Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 Hi Lunde, Hope you received enough encouragement to seek medical treatments right away. Life is precious, you can't stop fighting. I, too, felt defeated, I lost my job about three years ago as an Oracle programmer then found out I have GD in 01/03. Even though being laid off gave me some kind of relief from a tremendous level of stress I was having at work, losing a job hit me hard. Since we were waiting for a referral for our second child, we decided that I should stay at home. The economy after 9/11/01 cost my husband a job, we chose to adopt the second child anyway because we were so close to the adoption and we didn't know how soon our financial situation gets improved. Income from my husband's start-up business is very little, I'm watching every penny we spend, which I never did when we were having two paychecks. Sure, I have an insurance thru Blue Cross of California (Basic 1000), but it doesn't cover any of my visits to an endo and lab tests. BTW, I switched to a naturopathic doctor. My point is - you should not delay for treatments by medical professionals due to the financial status because GD does not wait until you get a medical insurance or a financial assistance. I'll be thinking of you. Katsuyo in California - it's my first post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 katsuyo: thank you so much for your words of encouragement...it means a great deal to me. i, too, WAS an oracle programmer/dba. i still don't believe the lack of work available, even as a contractor. however, the stress of working for Oracle was probably not very healthy for me, and working for the startup 24/7 was killing me. so it was good i took the sabbatical ... you all have been such help to me ... please know that i am trying. i AM trying to find the medical help i need ... it is just SO DIFFICULT to struggle with the disease AND the reality of life of today. this morning i finally did break down and cry ... tried to get the 'woe is me' teared out of me, and i went to the gym for a hour. I am feeling absolutely well this afternoon... no tac, no congo-drums in my chest, no dizzies, no trembling. tomorrow i'm going to try to find help in looking at how I can borrow from my assets instead of having to liquidate in order to get SOME type of cash. i know i have get the blood work to know where i stand ... but increasingly, it all seems just too overwhelming. thanks again lunde Re: To Lunde Hi Lunde, Hope you received enough encouragement to seek medical treatments right away. Life is precious, you can't stop fighting. I, too, felt defeated, I lost my job about three years ago as an Oracle programmer then found out I have GD in 01/03. Even though being laid off gave me some kind of relief from a tremendous level of stress I was having at work, losing a job hit me hard. Since we were waiting for a referral for our second child, we decided that I should stay at home. The economy after 9/11/01 cost my husband a job, we chose to adopt the second child anyway because we were so close to the adoption and we didn't know how soon our financial situation gets improved. Income from my husband's start-up business is very little, I'm watching every penny we spend, which I never did when we were having two paychecks. Sure, I have an insurance thru Blue Cross of California (Basic 1000), but it doesn't cover any of my visits to an endo and lab tests. BTW, I switched to a naturopathic doctor. My point is - you should not delay for treatments by medical professionals due to the financial status because GD does not wait until you get a medical insurance or a financial assistance. I'll be thinking of you. Katsuyo in California - it's my first post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 thank you donna, i'll check into these option tomorrow. To Lunde You are from CA? Go to any county or regional hospital and they will help you. You can get medi-care or cal, I'm not sure what it's called for certain, but you can get it if you are not employed. You can also sign up for MISP and you WILL get help! MISP is a program that goes by your income if you are working. I think it is for the unemployed as well. Please look in to these things. If your heart is bad, they will get you in ASAP! DO THIS LUNDE--your health is at stake! Hang in there. Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 Hi Lunde- You have to stop " trying " and do it. You can ignore what all of us are trying to tell you nicely about our experiences. The rest of your life doesn't matter until you get this under control. If it gets out of hand, you won't be able to recognize yourself. Sure, it might not happen to you but are you willing to take that gamble? I wouldn't have if I had the choice. I would have lost despite taking good care of myself. Part of the frustration of this disease for me is watching different people do the same things again and again with the same outcome. I don't understand why experience doesn't matter anymore. It used to be that people would listen to others when they had gone before them but now we're supposed to be supportive no matter what the choice is even though we know it's wrong. Whatever you decide, I hope your outcome is good. Take care, dx & RAI 1987 (at age 24) > katsuyo: > thank you so much for your words of encouragement...it means a great deal to me. > > i, too, WAS an oracle programmer/dba. i still don't believe the lack of work available, even as a contractor. however, the stress of working for Oracle was probably not very healthy for me, and working for the startup 24/7 was killing me. so it was good i took the sabbatical ... > > you all have been such help to me ... please know that i am trying. i AM trying to find the medical help i