Off topic: You Know You Live In California When...

[Guest guest]

My sweet California born daughter that now lives in Maine sent me this. Too

sad that it is too true. Native Californian, Betty

You Know You Live In California When...

You make over $250,000 a year and still can't afford a house.

It's sprinkling outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all

the weather-related accidents.

Your child's third grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named

Breeze.

You can't remember... is pot legal?

You've been to a baby shower for an infant who has two mothers and a sperm

donor.

You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and

can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

You can't remember... is pot legal?

A really great parking space can move you to tears.

The guy in line at Starbucks, wearing the baseball cap, sunglasses, and

looks like Clooney, IS Clooney.

Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, and your Kay rep is

a guy in drag.

It's sprinkling out, and there's a report on every news channel about " THE

STORM! "

Hey... is pot legal?

Over 85% of the cities, towns, and streets start with San, Los, El, La,

Santa, De La, or De Los.

Two overcast days in a row drive you mad.

A family of four owns six vehicles.

Everyone who lives here knows that hurricanes, tornadoes, floods and

snowstorms are way worse than earthquakes, which are, after all, over

almost as soon as you realize what's happening.

Even if the store is across the street, you drive there.

Yeah, you're sure...? pot is legal.

And finally, a question:

Q. How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. None. Californians cannot afford to turn on the lights.