

200 other wishes sent in by area residents) and that I have some insights into

what the staff are looking for in a proposal.

Much of this is also basic things to keep in mind when you are trying to sell a

story. I sent some of this to ee last night, but I thought some of you

might find it helpful if you are going to write proposls of your own. I would

be more than happy to look over proposals and provide comments and editing if

anyone would like me to do that.

1. If you are going to send anything in to Three Wishes, do it right away. Who

knows how long this show will stay on the air. They will be here filming our

stories next month, for broadcast in December (that's my understanding, in any

case). I don't now how far out into the season they are planning.

2. While it's clear ee worked hard on her essay, it's far too long. By a

couple of pages. For this kind of thing, 700 words should be your absolute max.

The producers are looking for something short and sweet. Something as long as

what ee wrote will not make it through the first cut.

3. Say most of what you want to say in the first few lines. Your lead must be

a grabber.

4. Introduce the wish clearly and early on, don't tag it on the end. Make it

clear who is making the wish (parents? children? Dr Ponseti?) even if you are

making the wish on another person's behalf. My impression is that the show is

much more about the wish than about any particulars that lead up to the wish.

5. Assume that the show's staff not only does not have a clue about clubfoot

and its treatment, they frankly don't give a care. You have to make them think

that they way clubfoot is treated is important and that Dr Ponseti and his

method make all the difference. If you don't make them think this right off the

bat,they will not keep reading your essay.

6. Think about key words or phrases that you want the first staff reader to

take away: these are your selling points. Sell them.

7. Be very, very aware of what you are saying. These shows will stay far away

from any story that could get them into trouble. Don't bad-mouth any particular

doctors, even if it's vague. Don't bring controversies into your story that do

not need to be there. (This phrase, for example,jumped out at me in ee's

essay: " When he was 70 years old, the University of Iowa, where he still

practiced, forced Dr Ponseti to retire. " This makes it sound like it was

something personal. Even if it happened to be true, the show does not want to

take on UI. (And he was not " forced into retirement " , UI had a mandatory

retirement age at that time and later changed the rule which allowed Dr Ponseti

to come back. Just to set the record straight.))

8. I'm not allowed to give specifics, but from the stories the show picked, I

can tell you they are buying the sappiness. They are slurping up the sappiness.

9. I think it would be effective to have multiple submissions of the same wish,

though not necessarily multiple submissions of the same text. So the same wish,

but told as part of different stories.

If I can put my finger on it pretty easily, I'll forward a note from

Egbert that he and his wife sent to Oprah years ago. Though it's a little on

the long side (and, after all, we have our reasons for going on and on about Dr

Ponseti and the method), I find it to be exemplary.

I hope I'm not being to forward here and that this is useful to some of you.

Again, I'm happy to look at anything anyone wants to send me.

Good luck!

Naomi

The Family

Naomi Hannah(02/21/01) Jonah(06/20/03, corrected bilateral clubfoot, FAB

14/7)

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