need ... it is just SO DIFFICULT to struggle with the disease AND the reality of life of today. this morning i finally did break down and cry ... tried to get the 'woe is me' teared out of me, and i went to the gym for a hour. I am feeling absolutely well this afternoon... no tac, no congo-drums in my chest, no dizzies, no trembling. > > tomorrow i'm going to try to find help in looking at how I can borrow from my assets instead of having to liquidate in order to get SOME type of cash. i know i have get the blood work to know where i stand ... but increasingly, it all seems just too overwhelming. > > thanks again > lunde Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 : sorry for contributing to your being upset or frustrated at people like me, so please let me explain. the reason that " i'm trying " is because i've gotten so spiritually tired; i'm at war with myself about continuing to fight for my life when there are so many obstacles, or letting go ... i'm sorry if this upsets you (because it upsets me as well), and it may be just part of my disease, but i'm am being frank, and trying to recognize that letting go is also an option ... and a part of the disease ... cowardly? i don't know ... i'm tired ... i hurt ... i wonder what the hell all of this is for ...i've been working so hard on my body and mind and spirit, and then Thursday night happens out of the blue ... i'm so sorry for making you frustrated or upset .... it just is. Re: To Lunde Hi Lunde- You have to stop " trying " and do it. You can ignore what all of us are trying to tell you nicely about our experiences. The rest of your life doesn't matter until you get this under control. If it gets out of hand, you won't be able to recognize yourself. Sure, it might not happen to you but are you willing to take that gamble? I wouldn't have if I had the choice. I would have lost despite taking good care of myself. Part of the frustration of this disease for me is watching different people do the same things again and again with the same outcome. I don't understand why experience doesn't matter anymore. It used to be that people would listen to others when they had gone before them but now we're supposed to be supportive no matter what the choice is even though we know it's wrong. Whatever you decide, I hope your outcome is good. Take care, dx & RAI 1987 (at age 24) > katsuyo: > thank you so much for your words of encouragement...it means a great deal to me. > > i, too, WAS an oracle programmer/dba. i still don't believe the lack of work available, even as a contractor. however, the stress of working for Oracle was probably not very healthy for me, and working for the startup 24/7 was killing me. so it was good i took the sabbatical ... > > you all have been such help to me ... please know that i am trying. i AM trying to find the medical help i need ... it is just SO DIFFICULT to struggle with the disease AND the reality of life of today. this morning i finally did break down and cry ... tried to get the 'woe is me' teared out of me, and i went to the gym for a hour. I am feeling absolutely well this afternoon... no tac, no congo-drums in my chest, no dizzies, no trembling. > > tomorrow i'm going to try to find help in looking at how I can borrow from my assets instead of having to liquidate in order to get SOME type of cash. i know i have get the blood work to know where i stand ... but increasingly, it all seems just too overwhelming. > > thanks again > lunde Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 Hi Lunde- Well, I can see why you're reluctant to do anything right now. What you've been doing has worked well for you before. Whether I'm frustrated or not makes no difference. Being tired, or hurt or cowardly makes no difference. This is not something the general population deals with and taking care of ourselves helps but it's still a struggle in the long term. I do not want you to wait so long that you end up like me. I can work on myself spiritually, I can fight for my life as much as I can, and I can overcome tremendous obstacles, but it's not the same as being whole. You can't wonder what all this is for. As you said " it just is " . That said it sounds like you can work on it if you choose. You can take a couple of days to rest and then make it a priority. But a priority it has to be. If you don't, things might not progress but what do you do if they do? It sounds like you're under a fair amount of stress which is not helpful. If a doctor tries to push you into something you don't want to do, you can always say no. You need a medical opinion. Some things you might listen to and others you won't but you don't have any choice if you don't go. Anyhow, quit worrying about what this is all about and do something aggressively about it. Being retiring doesn't work. Take care, dx & RAI 1987 (at age 24) Re: To Lunde > > > Hi Lunde- > > You have to stop " trying " and do it. You can ignore what all of us are > trying to tell you nicely about our experiences. The rest of your life > doesn't matter until you get this under control. If it gets out of hand, > you won't be able to recognize yourself. Sure, it might not happen to you > but are you willing to take that gamble? I wouldn't have if I had the > choice. I would have lost despite taking good care of myself. > > Part of the frustration of this disease for me is watching different people > do the same things again and again with the same outcome. I don't > understand why experience doesn't matter anymore. It used to be that people > would listen to others when they had gone before them but now we're supposed > to be supportive no matter what the choice is even though we know it's > wrong. > > Whatever you decide, I hope your outcome is good. > > Take