To Jerry: Re: pain doc .......bad pain

[Guest guest]

You know, if it wasn't so pathetically awful it would be almost

funny (your response) in a sort of off the cuff, bizarre sense of

humor way...gawd, what we have to endure with this illness. I don't

think I could have asked for a more disgustingly, loathsome illness

if I had tried. And to think that a few years ago, I couldn't have

told you what the pancreas did except for some vague notion that

it " might " be involved in the digestive process in some way.

In some ways, I'm still in the grieving stage as to the " death " of

my former life. I actually watch TV sometimes or see people walking

along and laughing and I still actually get teary eyed wishing that

I could be " normal " that way again..I can't really say " carefree " so

much not after 3 kids, 30+ years of marriage, etc., etc., a 25+ yr

working life which included my " illustrious " career (if you want to

call it that) as a Federal Gov't employee....so carefree? No....but

a life, yes, and I know I should be grateful for " life " period as in

this is NOT (so far as I know now) a terminal illness, as in I'm

sure there are people out there with terminal illnesses that wish

they had as much of a shot at a " rest of a life " as I do.

But quality of life? Now that's where I'm really starting to have

some major issues going on...and I suppose it's only natural right?

I DID have a tiny laugh though Jerry and for that I thank you!!

> >

> >

> > Yesterday, I got to feeling the teensiest bit better so I was

able

> > to take a shower after not having one IN FIVE DAYS!!! Too weak

and

> > sick to even think about getting in there...just played it as

best

> > as I could with deoderant and face washing/teeth brushing. There

> > were even two days that I wasn't even able to do that much so

> > believe me I know where you're coming from. The only problem is

is

> > that once I got in the shower I noted that it could use a bit of

a

> > scrubbing so I got my scrub brush and cleaning foam spray out and

> > very carefully (!) did my best to get it clean...now I don't know

> > for sure that that is what is causing todays problems but I'm

sure

> > it's contributed to it. Although there was also an alternating

bout

> > (all in one " session " as it were) with constipation causing such

> > extreme pain as it twisted and turned it's way down thru my

> > intestines that I nearly wanted to scream and then diarrhea to

top

> > it all off with. And as I've said before, the bowel movements

> > ALWAYS, cause problems with me.

> >

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