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,

I honestly have given up on getting any better or having a

normal life and I know she has too. She has given up and nothing I

can say or do will changer her mind. She wont listen to her husband

or even the children when they ask her to please try to find help

somewhere. I know I am spilling out my guts here, but I honestly

have no one to talk to about it.

Her husband told me that he has had all he can take and wants

to move out and he will stay there and raise the kids. He has tried

his best to get thru to her about seeking help and finding another

dr instead of the one who knows nothing about the pancreas and only

gives her pain medicine.

This is causing the kids harm and really hurting them. My

grandaughter said to me that we cant just leave Mom like she is,

what are we going to do? The shcool has called in a counseler from

a local mental health center for the youngest and also put him on

medication. This no longer just effects her, it is effecting the

children so badly and I dont think she realizes it or even wants

too. I tried to tell her what it was doing to them...she just sat

there and didnt even answer me. My grandaughter says she does not

want to stay there this summer and wants to come over here. She

called me last night and said to me that they are fighting again.

I just dont know what to do anymore. I have tried so hard for so

long that I am really worn out at it. I dont know what else to do.

I do so hate to see it effecting the kids like that tho.

This battle has been going on for over 7 years for her and it seems

like there will never be a happy ending or even a ending except a

bad one.

I dont know what is really and truly going to happen to . I

dont have any answers, I have begged, pleaded, got mad, yelled and I

cant get thru to her and I guess the kids cant either. It is a

vicious circle that has no end.

Sorry to be telling all of this but as i said I have no one to share

it with here and it seems to really be building up in me.

Jean

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Jean,

I am so sorry it has come to this...I have read your posts regarding

your daughter for as long as I've been on this site, and it has

upset me for everyone's sake, especially the childrens'. As well as

being upset over her attitude and how it is affecting everyone, it

has angered me also, especially when she has children that need her.

For a child to be on medication (I'm assuming it is

antidepressants), well to me if it has stemmed from your daughter's

noncompliance in trying to help herself, it is something that need

not have happened....and above all else, my heart goes out to you

for you can do nothing else but grieve what could have been, and

what was many years before.

Maybe this is the course her life needs to take to get her to wake

up and do something about herself, and if this means that she has to

move out, whilst her husband take care of the children, with you

helping and being there for his support, then so be it. It can't be

any worse for the kids than what they are going through now.

Eventually it might shake your daughter up to getting the help she

needs. Can her husband have her admitted to an institution to get

help with her depression? If this is possible, they might be able to

help treat her CP also whilst she is in there.

Geez, I hope it works out for you, and you already send me emails

personally, but if you ever want another shoulder to cry on, you can

write me, or ask for my phone number or give me yours...

Regards,

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Hi

I was just wondering whether some antidepressnts or changing them

and some counselling from a pain clinic might help .If somone is

suffering from depression they cant snap out of it even if they

wanted to.

Anoher thing that may well help is if lisa can express one nice

thing that she would like to do eg that she would enjoy it may be as

simple as a walk in the park something where she can take her mind

of her pain and or even a movie with the kids?

Another thing that i found helped mewas a tens unit which helps you

take the mind off the pain, what happens is that it disracts you and

after 2 weeks or so it actually is cumulative and it prodcues happy

endorphins and you start to feel beter and abl to cope,

take care

debs

-

-- In pancreatitis , " salliesue_7572 "

<salliesue_7572@y...> wrote:

>

> ,

> I honestly have given up on getting any better or having a

> normal life and I know she has too. She has given up and nothing

I

> can say or do will changer her mind. She wont listen to her

husband

> or even the children when they ask her to please try to find help

> somewhere. I know I am spilling out my guts here, but I honestly

> have no one to talk to about it.

> Her husband told me that he has had all he can take and wants

> to move out and he will stay there and raise the kids. He has

tried

> his best to get thru to her about seeking help and finding another

> dr instead of the one who knows nothing about the pancreas and

only

> gives her pain medicine.

> This is causing the kids harm and really hurting them. My

> grandaughter said to me that we cant just leave Mom like she is,

> what are we going to do? The shcool has called in a counseler

from

> a local mental health center for the youngest and also put him on

> medication. This no longer just effects her, it is effecting the

> children so badly and I dont think she realizes it or even wants

> too. I tried to tell her what it was doing to them...she just sat

> there and didnt even answer me. My grandaughter says she does not

> want to stay there this summer and wants to come over here. She

> called me last night and said to me that they are fighting again.

> I just dont know what to do anymore. I have tried so hard for so

> long that I am really worn out at it. I dont know what else to

do.

> I do so hate to see it effecting the kids like that tho.

> This battle has been going on for over 7 years for her and it

seems

> like there will never be a happy ending or even a ending except a

> bad one.

> I dont know what is really and truly going to happen to . I

> dont have any answers, I have begged, pleaded, got mad, yelled and

I

> cant get thru to her and I guess the kids cant either. It is a

> vicious circle that has no end.

> Sorry to be telling all of this but as i said I have no one to

share

> it with here and it seems to really be building up in me.

> Jean

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Guest guest

Jean,

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I cannot imagine watching one

of my children go through this and not being able to get them to get help.

Some people are just hard-headed. You would think she would want the relief. I

had a freind though who would not seek relief in other ways because she was

afraid they would take her pain meds from her. She was afraid she would still

hurt

and they would not give her anything.

I do hope and pray she will get help soon. If not for herself then for her

kids. It is hard on children to see a parent suffer. I am getting all the help

I can, not only for me but for my children. I did postpone my surgery until

June because it would be easier on my children. They will be at church camp

while I am having surgery and not facing the end of the year tests at school.

I will keep praying for you and for her!

Angie in SC

" The happiest of people don't necessarily have the

best of everything; they just make the best of everything that comes along

their way. "

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