care, > > > dx & RAI 1987 (at age 24) > > > > katsuyo: > > thank you so much for your words of encouragement...it means a great deal > to me. > > > > i, too, WAS an oracle programmer/dba. i still don't believe the lack of > work available, even as a contractor. however, the stress of working for > Oracle was probably not very healthy for me, and working for the startup > 24/7 was killing me. so it was good i took the sabbatical ... > > > > you all have been such help to me ... please know that i am trying. i AM > trying to find the medical help i need ... it is just SO DIFFICULT to > struggle with the disease AND the reality of life of today. this morning i > finally did break down and cry ... tried to get the 'woe is me' teared out > of me, and i went to the gym for a hour. I am feeling absolutely well this > afternoon... no tac, no congo-drums in my chest, no dizzies, no trembling. > > > > tomorrow i'm going to try to find help in looking at how I can borrow from > my assets instead of having to liquidate in order to get SOME type of cash. > i know i have get the blood work to know where i stand ... but increasingly, > it all seems just too overwhelming. > > > > thanks again > > lunde > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2003 Report Share Posted June 15, 2003 Hi Lunde, I think is expressing the frustration we sometimes feel when we KNOW we are telling you the 'right' thing to do and that your health will absolutely and positively suffer if you don't follow our advice. It's happened here before...we've had people who ask again and again for help and then never follow the advice given. Everyone who's written you has been pretty positive and helpful--but with a TSH like yours, there's no doubt you have full-blown GD, and you really have to go to the DOCTOR not the gym...even if it's a trip to the ER. There are free clinics around, I don't know how far from Berkeley or SF you are, but there are several here, that help many, many people and that you can get into without breaking the bank. I would imagine that where you are there are also free clinics. many doctors with reputable practices volunteer at these clinics, womens health centers etc., so my suggestion to you is, next time you have 10 minutes, get out the phone book and look--and make the phone calls! I bet if you start with your local hospital (if you don't find a free clinic listing) and ask them where to go, that you will get good advice. Going to the gym, when you have full-blown and untreated GD, is NOT a good idea, as it stresses your heart too much. You can't outrun this disease, you have to turn around and face it! Terry > > Reply-To: graves_support > Date: Sun, 15 Jun 2003 17:19:48 -0700 > To: <graves_support > > Subject: Re: To Lunde > > : sorry for contributing to your being upset or frustrated at people like > me, so please let me explain. > the reason that " i'm trying " is because i've gotten so spiritually tired; i'm > at war with myself about continuing to fight for my life when there are so > many obstacles, or letting go ... i'm sorry if this upsets you (because it > upsets me as well), and it may be just part of my disease, but i'm am being > frank, and trying to recognize that letting go is also an option ... and a > part of the disease ... cowardly? i don't know ... i'm tired ... i hurt ... i > wonder what the hell all of this is for ...i've been working so hard on my > body and mind and spirit, and then Thursday night happens out of the blue ... > i'm so sorry for making you frustrated or upset .... it just is. > > > Re: To Lunde > > > Hi Lunde- > > You have to stop " trying " and do it. You can ignore what all of us are > trying to tell you nicely about our experiences. The rest of your life > doesn't matter until you get this under control. If it gets out of hand, > you won't be able to recognize yourself. Sure, it might not happen to you > but are you willing to take that gamble? I wouldn't have if I had the > choice. I would have lost despite taking good care of myself. > > Part of the frustration of this disease for me is watching different people > do the same things again and again with the same outcome. I don't > understand why experience doesn't matter anymore. It used to be that people > would listen to others when they had gone before them but now we're supposed > to be supportive no matter what the choice is even though we know it's > wrong. > > Whatever you decide, I hope your outcome is good. > > Take care, > > > dx & RAI 1987 (at age 24) > > >> katsuyo: >> thank you so much for your words of encouragement...it means a great deal > to me. >> >> i, too, WAS an oracle programmer/dba. i still don't believe the lack of > work available, even as a contractor. however, the stress of working for > Oracle was probably not very healthy for me, and working for the startup > 24/7 was killing me. so it was good i took the sabbatical ... >> >> you all have been such help to me ... please know that i am trying. i AM > trying to find the medical help i need ... it is just SO DIFFICULT to > struggle with the disease AND the reality of life of today. this morning i > finally did break down and cry ... tried to get the 'woe is me' teared out > of me, and i went to the gym for a hour. I am feeling absolutely well this > afternoon... no tac, no congo-drums in my chest, no dizzies, no trembling. >> >> tomorrow i'm going to try to find help in looking at how I can borrow from > my assets instead of having to liquidate in order to get SOME type of cash. > i know i have get the blood work to know where i stand ... but increasingly, > it all seems just too overwhelming. >> >> thanks again >> lunde > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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