Hard News/OT

[Guest guest]

Hi y'all,

Our family has had a busy summer with my grandson, Austin here. For

those newer members who don't know my story, I'll briefly explain.

My grandson Austin was born here and his dad, my son , was sent

to Korea on a remote mission his first year in the AF. Austin and his

mother stayed here with us. Then just a few months before was

due to return to the states she moved to ton into an apartment,

taking Austin with her.

The week my son was due to return from Korea, Austin's mother called

me and asked us if we could come and pick him up, that she was " sick

and tired of the brat " , that raising a child was interferring with her

social activities and that she didn't feel she could care for him

anymore. We discovered that she was having an affair with another

man, and had been letting him live with her during that time.

Naturally, we were shocked, but without any hesitation, we drove up to

ton that night and picked up our grandbaby. returned

home the next week and came back home with us. He was granted a

divorce and custody of his son. 's next 4 year assignment with

the AF required him to be flying on the C-17's overseas on 4-6 week

missions, based in ton, but always being away from base. He

asked me to be Austin's guardian, and my husband and I cared for

Austin, who was then 1-1/2. We raised Austin until two years ago,

when finally got a new position as an Evaluator/Instructor in

the C-17's at Altus, AFB, OK.

The past two years and Austin have been happily living together

as father and son in a house on base in OK. It was an adjustment for

all of us, especially my husband and I, who felt as though we'd lost

our own child when he moved away. The good part of it was the time we

were all able to get together for Thanksgiving, Christmas and during

Austin's spring break, all times that they both spent here. And

Austin has spent each summer with us, too.

came home on June 16th to spend his leave with Austin and us at

home, and we've had a busy time since he arrived. We made plans to

take Austin with us on my husband's annual vacation next week, and

then he was supposed to return to Altus for the start of school. Last

night we got some hard news to deal with.

has just received orders to leave the first week in September

for a 6 month assignment to Iraq! Why they would chose to send a

single parent who is raising his child instead of one of the many

unmarried men is beyond me, but that's just one of the typical

downfalls of being in the military service. I'm feeling very stressed

out about this right now. We are delighted to have Austin back with

us for the start of his 8th grade, but distressed about having

to go to Iraq in a non-flying position. I'll just have to get used to

it, but I'm not happy about that part of it at all. Austin is worried

about his dad, and unhappy to not be able to see his friends from OK

for so long. He's made some close friends during his two years out

there, and although he knows a few boys here, they are all going to

different middle schools now, so it will be another adjustment at the

new school.

So our household is in turmoil for awhile, and we're all scrambling to

make all the changes. I may not be attentive as I usually try to be

for a few weeks until everything gets settled down, so bear with me!

And a prayer or two for the safety of my son, and for all our military

members who are serving our country, wouldn't hurt at all, if you

care to.

With love, hope and prayers,

Heidi

Heidi H. Griffeth

South Carolina Rep.

South Eastern Regional Rep.

PAI

Note: All comments or advice are based on personal experience or

opinion, and should not be substituted for consultation with a medical

professional.

[Guest guest]

Hi Heidi! I will be praying for all of you. I served in the Army and nothing

about how the select people for certain missions doesn't make a whole lot sense

to most people, It is just the way they do it. You know that going in, it's one

of the huge sacrifices we make. There is an organization I am involved in called

soldiers angels. Even though SA started as one mom support her Army son, It has

turned into a huge organization of caring Americans and Canadians who support

all branches of service whom are deployed. Your son can sign up on line. He can

choose his level of sponsorship. If he chooses to be adopted, someone sends him

at least 2 care packages a month plus mail. Or, he have just a steady pen pal,

or he can on a letter writing team which means he gets mail from lots of people

offering courage and support. I would encouarge you to check it out. I feel

really bad for the kids, but having an Army bratt of my own, I can tell you that

my child has made it through the most

incredible things and she has come out on top. Military kids are very

resiliant. I didn't see it so much when my daughter was little, but now she is

almost 16. The Airforce Times and the Stars and Stripes AE edition has good

info. It is of course, military propaganda, but your son being in as long as he

can, I am sure you have learned to read between the lines on that stuff. I also

know that there are Marine squads attached to all AF and Navy personel in the

zone. I admire you for raising little Austin and supporting your son as you do.

Military life is a hard way of life. It ages you before your time. I will be

praying for your family Heidi. I have family and friends over there too, I am so

ready for them all to come home (((HUGS)))-Kathleen

Heidi wrote:

" Life's Your Cup, Drink it Up " ...3 Doors Down

Kathleen

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Heidi,

you and your family, especially your son, will be in my prayers and

hopefully your son will only have a short time in Iraq and come home

safely. I can certainly see why things will be in such turmoil for you

for some time and you know you have my support and good will for you and

your family. You take all the time you need for your family.

Kimber

--

Kimber

Vallejo, CA

hominid2@...

Note: All advice given is personal opinion, not equal to that of a licensed

physician or health care professional.

[Guest guest]

That really is a shocker they would send a single parent to Iraq. I

wonder if they do that with females as well. Do you think they check

to see if there are some caregivers available to be with the child

(ren)? I know you will love having Austin with you longer and will

worry terribly about . That is exactly how any of us would feel.

8th grade is a tough age, all those surging hormones. I will keep

in my prayers and hope for his safe return home. I will also

pray for your strength and patience when dealing with a blossomming

adolescent.

Talk soon I hope,

Love,

Chrissy

[Guest guest]

Heidi,

Wow, that is a heartbreaking story. I cannot imagine a mother doing that to

her son. Thank goodness he had your and your husband to care for him. God

works in mysterious ways and so there has to be a purpose for all this that you

can't see now. I will pray for your son and for all of you with this transition.

Your grandson especially, eigth grade is such a hard age without all the

added stresses in his life. God be with you all.

Angie in SC

" The happiest of people don't necessarily have the

best of everything; they just make the best of everything that comes along

their way. "

[Guest guest]

Hi Heidi,

I also had my son and his son living with us when his " girlfriend "

left when the baby was five months old. After a few months they had

a custody battle and because the mom had a plan the judge ordered

they share custody. This worked pretty good. He lived with us every

other week until September 2001 when his stepfather physically abused

him. then had full physical custody and they lived here. He

fell in love and when he and Cheri got married two years ago they

moved out and I felt like I had my baby yanked away also. They ended

up moving in the same sub as us so I now get to see him anytime, but

I know the feeling when you lose those kids you take care of and love

so much. I am sorry your son is leaving. I agree it is unbelievable

that they would send him when he lives with his son and is his

guardian. I want to tell you about a system that my neighbor has.

Her husband was in the reserves and was sent to Irag. She has this

computer contact thing that they used three four times a day. They

talk as usual only they see each other while they chat. Her sons get

to see Daddy on the computer screen (its just this little 5 inch

thing) clearly. If you would like I can find out the infomation and

where to get this so you can have closer contact with your son. God

Bless You and God Bless you son for protecting us. Love,

(Michigan mom)--- > new school.

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