To sam - over medicating, etc

[Guest guest]

I guess what you wrote in response to me is what I meant by

your situation being very complicated. What you have related to

us sounds all kinds of warning bells in my mind: warnings that

scream that your boyfriend is " in need of serious phsychological

help and / or detoxification therapy " . But that is a hard thing for

me to say because 1). I have no business making a judgement

of that kind; 2). he may have access to this board and any kind of

comment of that nature could make things even worse for him

and 3). I could be misunderstanding what you are saying.

But you are right, as far as the majority of the people that I know

with CP from this board and personally, no-one has the type of

behaviour that you are speaking about. Everything that you write

seems to be basic textbook examples of an addict. However,

because we are so sensitive to even saying that word, letting

alone admit that there could be one among us that truly is in

trouble, it is a subject that I tend to tip-toe around.

No doubt, you see first hand the behaviour....and you are right,

the need for an ER visit on seemingly minor occurences, the

hostilility towards his pain doctor, his unkempt appearance, his

denial, his exaggeration, his sleeping soundly inspite of being in

excruciating pain, etc all point to things being out of control as far

as needing the medication for reasons other than pain control. I

can say adamantly that in my situation, being in pain deprives

me of any and all kinds of sleep! To be honest with you, I tend to

agree with your belief that he is exagerrating his discomfort.

But what puzzles me the most about the situation is why isn't the

pain doctor or the in-patient nurses / doctors trying to get him into

a rehab program? If they are aware that his actions may not be

appropriate, then they are obligated as medical professionals

looking out for his best interest, to get him the appropriate help.

Even if he refuses, there are protocols that can be followed to get

him admitted against his will (not the best way to do things but it

can be done if the letter of the law is followed to ensure that his

rights are preserved). Drastic action, no doubt, but if things are

this bad with him, drastic action that may need to be done. At the

very least, his pain doc should be demanding that he go for a

psych consultation. He has got to see that his life is miserable

himself a zombie and alienating friends and family. I cannot fault

you for your caring attitude and your willingness to stick by him

during this awful time.

But, it seems to me that until he realizes that HE is being his

own worst enemy right now, and not the pancreatitis itself......and

until a doctor can convince him that he needs help and that there

is a way to control pancreatitis without losing all quality of

life....then he is going to keep on playing this " game " and

manipulate you and the system. I just fear that the system (and

you) is going to get so sick of him that he will have burned all his

bridges........Not a good place to be...alone, in rehab, sick with

pancreatitis with no doctor willing to offer him any pain control at

all........

Laurie